Is she testing your relationship?

Men can become very confused in relationships because women seem to react irrationally, they say things which to a man makes no sense.

This leaves the man frustrated and the woman feeling unappreciated, unloved, unattractive, taken for granted …. Yes, this the list could get quite long, if you get it wrong.

The irony is, a womans behaviour does make sense when you understand their goal, of course the man is to not usually allowed know the real goal, and there is a good reason for that too.

The examples below are generalisations and may not apply to your partner, but they give ideas of how translations could become confused and damage a relationship if they are taken too literally.

Discover real meanings behind what she says.

Remember to understand a woman (your partner) you have to think like her to translate what she’s saying. Then you must react like a man because this is what she really wants.

She might say…

That she hates you and she wants you to go.

The depth of her intention is dependant on what the man has done however…

…this could mean that her translation of what her partner has done has given her feelings of insecurity which she has now attached to him. When she attaches those feeling to him, her life partner, it scares her in that moment and she reacts strongly to that fear of potential loss.

To the man the statement is literal and very strong and so he could go in a rage and just go, or beg her to forgive him. It is likely that she does not want either of these reactions.

99% of the time she does not want the man to go. What she wants is for him to stay and convince her that he cares enough about her feelings to stay and help her to feel ok again.

What she could really want is reassurance, this could mean him standing firm and telling her that he loves her and everything is going to be OK.

Whatever she throws at him verbally is likely to be designed to get a reaction, does she hate the man all the time? Probably not she just hates the feeling she gets when he does XY or Z.

Lack of communication and understand is one of the biggest causes of relationship break ups.

If you would like to understand your relationship and build a future of great memories then why not talk to Stephen Hedger Relationship Coach

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