Relationship Test – 6 Questions

Complete the relationship test below to discover why your relationship may not be as good as it could be.

If you have any questions about this test then please contact Stephen Hedger Relationship Coach click here

How does your relationship measure up?

Take a few moments to score your relationship below now!

Score yourself from 1-10
1 = never fulfilled  -  10 = totally fulfilled

These questions are about how you feel about what you receive from your partner and if your core needs are being met. If you are unhappy this will start to explain why and in what areas.


Print this page out if that helps

Question 1

How secure does your partner help you to feel in your relationship?

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Question 2

Does you partner help you to feel excited about your relationship and future together?

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Question 3

Do you feel that you are the most important part of your partners life?

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Question 4

How much love do you feel you receive from your partner?

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Question 5

Do you feel that your partner is helping to grow your relationship to keep it alive?

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Question 6

Does your partner give to you and asks for nothing in return?

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Your scores

Remember these scores are from your own perspective and are therefore up for discussion with your partner, but what you feel is important and can fuel decisions. So find out where you really are in your relationship before you start pressing destruct buttons.

***The scores below are meant to be a guide only, so if you are unsure seek professional help.***

If your scores were 48-60 – Then you are in great shape. Keep an eye on those scores that were lower and ensure that you keep doing more of what is clearly working and do your best to get 10′s all round.

If your scores were 30 – 47 – Then your critical relationship needs are not being met and so this may be causing you to have problems. Look at the areas that are the lowest and see if together you can start to change the behaviours that are causing these problems.

If your scores were below 30 – Then you might be thinking about the chances of you both surviving. You are probably spending more and more time apart. If you are in this place all is never lost and with the right help you can discover the passion you once had for each other.

What did you discover?

Successful relationships can only happen when the core needs of both people in the relationship are being met. The most successful relationships work when the scores to all these questions are high.

This will give you a good snap shot of where your relationship is today and the areas which need help.

If you have scored your partner low, find out why you feel this way and how you can work together to fix this problem you are now both aware of .

There’s more

You can do the test again yourself and mark how you think your partner would score you. Then let them take the test and see how your answers compare.

Please feel free share what have discovered below.

How to communicate with women

One of the biggest complaints I hear from men is how hurt they are at the words that their wives use. Men hear the words that women use and take them quite literally.

  • For example: You never pay me a compliment! The woman will be focused on wanting to be appreciated loved and feel attractive to her husband. The man however will be focused on the word

Relationship Coaching Be Your Own Personal Relationship Psychologist

Are you considering getting help from a relationship expert, but are concerned about the fees and if it will work or not?

If so what are your options?

Going to a professional to get professional relationship help is a big step for any couple. The biggest worries are how much will it cost and what type of relationship help is going to work for us.

Do you choose

  • Relationship Counselling
  • Relationship Therapy
  • Relationship Coaching

A professional low cost session with a counsellor/therapist would cost you about

She Is Looking Angry What Do You Do?

Through a lack of understanding between the sexes and what each other needs, men and women can get into conflict very quickly. So a little knowledge can turn a potential war into loving.

The first rule is don

Step 6: Reignite the passion in your relationship

Step 6 – Relationship Rebuilding Process

Stephen Hedger helps couple understand that making time for the intimate side of their relationship is critical to reconnect you both.

The fundamental difference between those you love (friends & family) and your partner is the intimate side to your relationship.

Couples can find that they live in a lighter version of themselves in fear of sharing their true passionate selves. When they live in this state they are never allowed to be who they really are and this can kill the soul of those people.

Connecting with the true you is a liberating experience in fact this part of you is just one of many parts that all have their roles.

Stephen will help couples feel safe to share their darker needs and how to access these different parts of their personalities and take the relationship to a whole new deeper and exciting level.

Building lasting relationships with Stephen Hedger

To Make An Appointment Call: 0845 519 4808

Step 1: Discover The Real Reason Why You Have Relationship Issues

Step 1 -Relationship Rebuilding Process

Stephen Hedger will take his clients through a process of understanding their real problems that most couples would misunderstand and confuse for a good reason to separate!

Many relationships end for all the wrong reasons

Relationship issues can be displayed in many ways and if a couple is to get to the bottom of their problems understanding why these issues have appeared is critical.

Not getting to the bottom of what’s happening in your relationship can cause even a small problem to get out of hand and confuse the couple into thinking that they are no longer compatible.

For example

A couple is having problems and the result is arguing, or punishing each other in some way.

What happens is the focus of their problems could become the constant arguments that go round in circles, or they may reject being punished and this could become the reason they decide to separate.

Their arguments could be hiding a hard to understand underlying issue, such as not feeling enough for their partner, or afraid that they would not be loved if they were totally themselves. These types of issue are very difficult for most couples to locate and there could be 1000’s of complex reasons like these presented themselves to couples all over the country.

Stephen’s roll is to help couples uncover these potentially complex issues, so the couple can start to understand and support their partner rather than create a fearful self protected reaction, that threatens the very foundations of their relationship.

Building lasting relationships with Stephen Hedger
To Make An Appointment Call: 0845 519 4808

Step 2: What needs is the relationship not meeting?

Step 2 – Relationship Rebuilding Process

Stephen Hedger will help the couple understand how their critical needs are affecting their relationship their behaviours and their partners behaviours.

All individuals in relationships have needs that are critical for the relationship to be successful.

In the early days of the relationship it is very easy to meet all these needs at once.

As time goes by and the relationships settle down into daily life the needs that were being met can start to drift away. If these problems not addressed this can result in a passionless relationship where the couple love eachother, but live together as friends until one becomes unhappy and leaves the relationship.

For example

If an individual no longer feels significant in the relationship then they will go to where they can feel this way. This could be with friends, working late, hobbies or even an affair.

If one of the couple has to have financial security before they can open up to feeling of love this can damage the passionate side of the relationship.

So the order of the needs is important.

Stephen will work with the couple to discover their critical needs for the relationship to be successful and help the couple understand how these needs are driving their behaviours. These session will cover values and rules if one or both people in the couple have a destructive pattern.

Building lasting relationships with Stephen Hedger

To Make An Appointment Call: 0845 519 4808

Step 3: Rebuilding trust in your relationship

Step 3 – Relationship Rebuilding Process

Stephen Hedger will help the couple learn how to build trust that’s believable and lasting

When a couple go through any kind of relationship problem the trust in each other is dented in some way.

The natural reaction when trust, the foundation of their relationship is in question is to protect yourself this could result in arguments, stonewalling, or leaving the relationship temporarily or for good.

For example

The reason for a lack of trust can take forms. It could be due to an affair or that one individual does not feel secure in the relationship for some reason. It could be trust issues could be due to money issues or a feeling of not being respected or valued. The reasons are many and varied, and can be rational or irrational emotion.

Stephens objective is to help the couple re-connect through a trust rebuilding process and sincere promises to establish a foundation to rebuild their future on.

Building lasting relationships with Stephen Hedger

To Make An Appointment Call: 0845 519 4808

Step 4: Relationship growth & building a future together

Step 4 – Relationship Rebuilding Process

Stephen Hedger explains that if the relationship stops growing it dies. Building a compelling future together is critical.

When a couple first meet they have so many plans and life starts off so exciting. They put effort into the way they dress how they look, they constantly make plans together, weekends away, special nights out, presents, cards.

They then might plan to move in together, buy a house and maybe start a family.

What can happen to a relationship is that a busy life gets in the way and the relationship then has no direction, the individuals end up serving their own needs and soon as the relationship becomes all about ME! If this happens you’re really in trouble.

Stephen will help the couple get addicted to serving each others needs and get them making plans to ensure the relationship has an exciting direction.

Building lasting relationships with Stephen Hedger

To Make An Appointment Call: 0845 519 4808

Step 5: Dealing with Relationship Problems

Step 5 – Relationship Rebuilding Process

Stephen Hedger will explain that no amount of relationship work will stop problems arising in the relationship. What’s important is the way you work together to ensure the relationship is never affected.

Relationship problems can take 1000’s of forms.

Problems can be from outside pressures such as work, friends, family, money problems etc. Or problems can come from misunderstandings and assumption between the couple.

On top of all these potential issues we have the ever changing states the individuals go through the different communication strategies of the individuals and the massive difference between the sexes.

Stephen will help the couple understand the critical thought processes needed to keep the relationship problems at bay the couple secure and safe no matter what happens.

Building lasting relationships with Stephen Hedger

To Make An Appointment Call: 0845 519 4808

Step 6: Reignite the passion

Step 6 – Relationship Rebuilding Process

Stephen Hedger helps couple understand that making time for the intimate side of their relationship is critical to reconnect you both.

The fundamental difference between those you love (friends & family) and your partner is the intimate side to your relationship.

Couples can find that they live in a lighter version of themselves in fear of sharing their true passionate selves. When they live in this state they are never allowed to be who they really are and this can kill the soul of those people.

Connecting with the true you is a liberating experience in fact this part of you is just one of many parts that all have their roles.

Stephen will help couples feel safe to share their darker needs and how to access these different parts of their personalities and take the relationship to a whole new deeper and exciting level.

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The Relationship Building Process

Building lasting relationships with Stephen Hedger

To Make An Appointment Call: 0845 519 4808