When two people make a promise to love each other forever, and in many cases for better or for worse, the shock of a break up is like being hit by a train and plunged into darkness.
Even those who know the relationship has not been working are totally devastated when reality strikes and their partner just gives up and leaves.
You still love them, but you hate them too, you want them back, but you don’t.
The future you had hoped for is ripped from you, and you are plunged into massive uncertainty that is so scary that you can feel a shift in you, you didn’t think was humanly possible.
Of course everyone reacts differently, but these are just some of the powerful emotions that a break up causes, add children into the mix and the fall out can be massively magnified, although children can help to keep the sanity as their survival becomes more critical than your own.
Most of us know how painful break ups can be, but for some the break up can be so powerful that they feel some how stuck, sometimes for years. They want to move their life forward, but they don’t know how. They have thoughts that swing from maybe their partner was always wrong for them, to not being able to see a future without them, no matter what they have done. Plus to add to the confusion the thoughts and feelings change every day.
It’s like logic is saying one thing, but the feelings do not match, and the feelings seem to win the battle every time.
Some may think that the partner that left them was their only chance for love, in this place they can do almost anything to get their partner back, resulting in them disrespecting themselves further confirming their lack of self worth and pushing them further in to depressive states.
The depression, lack of certainty, lack of love, lack of self worth all works together to knock out all self-esteem and confidence to cope with the world, let alone re-building a life and finding love again.
People who experience these emotions stop telling their friends how they are really feeling, because they have heard the story 100 times and their response is always the same, “…you’ll meet someone better, all you have to do is move on”.
The problem is it’s like telling a clinically depressed person to just cheer up, it won’t work.
So the result can be further isolation as they have no one to turn to.
So where are you today?
- Are you in this place and you would like help now?
- Do you have a friend whom you are worried about?
- Are you in a relationship, and you fear a breakup?
- Would you like to find out more about how I help people recover from breakup trauma?
Please feel free to comment below about your experiences or take action today and find out how I can help by Clicking Here.
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