If you could choose to live your dream life would you choose to have a go?
Before you start reading this post this isn’t a quest for how do we get lots of money it’s about something far more powerful.
It’s about creating a vision and turning that vision into reality, it’s also about integrating that vision into a couples life together to make them stronger.
It’s another tool for couples wanting to creating a bulletproof connection.
Is there money involved yes, but the driver or focus isn’t the money it’s the vision and the design.
I see enough very wealthy people who are not happy at all, so money isn’t the key to anyone’s happiness.
The problem with this concept of going for a dream life is many people either don’t try, or they give up far too soon, or they simply don’t have clarity of what the dream is.
Plus the moment you share a dream with others there will be queues of people ready to kill your dream, even a persons own family can try to put them off going for it.
Which is harder?
So you can give up your dream(s) and settle, but which is harder going for your goals or letting those dreams go?
Most people are unaware that success is usually 25% mechanics and 75% attitude and mindset.
So if the mindset is wrong the challenge isn’t will I be successful.
The challenge is…
How will I ever become successful in a fearful mindset listening to others who gave-up their dreams years ago?
I discovered something really interesting
I too used to think success only happened to other people.
The lucky ones, the ones who knew the right people, or the ones who already had family backing, but I discovered something that grabbed my attention.
I discover life design by accident.
Life design first came into crystal focus when I was told a story about a university that had done a social study on all it’s students.
From memory I think it was 30 years later they reinterviewed the same students.
One discovery in the study really stood out.
Only 3% of the students were planning their financial future.
30 years later they discovered that 3% now earned more than the other 97% put together! Yes, put together!
Reading this story blew my mind not just about finances, but about the power of focus and designing a compelling life.
Money wasn’t the key to happiness – Our shared vision was the key
I realised that by understanding what I really wanted I could then put together a plan to achieve those goals.
This way I’m stacking the odds in my favour.
Creating a shared vision was one of my first discussions with Cloe.
I wanted us to get excited about building a life we would both be excited by.
One of the keys to a bulletproof relationship is to share a joint purpose and vision, you’ll never get bored as you’ll always have a purpose.
Multi-level Joint Visions
So if the couple can grow together, plan excitement, plan their freedom, plan their fun, plan their sexual connection and love.
“Planning your sex lives how unromantic?!” One lady said that in a session.ššš
I said, “What is a honeymoon if it isn’t a few weeks of planned sex”. š
Please note: Far too many couples are not planning the effectiveness of their connection and are not planning what they are going to do with it.
Too many couples miss this point become mums and dads and live that way together then wonder why they are hitting crisis when the kids leave home.
Husband and wife and lovers died years ago and no one noticed.
If you don’t plan where you are going it’s like any journey you will get lost and frustrated with each other.
The key is you both having a shared vision
Then they have the power to plan the steps of how they will get the life they want together.
- What do you both want? Are you on the same page with the next 5, 10, 20 years?
- What plan would excite you both?
- What does it need to contain?
- Are you on the same page with what equals a compelling life?
- Are you really a good team?
- Are you dreaming about having more of what you both love?
- Are you planning to be free on some level?
The fun part of my job with couples and individuals is helping them understand the process of grasping a future that excites both people.
One they would both be excited to live in.
I’ll leave you with this story.
A Marriage Counsellor came to see me with her husband.
She said firstly she was so embarrassed to be seeking help, but she was totally stuck with what to do.
She told me she married her husband 9Ā½ years ago.
She told him that she wanted to move to America it was her dream and was a condition of their marriage.
I could see the problem, but I asked her anyway.
“The problem is we are still here in England”!!! She really wasn’t happy.
So I turned to the husband and said ” did you agree to go to America?”
He said, “Yes, I did agree, but to be honest I didn’t think she was serious and I really don’t want to go, I like England”.
Imagine if they started the process of immigration the moment they got engaged their outcome would have been very different.
It’s so important to share the vision and then quickly make the plans/steps together to ensure the vision can be turned into reality.
I tested this planning thing many years ago and got really detailed with what I wanted.
It was a 5 year plan.
I was totally shocked that by bringing it into focus planning the steps I actually completed the plan in just 18 months.