If you want your marriage to work and your partner won’t seek help what do you do? This post is about how to save your marriage alone.
How you can make a difference in your relationship even if your partner doesn’t want to try?
The starting point is this: You have to know it is possible to save your marriage on your own, but you’re going to have to make some changes in the way you listen, understand your partner and how you behave.
You see, if you are going to have a positive effect on the way your partner sees the relationship and you, he or she is going to have to believe you understand them and see you are taking actions that reflect that.
They are not going act well to manipulation in this place. For example: If a wife is trying to get her husband back, she can’t put him down one minute and then love him the next. He will see she is desperate, he wont trust it and she won’t save the marriage.
What you have to remember is the reason your partner is struggling is because they have stacked proof that nothing will change and their future with you will be the same as the past. If you provide more proof their feelings are true by giving resistance you will hinder your quest to save your marriage.
What’s important here is listening to what they say and not to contradict them. What they say is connected to what they feel and if they say they want to leave because you make them miserable accept that as their feeling.
Your answer is, if they feel that miserable then you understand why they feel they want to leave.
You see the starting point to getting through is helping someone feel you understand why they are feeling what they are feeling, by agreeing with their words. This is important because it lowers their defenses and opens the way for communication.
Once you have them taking and they feel you are really listening, then you can start to understand what needs are missing for them.
You see when a persons needs are not met in a marriage they will become unhappy and this can result in them feeling that leaving is the best option.
You job is to validate their feelings even if you don’t fully understand them and listen to what they have been going through with you.
Don’t make them wrong, make learning about your partner your mission.
To do this you must understand what you partner has attached pain to with you and how their critical needs are in deficit.
The fastest route to success is do what my clients do. Know it’s possible to break old destructive patterns fast, by learning about how to become an amazing partner to be with. The moment the changes you make are in line with what your partner wants, especially if it’s from a position of you showing you understand them, your chances of success are high.
Your coping strategies won’t work so please if you are serious about learning about How To Save Your Marriage Alone.
Call us today 0845 519 4808