What feelings is your partner attaching to you
without you knowing?
When you help someone to feel great about themselves when they are in your company, they will attach all their great feelings to time spent with you.
But beware, the reverse is also true and you may not know it’s happening.
Become an anchor for happiness
Help your partner to feel great about themselvess when they are with you today, this is the single best action you can take for relationship success. All of their senses will tune into your voice, the way you look, the way you smell and where they were when they felt great, these are triggers being created for moments in time, this is what we call an anchor.
When a past memory is created, it can be remembered through a trigger such as a sound, a sight or a smell that is the same or similar to that past experience.
This anchoring process is at play when people are dating. It is one of the reason the couple canÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t get enough of each other. They both get addicted to their own feelings and then crave more of each other.
Longer term successful relationships still need those anchors to survive.
Whilst our relationship values change as the relationship matures. Values like long term security become one of the anchors that help us all to feel good about ourselves in our relationships.
We still need to feel confident that our partners care enough to want us to feel great and that the relationship is not being held together by just one person.
For example a woman may feel that she is being taken for granted. So now sheÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s attaching bad feeling to the man. She may take all that built up anger out on him over something small which to him seems an emotional over reaction.
Now both people in this relationship are starting to attach bad feelings to each other.
She is at fault for assuming he is a mind reader and knows what she is feeling. He is at fault for assuming he knows whatÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s caused her to become upset. Confused they both attach bad feelings to each other.
It’s the little things
Of course these little things will not break the relationship, but over time they can build-up, and resentment can become a very powerful emotion that can override the value of security.
When your partner attaches a lack of security to you then the relationship is in real trouble.
Relationships that are in trouble have helped either one or both people to experience bad feelings and attached those feeling to their partners, avoid this today.
Discover how you can help your partner to feel great about themselves in your company and take action now! Your relationships are valuable so look after them.
Re-ignite those good anchors. One great idea is to re-create a time when you both felt great such as a first date or a special restaurant. Take yourselves back in time and remember all the reason why you got together in the beginning.
Try it and let me know how you get on in your comments section below.