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Stephen Hedger

Stephen Hedger

Crisis Marriage Coach | Harley Street London

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The Calm Before The Storm: A Message For Men – Is There A Time Bomb In Your Relationship?

Most men who have experienced problems in their relationship are usually very confused at why it seems so hard to please their partners. For him it can seem almost impossible to keep her happy. He can also feel he has put up with what he feels is her becoming over emotional, irrational and inconsistent for ages.

For him this inability to be able to please his partner is emotionally crippling, BUT he can do something to help her, but most men don’t know what to do…

If this goes on for long enough the woman will start to feel that the messages she has clearly been giving to him has not being listened to. She feels alone, ignored and insecure.

This for her can lead to depression and all sorts of physical and emotional problems putting further pressure on the relationship.

Depending on how the man has dealt with her emotional outbursts will drive her next course of action.

She may decide based on his reaction to her past messages that there is little point communicating with him as he will never get it, no matter how she communicates…

Beware: If she seems calm yet detached.

This is the calm before the storm. A very big storm! This is when she feels she is not understood and she can become emotionally detached from the man that says he loves her. She feels his words are cheap and his actions are little to non-existent, at this point she feels the trust and the love has gone.

So she stops feeling safe with him. She is on red-alert for proof that he is not right for her and it’s not long before she finds a lot of proof.

When she looks in her past she suddenly finds more and more proof that she should have read the signs earlier, she can start to blame herself as she becomes resigned to her fate.

You see she starts to regret choosing him because when she is with him she feels bad about herself.

Now all this emotion is happening within her, no sounds are coming from her, to him this peace equals all is well. To her she cannot believe he is still doing nothing! Actually she has lost so much confidence in him she can believe it. So she starts to plan escape routes…

Men if this is happening to you seek help quickly!

You are lacking a few simple skills that will enable you to get her back to feeling good about herself again when she is around you, this is what you want!

Quick recap

If she is consistently quiet and slightly detached from her normal self, there is a strong possibility for her the relationship is going through an accelerated death within her.

She will be silently testing you and watching you fail, but saying nothing. She is doing this so she can be sure leaving is the right move.

So if she used to blow up, get upset, now she’s quiet yet detached and the intimacy has gone, don’t leave this alone it won’t go away.

  • There is potentially a bomb in your relationship!

If this has struck a chord with you and you would like to talk about it please get in touch.

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Stephen Hedger
Stephen Hedger
About the author:

Harley Street Expert | Founder & High Performance Coach

With two decades of experience helping couples out of crisis, Stephen the founder of The Marriage Breakthrough Program, uses his proven system for rescuing and rebuilding relationships on the edge of divorce. A trusted advisor to CEOs, entrepreneurs, and industry leaders globally, his work blends emotional intelligence with strategic clarity. Known for navigating highly complex relationship challenges, Stephen helps individuals and couples find clarity and direction when everything is at stake.

Click to find out more >>> The Marriage Breakthrough Program
Stephen Hedger
Latest posts by Stephen Hedger (see all)
  • How can we tell if we are heading for divorce? - October 19, 2025
  • Why does a woman that loves her husband have multiple affairs? - July 15, 2025
  • Loss of Love? How to Save Your Relationship - June 26, 2025

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I’m not going to ask you how you “feel", pay me to watch you argue, or try to find the person to blame.

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A 30 minute call with Stephen

In a short phone conversation, Stephen was able to quickly get to the heart of what the real issue was in our marriage – and why in almost a year of working on our marriage including 10 weeks of marriage counselling through a relationship therapy organisation, we weren’t really making any progress. I found Stephen to be extremely perceptive, as well as empathetic to our situation, while being able to quickly pinpoint the real sticking point in our marriage.
Many thanks
Olivia

Dear Stephen
Thank you for your time to listen to my experience in my marriage. You gave me encouragement to speak out to my partner in confidence. You made me realise that sometimes the way we make comments on each other can aggravate the situation and make it worse. Your advice made me feel revived.

Kind regards

Chipo

Success Stories

“The Affair Wasn’t the End. It Was the Wake-Up Call.”

December 18, 2025 By Stephen Hedger

He didn’t come to fix his marriage. He came because everything he thought he knew about himself had collapsed. An affair was the symptom, not the cause. What follows is the story of how ownership replaced blame, fear gave way to leadership, and a marriage that should have ended found a future worth fighting for. […]

“I was planning our separation and divorce”

November 27, 2025 By Stephen Hedger

We appointed Stephen when our marriage was in crisis. I had started planning our separation and divorce following on from discovering my husband’s short-term affair which occurred at the latest stages of my pregnancy. My husband had lied about the affair which I discovered a year later.  The timing was extremely sensitive and the deceit was […]

Case Study – “My journey to peace and looking forward to the future” 

November 12, 2025 By Stephen Hedger

When your relationship with yourself is fractured, every relationship you enter will reflect that fracture. This woman faced years of hidden pain that surfaced when her marriage began to collapse. What follows is her story a raw, courageous journey from survival to peace, and from trauma to self-leadership in her own words. She was keen […]

“After 39 years, we finally stopped the cycle we thought we’d never escape.”

November 4, 2025 By Stephen Hedger

Stephen’s Marriage Breakthrough Program is designed to end conflict fast, rebuild safety, and live in the best part of our marriage without therapy or blame.” Question: What were the problem(s) that made you seek Stephens’ help? My wife and I had everything you could wish for in life after 39 years of marriage. Material stability […]

Disconnected for over 20 years…

October 26, 2025 By Stephen Hedger

What do you do when your marriage has been disconnected over 20 years, when you have tried many kinds of help without success. Do you give up or search for a new approach? What were the problem(s) that made you seek Stephens help?  My husband and I will have been married for 40 years next […]

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Recent Posts

  • “The Affair Wasn’t the End. It Was the Wake-Up Call.”
  • Why Marriages Fail… (This is why love isn’t enough)
  • The Dangerous Delay in Marriage:
  • “I was planning our separation and divorce”
  • 5 Ways Smart Couples Go Emotionally Broke

*Disclaimer:
Any testimonials stated on this page or on any pages on the Stephen Hedger Marriage Coach website/s are proof of our success, naturally, results may vary from person to person.

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