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Stephen Hedger

Stephen Hedger

Crisis Marriage Coach | Harley Street London

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Hidden Dangers: The Problems People Don’t See Coming…

One of the most crucial relationship skills is the ability to predict what will happen next.

This is one of those skills that many think they have until it’s blatantly obvious they don’t.

Most people don’t have this skill because they are unaware of what is happening.

People who cannot predict what will happen in the moment, over the coming weeks and over years, are going to experience growing and more complex problems.

Sometimes, these problems are so hidden that a divorce request out of nowhere creates a traumatic shock – I have seen many of these cases where one person had no idea there was even a problem.

A person who loses their temper or rages at their partner will create a number of problems if this pattern persists.

The person who pleases their partner to get their needs met will be shocked it’s never worked in fact it’s made matters worse.

A person who withdraws emotionally from a relationship will find the end result isn’t the protection they want at all.

The man who decides to do it her way to keep the peace will find he is creating a slowly growing disconnecting upset in her.

The people who don’t understand how their sexual attraction works won’t be able to fix it or get it back.

Some people expect baby love from their partner, and they expect to be loved for no reason.

You see, these and many more distorted emotional patterns that people run will have short, medium and long-term effects on their relationships.

The problem is they have no idea what these effects are, so they keep doing them.

It’s like watching people running towards the edge of a cliff blindfolded.

For example, the wife becomes upset, and the husband leaves her alone because he knows she will eventually calm down.

He has no idea the problem he will now create in her over the next few years if this is his go-to pattern.

How about the wife who is constantly critical of her husband is removing his ability to succeed with her.

So he will either stay and give up who he is, he will leave her, or spend more time where he is valued.

That can be at work, with friends or with someone new.

At the point of a marital crisis, being able to predict what will happen next becomes even more important as the window of opportunity can close.

When a relationship is in crisis and on a knifes-edge, the next step is so important to learn.

One lady had decided to continue to rage at her husband because of his affair.

She felt justified; what she refused to see was he already had one foot out of the door.

Instead of spending time understanding why he decided to have an affair, her rages pushed him out the door.

She then raged because he left her.

Spending time with him, I learnt that her rages were what she did when he didn’t do things her way; it was her pattern.

He said she was very difficult to love, so he had to find love outside of the marriage.

At crisis point, many men become domesticated they are unaware they are bringing a practical solution to an emotional problem that will have little impact on her or how she sees him.

It’s like blowing up the tires when the car runs out of petrol and then being confused about why it doesn’t work.

Men and women are so confused by their problems they tend to make the problem worse in the quest to make it better.

Those who leave the marriage think the divorce has fixed the problem.

They are in for the next shock as their thinking has not highlighted that a divorce does not magically teach people how to be effective with their next partner.

Divorce is not an educator; all it creates is a legal divide.

The couples I help learn either why the marriage can work or why it can’t.

This level of certainty helps most people to reconnect this time correctly – there is a right and wrong way!

It also leaves a few to part amicably because now they both understand why.

This saved those couples years of heartache with each other.

Relationships are highly complex, so my clients demanded easy ways to predict how their actions will be received and how to get more out of themselves and be more effective with their partner.

They want a win-win solution.

When your whole life – family and finances are on the line, you must know what you are doing, or you may make it worse without meaning to.

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I’m not going to ask you how you “feel", pay me to watch you argue, or try to find the person to blame.

I am looking to discover if the couple can become a team, overcome their problems together and create a dynamic that will create a loving and passionate life together.

My approach is to take you from where you are, to where you want to be… fast!

I can not recommend Stephen highly enough – he not only saved our marriage, but has improved my marriage and myself as a person.

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Do You Want
To Save Your Marriage?

Hi, I'm Stephen Hedger. I'm determined to help couples discover what their marriage is capable of with the right information. My only question is, will it be yours?

Learn more

A 30 minute call with Stephen

In a short phone conversation, Stephen was able to quickly get to the heart of what the real issue was in our marriage – and why in almost a year of working on our marriage including 10 weeks of marriage counselling through a relationship therapy organisation, we weren’t really making any progress. I found Stephen to be extremely perceptive, as well as empathetic to our situation, while being able to quickly pinpoint the real sticking point in our marriage.
Many thanks
Olivia

Dear Stephen
Thank you for your time to listen to my experience in my marriage. You gave me encouragement to speak out to my partner in confidence. You made me realise that sometimes the way we make comments on each other can aggravate the situation and make it worse. Your advice made me feel revived.

Kind regards

Chipo

Success Stories

Marriage Crisis from Infidelity & Communication Breakdown

August 21, 2023 By Stephen Hedger

Today’s post is about a professional couple in the UK who decided they wanted to share their experience of their tailormade program that was designed to help them out of their marital challenges. They were in crisis due to communication breakdown and infidelity. They had 12 meetings over five months to learn how to reconnect […]

His marriage was over!

June 5, 2023 By Stephen Hedger

This man was in the depths of sadness, his marriage was over, but he didn’t want it to be. They had seen numerous counsellors who had all concluded the marriage was indeed over. He had lost all feelings for his wife. Due to being so stuck for so long, he had started an affair. But […]

Client responds to testimonial

November 11, 2021 By Stephen Hedger

I’m working with this lady, and during the session, she wanted to comment on a testimonial another client had left. As you go through today post, you will see what she wanted to say. Before you get to her words, I want to set the context. I’m not quoting her word for word here, but […]

“I was in tears…” 

October 20, 2021 By Stephen Hedger

‘Initially I went to Stephen with a sole focus on saving my marriage as my husband wanted a divorce whilst I felt I could not let go of the 14 years’ relationship without giving it a second chance. My husband was determined to exit and refused to join the Marriage Breakthrough Programme with me, therefore […]

“Lawyer saves relationship alone”!

July 27, 2021 By Stephen Hedger

“I went to see Stephen when my relationship was at breaking point. The final trigger was my partner’s plan to sell his property and move in with me. We had until then a long-distance relationship and never spent more than about a month together (thanks to the COVID lockdown). I had finally moved to his […]

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Hi, I'm Stephen Hedger. I'm determined to help couples discover what their marriage is capable of with the right information. My only question is, will it be yours?

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“Free Marriage in Crisis 8 Page Guide”:

Stephen Hedger is a marriage in crisis specialist sought after by CEO’s Bankers, Judges, GP’s, Business Leaders, A List Celebrities and Entrepreneurs Globally


Stephen says when you are in marital crisis it's important to know what to do to make sure your next steps don't make the situation even worse. This short guide written by Stephen is designed to help you take a step back and consider next steps intelligently.

 

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Stephen Hedger offers married couples in crisis across the globe a comprehensive strategic roadmap to overcome their marriage problems. Today Stephen works with Celebrities, CEO’s, Lawyers, Bankers, Royalty, Judges, and business owners helping them transform their family and personal relationships with massive breakthroughs, seemingly against all odds.

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Recent Posts

  • The Blame Game Trap!
  • “The Relationship Mirror Problem”
  • The Success Path for Failing Marriages
  • Marriage Crisis from Infidelity & Communication Breakdown
  • “Free your partner before they free themselves”

*Disclaimer:
Any testimonials stated on this page or on any pages on the Stephen Hedger Marriage Coach website/s are proof of our success, naturally, results may vary from person to person.

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