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Stephen Hedger

Stephen Hedger

Crisis Marriage Coach | Harley Street London

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“You are not broken”!

Most people that attend my sessions are in varying degrees of emotional stress, some are worried they are broken or there is something wrong with them.

In most cases there is nothing wrong with them, they are not broken or malfunctioning.

In fact quite the reverse, they are working perfectly.

You see the human body has created pain for a reason, it tells us when something is happening to us that will harm us.

Put your hand on a hot cooker your brain will want you to take it away to protect your hand.

What if emotional pain is the same?

What if the emotional pain a person is in is just another message that what you’re doing to yourself isn’t working so stop it and make a change.

If a person could see the way they are managing their own mind is the reason for their own pain and suffering, then they would see that pain would be the natural result of their own actions and thinking.

Then their perspective of that emotional pain would be the same as putting their hand on a hot cooker.

If I keep behaving this way I should expect pain.

If I am awful to my partner should I expect my partner to stay with me or go?

The problem is people don’t see this in life or relationships because they don’t take personal responsibility for what they are feeling they blame others.

It’s their partner fault is the common complaint I hear, but this is a disempowering belief remember at most your partner can only trigger you, your feelings are created by you.

So if you keep going round in the same circles of conflict and you know the result and how you will both feel in the end.

Why would you choose to put you hand on the hot cooker again and again?

Your mind and body keep telling you it’s painful yet there is no learning, so maybe you are mad, maybe you are broken or insane.

You see many people act like they are mad or broken, what’s really broken is their thinking and their beliefs.

Firstly what each person is suffering from is an inability of how to hear the message of pain as a message to change what you are doing to yourself.

And secondly they are missing what change they must make to replace that pain with other feelings such as joy.

If someone is emotionally out of control of themselves is it wise to become out of control as a mirror of them to fix that situation?

Then there is the other extreme where people can’t bear what they keep doing to themselves over and over so they divorce their partner to stop their own pain.

These people would not put their hand on a hot cooker and throw out the cooker to stop their pain they know that would be madness.

People who suffer are the ones that have not yet discovered how to build their thinking so their life keeps bringing them joy.

So if you are currently suffering this message is for you, you are not broken your mind and body is looking after you and it wants you to make a change within you.

Now the question is what change within you should I make to protect myself and bring myself joy instead?

Every person has an emotional system they are disconnected from and maybe now is the time you discovered what it is and how to use it to help yourself.

You see the moment you get off other peoples emotional systems and get on your own, your life will change.

  • About
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Stephen Hedger
Stephen Hedger
About the author:

Harley Street Expert | Founder & High Performance Coach

With two decades of experience helping couples out of crisis, Stephen the founder of The Marriage Breakthrough Program, uses his proven system for rescuing and rebuilding relationships on the edge of divorce. A trusted advisor to CEOs, entrepreneurs, and industry leaders globally, his work blends emotional intelligence with strategic clarity. Known for navigating highly complex relationship challenges, Stephen helps individuals and couples find clarity and direction when everything is at stake.

Find out more >>> The Marriage Breakthrough Program
Stephen Hedger
Latest posts by Stephen Hedger (see all)
  • Why You Love Each Other But Don’t Want Each Other - June 19, 2025
  • “Your Marriage is On FIRE” - June 17, 2025
  • What If Everything You’re Trying to Fix… Isn’t the Problem? - June 13, 2025

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"Working with Stephen was the most valuable 12 hours of my life. He gave me the tools to build a deeply loving, passionate relationship. His compassion, humour, and insight truly transformed me as a man."

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Recent Posts

  • Why You Love Each Other But Don’t Want Each Other
  • “Your Marriage is On FIRE”
  • What If Everything You’re Trying to Fix… Isn’t the Problem?
  • FREE Coaching: 5 Days to Clarity in Your Marriage
  • Helping Women Understand Their Husbands
  • What to Do When Your Marriage Is Failing — Real Answers That Work
  • Betrayed by an Affair: How to Survive Infidelity and Rebuild Your Marriage
  • Husbands May Only Become What She Believes Him to Be – Mini Post
  • “I feel nothing… and he’s no idea why!” – MiniPost
  • 7 Steps For a Successful Marriage Repair Process
  • Do You Know Your Values & Why They Are So Important?

Over 1300 Relationship Articles



Categories

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  • Communication (70)
  • Destructive Patterns (137)
  • Discussion (2)
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  • Loss of Love (43)
  • Loss of passion (35)
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I’m not going to ask you how you “feel", pay me to watch you argue, or try to find the person to blame.

I am looking to discover if the couple can become a team, overcome their problems together and create a dynamic that will create a loving and passionate life together.

My approach is to take you from where you are, to where you want to be… fast!

I can not recommend Stephen highly enough – he not only saved our marriage, but has improved my marriage and myself as a person.

Banker - London

Popular Posts

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  • I was in tears
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Do You Want
To Save Your Marriage?

Hi, I'm Stephen Hedger. I'm determined to help couples discover what their marriage is capable of with the right information. My only question is, will it be yours?

Learn more

A 30 minute call with Stephen

In a short phone conversation, Stephen was able to quickly get to the heart of what the real issue was in our marriage – and why in almost a year of working on our marriage including 10 weeks of marriage counselling through a relationship therapy organisation, we weren’t really making any progress. I found Stephen to be extremely perceptive, as well as empathetic to our situation, while being able to quickly pinpoint the real sticking point in our marriage.
Many thanks
Olivia

Dear Stephen
Thank you for your time to listen to my experience in my marriage. You gave me encouragement to speak out to my partner in confidence. You made me realise that sometimes the way we make comments on each other can aggravate the situation and make it worse. Your advice made me feel revived.

Kind regards

Chipo

Success Stories

From Battlefield to Breakthrough: How to Save Your Marriage Without a Toxic Fight.

January 31, 2025 By Stephen Hedger

Most people who come to me for help believe their marriage is broken, so their level of hope is not high. Many will have tried to fix the problems without success. These people are unaware that there is a critical mindset shift: if you don’t make it, your chances of success dramatically drop. As you […]

“By changing yourself, you can change a relationship… because I did!”

September 16, 2024 By Stephen Hedger

We were in the process of physical separation, with my husband arranging to move out at the end of the month, and I was getting legal advice on proceeding with the divorce.  On one of those distressed and sleepless nights, I came across Stephen’s website and his blog. I was fascinated. What Stephen has written […]

“There’s no hope in hell – I want a divorce!”

April 22, 2024 By Stephen Hedger

So what do you do when the trust is broken so badly that their relationship ends with them selling their family home and moving into separate homes? Most people would consider this the end, but this gentleman decided something different. He wrote to me to see if I could help. I wanted to encourage his […]

Marriage Crisis from Infidelity & Communication Breakdown

August 21, 2023 By Stephen Hedger

Today’s post is about a professional couple in the UK who decided they wanted to share their experience of their tailormade program that was designed to help them out of their marital challenges. They were in crisis due to communication breakdown and infidelity. They had 12 meetings over five months to learn how to reconnect […]

His Marriage was Over!

June 5, 2023 By Stephen Hedger

This man was in the depths of sadness; his marriage was over, but he didn’t want it to be. They had seen numerous counsellors who had all concluded the marriage was indeed over. He had lost all feelings for his wife. Due to being so stuck for so long, he had started an affair. But […]

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Recent Clients: Scotland, Ireland, Texas, New York, Dubai, Los Angeles, Austrailia, Japan, Germany, France, Ireland, UK, Monaco to name a few.

Stephen Hedger offers married couples in crisis across the globe a comprehensive strategic roadmap to overcome their marriage problems.

Today Stephen works with Celebrities, CEO’s, Lawyers, Bankers, Royalty, Judges, and business owners helping them transform their family and personal relationships with massive breakthroughs, seemingly against all odds.

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Recent Posts

  • Why You Love Each Other But Don’t Want Each Other
  • “Your Marriage is On FIRE”
  • What If Everything You’re Trying to Fix… Isn’t the Problem?
  • FREE Coaching: 5 Days to Clarity in Your Marriage
  • Helping Women Understand Their Husbands

*Disclaimer:
Any testimonials stated on this page or on any pages on the Stephen Hedger Marriage Coach website/s are proof of our success, naturally, results may vary from person to person.

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