Relationship Tip For Sunday

When couples get into relationship struggles one of the things they do is go in search of more problems and it’s doesn’t take long for them to find them.

They then put meanings to their problems, because as humans we have to make sense of what we think. Because we trust ourselves we then believe the meanings we create, those meanings become unchallenged facts.

Those facts then allow us to become the judge of our partners.

This is one of the most dangerous practices individuals make in their relationships. NO ONE, and I mean no one is qualified to judge the behaviours of their partners.

By all means give feedback on what effect their behaviours are having on you, but never judge them.

Your judgement will be based on your assumption of the intention behind their actions, and viewing their behaviours based on your life experiences and core values. Their behaviours will be based on their life experiences and core values which will be different to yours.

To complicate things further, men and women are designed to experience the world differently due to their inbuilt survival instincts.

So becarefull that some of your judgement is not based on them being in their true gender. This can cause problems as the couple can start to distort themselves to fit into the relationships thus causing even more resentment as a polarity shift can happen and the individuals can then become unhappy or depressed as life is not how it should be.

The woman becomes masculine and the man becomes feminine. Neither happy in these roles, but ironically stuck not wanting to change through fear.

Judgements of others shows you and those you judge little to no respect, values such as respect are important to us, not some of the time, ALL THE TIME!

When you don’t live by what you say you value, trouble, unhappiness, depression, relationship break-ups are never far away.

So…turn your judgments into a cry for help from your partner, that for them something is wrong, and they are telling you because they believe you can help them.

If you knew what they really needed was your help, what would you want to give them now…?

Today’s Relationship Tip

If you want an amazing relationship full of passion one that will last, what has to happen? Today I am going to share with you one tip that will make all the difference.

This is the thing that most people fear doing and most of us are conditioned not to do when relationships get tough.

The secret is to become the best partner you can be today, no matter what you believe your partner has done to you.

I assume if you have a relationship that you want to keep it? So how attractive do you think you are to your partner when you pull your love away?

Relationships usually work in the opposite ways to what you think, so be brave and become the person you want to be NOW. Don’t change who you are due to your fears, stay strong and become someone who no matter what, can stay focused on who they are.

If you are a loving person give love, if your partner has done something that has hurt you, it is very likely that you have very little understanding of their behaviours, you have not had their life or their upbringing so you are not qualified to judge them so…

Rather than judging them love them in times that they feel pain and understand this. Very often we hurt those closest to us, but the real message is that they feel safe to be who they are with you and they are telling you they want help and they trust you to be that help.

Love is always the answer. So give it unconditionally and without fear. Most of us want unconditional love, but we are too scared to give it. Your relationship will suffer if this is you, remember you don’t love to receive love, you love because that is a part of who you are.