Marriage counselling not working for you? Please don’t give up!

A significant percentage of my clients come searching for a different approach after failing to achieve their goals with traditional couples therapies.

If you feel that you have tried everything reading this is
important to know before you give up. 

My belief is that couples in trouble need a very specific approach, an approach that firstly enables them to connect to their true identities before we focus them on how to fix their specific problems. Time and time again this approach works as the individuals become free to safely explore their relationship with a new philosophy that will keep them safe no matter what happens.

This focus on the individuals is important because if you focus couples on their problems too early in the process the individual(s) will become even more entrenched in naturally protecting themselves. Fearful states will naturally shut their minds down and so they are not open to the change that’s needed to fix their problems. Change at this point is far too overwhelming. [Read more...]

Marriage reconciliation: Can a marriage with years of problems be saved?

Marriage Reconciliation is it possible really?  Well those that have been reading my posts for a while now will know my answer. Why? Because I see it every day in my practice.

BUT today I’m going to share with you how it’s actually possible, why do my clients create a shift that changes their marriage from a total belief it’s NOT possible to solve their marriage problems to creating a connected passion that’s deeper than they have ever experienced. [Read more...]

Rebuild trust in marriage: Can A marriage Survive without it?

I’m just going to jump into this post fast today. Without trust the marriage is dead so it’s critical to rebuild trust in a marriage fast. Trust is a foundation of any relationship.

The reason trust is so important is because without trust the couple will lose their security with each other. If the security has gone the couple will struggle to connect emotionally.

Loss of emotional connection creates intimacy challenges. [Read more...]

Marriage Guidance Advice

Marriage guidance advice is about discovering what you don’t know about your marriage that could cause you significant problems either now, or in the future.

For example:

  • If you can’t communicate do you really know why?
  • If the intimacy in your marriage has died, can it ever come back? [Read more...]

Marriage Help For Couples With Marriage Problems

If you’re having marriage problems and you’re struggling to solve it, your going to need marriage help before the problem gets too serious. Most couples in trouble have usually experienced problems that keep coming back and this is because of one key problem…

You are both doing something that’s potentially destructive without knowing.

So if you’re both not aware of how you’re contributing to the marriage negatively then this means the foundations of the marriage are compromised. [Read more...]

If your sex life is dead…

If the sexual intimacy in your relationship has disappeared what does that make your relationship? The answer is not great, at best, you are good friends!

BUT… does it have to be this way? Of course not…

With the right attention your relationship has every chance of making a full recovery sexually.

The question is this, has what you’ve done so far worked to improve your relationship and sexual intimacy?

If the answer is “NO” now you know what to never try again.

So now what? If you want to ignite the spark of sexual energy back into your relationship you have to help your partner get connected to the right polarity with themselves.

If a woman doesn’t feel like a woman with her partner the chances of sex are slim. The same goes for men.

You will probably notice that many relationships you know have couples living in the wrong polarity. i.e. The woman is more like the man, and the man is weaker and more like the female.

  • These couples are more likely to have sexual problems.

Getting the polarity right in your relationship is sexually volcanic, this is why it works when we first meet, but then we stop doing what works, we wonder where the sex has gone and fear that maybe we are in the wrong relationship?

So if you have been fed the illusion that time equals loss of passion, then you are missing one of the fundamental laws of nature and that is polarity.

Opposites attract: It’s the differences that attract each other, nature has designed us to be different for good reason, but our fears help us to switch roles. Females get stronger when they become fearful and men become weaker in their quest to please their partners.

Once the man discovers his true masculine power, only then will he break through with her, helping her to feel safe to feel feminine again.

If you are a man wanting to know how to break through and claim back your true role in your relationship get in touch with Stephen Hedger Relationship Coach and Marriage expert today!

Or

Maybe you are female and you want your man to learn how to break through with you and keep you safe, so you can release the passion in you again?

How Do I Save My Marriage

Thousands of couples across the UK, full of fear for their future have one BIG question
“how do I save my marriage?”

No matter what’s happened in your relationship or your life your relationship can be saved if the right steps are taken.

Let me explain how this works.

Relationships do not just go wrong over night, it takes time and builds up in the minds of those who start to feel that something is wrong.

One of the problems people near break-up experience is that they have spent along time creating bad feelings and attaching those bad feelings to their partner and their relationship.

Many Couples Regret Their Divorce…

Whenever you focus on bad things or what’s wrong with your life consistently, what you end up with is a distorted view of what is really going on. This means your perception of reality in the context of your relationship is going to be very different from the actual reality.

This is why so many couples believe 100% that divorce is their only option and then end up regretting it.

Here is the good news

So when couples work with me to take a step back from their relationship what they discover is things are not as bad as they first thought.

They discover that they have both created feelings within themselves from a distorted perspective of their relationship. They have then judged their own thoughts and made their partner responsible for the thoughts they have created.

From this new perspective a couple can start to discover what was missing from their relationship. This new perception of their relationship changes their approach and puts them in a more resourceful state of self-discovery and openness rather than blame and resentment.

At this point where the foundations of their beliefs about their partner has been changed we can work to grow the knowledge within the couple to help them understand why they both felt so bad.

The reasons here could be infinite, it could be due to past experiences either from child hood or past relationships. There could be values set up to always equal failure for an individual and so depression is likely. It could be assumptions and misunderstandings have consistently caused conflict. It could be that one of you was just bored. This list is potentially endless, but in this list will be needs that one or both people in the relationship were missing that were critical to their happiness.

Missing needs

Once we have discovered the missing needs then growth starts to happen again as the couple gain a deeper understanding of how they got to where they are and why they behaved the way they did.

With a more sympathetic view of their relationship and the with their fears now on the back burner the couple are positioned to create a new commitment to each other from this new perspective of understanding.

  • This is the start of rebuilding the trust the couple needs to survive long-term.

The couple then receive help with the assumption that their will always be challenges in their relationship, but with the right understanding and a unified approach to their problems they have every chance of creating a passionate and lasting relationship.

Remember whatever you believe about your relationship today, it is only one perspective and if that comes from a state of fear or anger then it is guaranteed that any decision taken in this place will be a poor one that is likely to be regretted later.

Dating Marriage Separation Divorce Services

I was just having a spring clean of the typical relationship services I offer here in the UK.

If you are experiencing relationship problems Stephen Hedger has Relationship Clinics in Harley Street London, Aylesbury and Haddenham Buckinghamshire.

For an appointment or more information
call now on 0845 519 4808

He offers help, support, and advice on a full range of simple to complex relationship problems. Below is a list of common relationship problems you may have and the solutions that will be focused on during your sessions.

Break-ups

The problem: Dealing with break-ups can be a stressful and traumatic time. You may want to accelerate removing the pain of your break-up, or want to understand why it happened, or maybe you just want your ex-back.

The solution: Whatever you have experienced, the focus will be on helping you rebuild your life step-by-step specifically designed for your happiness. The focus will be on personal growth, confidence, self-esteem, and self-discovery to ensure this does not happen again and you have totally confidence in your future decisions.

Finding Mr or Mrs RIGHT

The problem: Are you struggling to find the right relationship for you? Do you find that you keep meeting the wrong people, or you find that your relationships keep ending and you don’t understand why.

The solution: You will discover how to attract the people who are the best fit for you, combined with understanding why past relationships have failed. This is a journey of self discovery when you learn how to connect with the real you. When someone becomes fearful of anything in their lives then they attract a totally different person than if they were confident and secure. The problem is fearful people are not aware of their fears and so feel fears as a normal way to live.

Relationship Problems

The problem: When persistent problems hit relationships and nothing you do seems to work, getting professional help fast is critical. As each day passes it’s another day of you both attaching insecure feelings to each other and that rocks the foundations of your trust. Without trust there is no relationship.

The solution: You will learn how to understand your problems and deal with them in a positive way with guidance on how to manage future problems, and what it takes to build passionate lasting relationships.

Igniting stale relationships

The Problem: Without realising your relationship can shift from magical passion to humdrum. You may love your partner, but you long for the days of passion, excitement and adventure. When real lives hit relationships the excitement that they felt with each other can fade and so they look for many other ways to fulfil their needs. This could be with friends, family, children, hobbies, work and even affairs.

The solution: You will discover what caused your initial excitement with each other and the steps to getting it back. We can be excited about new partner without knowing why and so when the passion goes we struggle to get it back. Because everyone agrees that over time the passion goes you then assume it’s normal. The reality is you have listened to more people who also don’t know how to keep the passion alive and more importantly what you’re doing to kill it.

One foot out of the door

The Problem: One of you may be feeling that ending the relationship is the only option. In some situations that could the right decision, however, 99% of the reasons the couple want to split, is because they don’t feel good around their partner and they have made their partner responsible for their feelings which they created without knowing.

The solution: If this is the case then the relationship can be saved and grown into the one the couple planned to have. You will discover where your relationship really is, because you’re likely to be seeing it as worse than it is.

Divorce Support

The problem: Divorce can be one of the most traumatic events in a person’s life. Coping with the break-up of a family combined with anger, resentment, lawyers and their cold approach. This can be a daunting and worrying time for anyone as your life seems to be out of your control.

The solution: You will receive support with coping with the divorce itself, and the steps needed to re-building your new life. You will discover how to build confidence, strength and self-esteem into your relationship with yourself so you can trust your decisions and understand with clarity what in your world will give you happiness.