Love tip of the day: How does love happen?

If you want to feel love, then you have to give it! As soon as someone in a couple pulls love away the problems start.

You see, love only happens when we give it. Most people are under the illusion that people give us love. What actually happens is we translate their words or actions into a feeling. If we agree their action equals love to us, we then feel safe to give them a loving action back.

  • It is at the point we give love back is the point when our love is felt.

Your partner does not have magical powers to make you have a feeling, we create all our own feelings based on our reactions to others. We all know this is true because in past relationships we know we started to feel that something was wrong. So if our partners at that time tried to give us love, unless we agree it feels like love we wouldn’t give it back. The result was we didn’t feel love no matter how much they say they loved us.

So PLEASE don’t pull love away to punish your partner especially if you want to keep your relationship. It kills the relationship and puts you in a values conflict with you that bit-by-bit feels awful.

My advice don’t live in reaction, don’t wait to get love, if you want to feel love, GIVE IT!

Test it for yourself, go out to today and give a small act of love or kindness to everyone you meet and watch how you feel.

Better still, give love today to everyone, come back and tell us what happens in comments below.

About Stephen Hedger

International relationship expert Stephen Hedger's philosophy on relationship problems is this: Couples fail to understand their relationships because they are too focused on their problems and so they totally miss what created them. Stephen's approach is a refreshing and enlightening journey that helps couples uncover their truth. His strategies uncover the knowledge that all couples need to create a successful and lasting passionate connection. If you are in crisis and you need help, book an initial consultation today to get your life back on track.