As our relationships progress our partners are attaching feelings to us. This happens automatically without conscious thought.
So if you cast your mind back over the past week? The past month and the last few years what do you think your partner has attached to you and is it what you want them to attach to you?
Some couples experience heightened attachments, such as when a trust is broken. This can create an attachment that stays with that person forever.
I have seen individuals experience such a painful experience with their partner that they hold onto that attachment to their partner for over 20 years.
The question is what do you want your partner to attach to you?
You see we can help our partner to create wonderful loving and growth orientated attachments we all have the power to do this, we just need to learn how.
The problem for many couples is they don’t know how, or worse they think they know how and they don’t.
The best person to ask is your partner as they can tell you how loved they feel by you. They can tell you how important they feel to you. They can tell you if the relationship is growing in the direction that feels right to them.
The biggest challenge I see is couples really struggle with this because they are confused by they partners actions and words.
The confusion is due to the massive differences between men and women how they behave and their expectations of each other.
The best message I can give you today is to be aware of what you are attaching to your partner and respect what they feel regardless if you agree or not.
You see being right is not as important has your partners happiness, because they will stack and attach their bad feelings to you, especially if they feel their feelings are not important to you.
Stacking bad feelings is a major problem as over time it leads to resentments, detachments and loss of respect.
Relationships cannot survive with these feelings present. So please be aware it’s critical to understand all the above.
Harley Street Expert | Founder & High Performance Coach
With two decades of experience helping couples out of crisis, Stephen the founder of The Marriage Breakthrough Program, uses his proven system for rescuing and rebuilding relationships on the edge of divorce. A trusted advisor to CEOs, entrepreneurs, and industry leaders globally, his work blends emotional intelligence with strategic clarity. Known for navigating highly complex relationship challenges, Stephen helps individuals and couples find clarity and direction when everything is at stake.
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