Stephen Hedger

Crisis Marriage Advisor | Harley Street London

Does your wife wear the trousers in your house, is she more of a man than you are. Is she strong decisive, consistent. Is she the security in the relationship protecting you from what she’s really feeling?

Some men are attracted to strong women and some women are attracted to weaker men but, does this make for a relationship that will last?

This is really down to the couple, as long as the polarity is present it doesn’t matter who takes the strong lead as long as the couple are happy with the dynamic.

The challenge I see in my relationship clinics is when the men are torn because being weaker in the relationship feels good, but it also doesn’t. It’s like when she’s strong it feels like home, but he also feels abused no longer respected.

She feels safer being in control of him, but she longs to be swept off her feet, she wants to be vulnerable but she fears what will happen if she is with him so it’s safer to control him.

What if the initial attraction is now the reason why the relationship is failing. If this is the case action is needed to correct the polarity and rebuild their identities and roles in the relationship.

The symptoms to watch out for…

She will becoming more and more detached from her true self and him and he will be losing hope of ever being able to please her he may become even more needy as she gets stronger to cope. Loss of intimacy is normal part of this process.

  • The relationship can be saved, but a new understanding on both sides has to take place.
Stephen Hedger
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