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Stephen Hedger

Stephen Hedger

Crisis Marriage Coach | Harley Street London

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The most common problem leading couples to divorce!

I sit at the sharp end of marital crisis every day. I see first hand what everyone is doing that’s leading them to divorce.

Far too many have no idea they are on this disastrous path until it’s too late.

Everyone comes in to see me with different problems affairs, loss of passion, loss of trust, money issues, loss of love and emotional connection, to name a few.

Every couple I see no matter what symptom they bring has this problem.

To understand this problem properly, we need to understand there is a global problem that most people suffer from.

They are influenced by a fear they are not enough, and they won’t be loved. The feeling is devastating for so many people.

So when a couple starts to practice behaviours that take their relationship to this place of not feeling they are enough, self-protection behaviours can start to cause a disconnect.

Self-protection kills love and passion so it’s critical to understand how to avoid getting into this problem.

This next sentence is important!

Every single couple I see has made something more important than their partner in their partners’ mind and when this happens, relationship problems are never far away.

The important part of that sentence is “….in your partner mind.”

Many people feel they are putting their partner first, but the reality is their partner thinks they are not a priority so end up feeling insignificant and alone in the marriage.

What they think is critical to understand because it’s what they think and feel is what tells them it’s time to leave the relationship.

This is why understanding your partners’ world is so critical to learn if you want the relationship to survive.

What could be insignificant to one person might be the most important thing to the other.

People who have committed their lives to their marriage and their partner need to feel loved unconditionally.

Very few feel this and so they protect themselves from the relationship. They withhold their own love from their partner, and they meet their needs outside the relationship.

How many people feel insignificant in their relationship and so get their needs met through their work or their children?

Couples get themselves into crisis because they are totally unaware of the small things they are doing or not doing that can build up to a massive problem.

So many couples are suffering because they have no idea how their partner thinks differently to them and so translate their partner behaviours in a way that means they must protect themselves from them.

This creates a devastating ping-pong effect of two people making the point of being together irrelevant, but neither person is aware of what they are doing.

Divorce is never something a couple designs. The root of divorce for far too many people sits in a total lack of understanding of their partner world so…

  • People stop loving and start judging.
  • People start protecting themselves from a partner who is trying to love them but in their own way.

The key to understating is learning.

When couples come to see me, I share that I’m not trying to fix their marriage. They are the ones that do that. What I teach is what they must know and do to protect their relationship from so many hidden problems most couples experience.

I have the brightest people come in for help and they really had no idea what they needed to know to keep a marriage alive for life.

The problem so many couples face is they have waited until disaster hits before they seek help.

That means they now need a strategy of learning that can help them discover what they must now do.

For some, the relationship was right to end, but for many, their disconnect is down to lack of understanding on both sides.

Make 2020 the year the suffering stops, every day is far too valuable to waste.

 

 

 

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Stephen Hedger
Stephen Hedger
About the author:

Harley Street Expert | Founder & High Performance Coach

With two decades of experience helping couples out of crisis, Stephen the founder of The Marriage Breakthrough Program, uses his proven system for rescuing and rebuilding relationships on the edge of divorce. A trusted advisor to CEOs, entrepreneurs, and industry leaders globally, his work blends emotional intelligence with strategic clarity. Known for navigating highly complex relationship challenges, Stephen helps individuals and couples find clarity and direction when everything is at stake.

Click to find out more >>> The Marriage Breakthrough Program
Stephen Hedger
Latest posts by Stephen Hedger (see all)
  • Loss of Love? How to Save Your Relationship - June 26, 2025
  • Passionless Marriage: “Sex life dying – want to know why?” - June 26, 2025
  • Coping with an Affair: How to Rebuild Trust and Save Your Marriage - June 26, 2025

Category iconSeparation & Divorce,  Uncategorized

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Recent Posts

  • Your Marriage Isn’t Broken — The Pattern Is. Here’s How to Fix It.
  • The 5C Marriage Blueprint: The Foundation Every Relationship Needs to Thrive
  • The Silent Killer of Marriages: When You Stop Being You
  • Emotional Intimacy in Marriage: The Key to Trust, Connection, and Lasting Passion
  • Please Save Our Marriage – My Wife has Asked for a Divorce
  • Loss of Love? How to Save Your Relationship
  • Passionless Marriage: “Sex life dying – want to know why?”
  • Coping with an Affair: How to Rebuild Trust and Save Your Marriage
  • Feeling Torn Between Two Relationships?
  • How to Help Spouse Heal After Affair?
  • How to Rebuild Emotional Safety (Without Needing Them to Go First)

Over 1300 Relationship Articles



Categories

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Primary Sidebar

I’m not going to ask you how you “feel", pay me to watch you argue, or try to find the person to blame.

I am looking to discover if the couple can become a team, overcome their problems together and create a dynamic that will create a loving and passionate life together.

My approach is to take you from where you are, to where you want to be… fast!

I can not recommend Stephen highly enough – he not only saved our marriage, but has improved my marriage and myself as a person.

Banker - London

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Do You Want
To Save Your Marriage?

Hi, I'm Stephen Hedger. I'm determined to help couples discover what their marriage is capable of with the right information. My only question is, will it be yours?

Learn more

A 30 minute call with Stephen

In a short phone conversation, Stephen was able to quickly get to the heart of what the real issue was in our marriage – and why in almost a year of working on our marriage including 10 weeks of marriage counselling through a relationship therapy organisation, we weren’t really making any progress. I found Stephen to be extremely perceptive, as well as empathetic to our situation, while being able to quickly pinpoint the real sticking point in our marriage.
Many thanks
Olivia

Dear Stephen
Thank you for your time to listen to my experience in my marriage. You gave me encouragement to speak out to my partner in confidence. You made me realise that sometimes the way we make comments on each other can aggravate the situation and make it worse. Your advice made me feel revived.

Kind regards

Chipo

Success Stories

From Battlefield to Breakthrough: How to Save Your Marriage Without a Toxic Fight.

January 31, 2025 By Stephen Hedger

Most people who come to me for help believe their marriage is broken, so their level of hope is not high. Many will have tried to fix the problems without success. These people are unaware that there is a critical mindset shift: if you don’t make it, your chances of success dramatically drop. As you […]

“By changing yourself, you can change a relationship… because I did!”

September 16, 2024 By Stephen Hedger

We were in the process of physical separation, with my husband arranging to move out at the end of the month, and I was getting legal advice on proceeding with the divorce.  On one of those distressed and sleepless nights, I came across Stephen’s website and his blog. I was fascinated. What Stephen has written […]

“There’s no hope in hell – I want a divorce!”

April 22, 2024 By Stephen Hedger

So what do you do when the trust is broken so badly that their relationship ends with them selling their family home and moving into separate homes? Most people would consider this the end, but this gentleman decided something different. He wrote to me to see if I could help. I wanted to encourage his […]

Marriage Crisis from Infidelity & Communication Breakdown

August 21, 2023 By Stephen Hedger

Today’s post is about a professional couple in the UK who decided they wanted to share their experience of their tailormade program that was designed to help them out of their marital challenges. They were in crisis due to communication breakdown and infidelity. They had 12 meetings over five months to learn how to reconnect […]

His Marriage was Over!

June 5, 2023 By Stephen Hedger

This man was in the depths of sadness; his marriage was over, but he didn’t want it to be. They had seen numerous counsellors who had all concluded the marriage was indeed over. He had lost all feelings for his wife. Due to being so stuck for so long, he had started an affair. But […]

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Head Office
10 Harley Street
London
W1G 9PF
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Recent Clients: Scotland, Ireland, Texas, New York, Dubai, Los Angeles, Austrailia, Japan, Germany, France, Ireland, UK, Monaco to name a few.

Stephen Hedger offers married couples in crisis across the globe a comprehensive strategic roadmap to overcome their marriage problems.

Today Stephen works with Celebrities, CEO’s, Lawyers, Bankers, Royalty, Judges, and business owners helping them transform their family and personal relationships with massive breakthroughs, seemingly against all odds.

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Recent Posts

  • Your Marriage Isn’t Broken — The Pattern Is. Here’s How to Fix It.
  • The 5C Marriage Blueprint: The Foundation Every Relationship Needs to Thrive
  • The Silent Killer of Marriages: When You Stop Being You
  • Emotional Intimacy in Marriage: The Key to Trust, Connection, and Lasting Passion
  • Please Save Our Marriage – My Wife has Asked for a Divorce

*Disclaimer:
Any testimonials stated on this page or on any pages on the Stephen Hedger Marriage Coach website/s are proof of our success, naturally, results may vary from person to person.

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