How to Build Your Confidence

Boosting a persons’ confidence can have amazing effects on their lives, it’s so important to know how to achieve it especially where it counts.

What’s interesting about confidence is someone can be incredibly confident in one area of their life and be totally lost in another.

I see this in couples a lot, for example the man can be a huge success at work yet flounder in his marriage. He tries to use the success model he uses for work and wonders why his wife is unhappy, snapping at him that she not his employee

“…clearly there is something wrong with her after all I get on so well with all the women at work!” Actual words a CEO gave me in a session!

What’s great about gaining confidence is it can be learnt.

One of the key ingredients in the work I do with couples and individuals is how to build a strong confident inner self and this confidence comes from understanding… [Read more...]

I’m constantly in fear of losing him…

Whats interesting about this message is, that the focus on losing him will make losing him a possibility. If you are in this place, or you know of  a friend who has this worry the best way to help is through understanding.

Have a think about these words

  • How attractive is the person that is always worrying?
  • The person worrying is likely to be very behaving differently from the happy version of her
  • Controlling behaviours are very likely
  • Loss of emotional control through fear
  • Maybe looking for proof he will go

You see the best way to keep your man is to become an amazing you, if you worry and focus negatively you become internally focused and on a search for more  problems. Of course you will find them which will help you to worry more. In this place you will want to protect you, and so you may pull your love away just in case, of course he feels this and will start to feel he is failing you.

  • Your focus on your problems is helping him to feel bad about himself, if this goes on for too long he will attach those bad feeling to you.

The best way to keep your partner is to change your focus from worry about losing him to a new question focused on keeping him. What kind of man does my husband or partner want to be, and what kind of behaviours in a woman would he find attractive?

You only have to look back to your dating days to find answers…

What I am saying is switch your focus to becoming an amazing you. The fearful you is hurting you both. Your mission is to create a new confident you one that understands your own needs, one that knows how to give herself what she needs and is then free to fearlessly give to her partner what he needs.

The focus of this new woman is on growth and contribution, her focus is on where she is going and who she wants to be, so she feels safe to give.

If you are interested to learn more about how to stop negative behaviours and build confidence please get in touch today.