• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer

New Clients: +44 (0)845 519 4808

Existing Clients +44 (0)20 3793 2829

Stephen Hedger

Stephen Hedger

Crisis Marriage Coach | Harley Street London

  • Marriage Breakthrough Program
    • FAQ
  • About
  • Clients Success Stories
  • Blog
    • Marriage Blueprint
    • Saving a Marriage Alone
    • Communication problems
    • Infidelity
    • Loss of Love
    • Loss of Passion
    • Separation Divorce

The Warrior & The Princess

When couples don’t understand that the other person cannot see the world the same as they do, they assume the other is being difficult, mean or uncaring.

Below is a story that depicts a lot of the frustration many couples feel. This story is, one type of dynamic there are of course many.

So below may not be your dynamic, but it illustrates the gap in understanding that everyone is having.

When the warrior first meets and falls for the princess, he marvels at her beauty.

He stands by her side, looking after her, protecting her and loving her. 

Full of his Love, the princess connects with his powerful presence, honesty and strength. 

She looks into his eyes and sees the future clearly, a wonderful life is possible with a warrior like this, she feels. 

She knows this man loves her, and she can see he will become a great man, so her future looks complete and secure.

So the princess gives herself to the warrior, and they agree to spend their life together. 

Every day the warrior goes into battle, his mission is to protect his family.

She loves and nurtures her new family, she is absorbed in her new role. 

She is no longer just a princess, she is now a mother and lover too.

Her time is busy with loving her children, and he is out fighting battles to keep them safe, but an important change has happened, and they have not noticed.

He comes home exhausted from another battle, she too is exhausted from caring for her family on her own. 

As he sits to relax and gets rid of his day he looks for food and desires her.

Today she rejects him.

The warrior and the princess have started to change, she keeps feeling unsettled, and she feels he is not present for her even when he is there. 

So she feels disconnected from him, which scares her, so she goes to him as she is craving a connection with him.

The way she does this is she shares all her worries even those about him. 

To the warrior, these matters are small and irrelevant, especially when compared to the battles he faces every day. 

So he tells her to forget her woes, and he tries to desire her again; she is now furious as he dismisses her feelings.

Full of anger, she rejects him again. 

She now looks at how she used to feel when they first met and how she feels today, she prods him and provokes him to notice her and connect with her. 

She wants him to see how she feels, and the pain she is in due to the growing disconnect. Can he not see what’s happening to her?

The warrior becomes tired of her attacks and negativity, his patience is wearing thin. 

He starts to become aware that another war is starting, but this one is in his own home, all he wants is a simple life, and he wants peace.

In this war, he feels powerless because no matter what he does, he struggles to win the battle, and in a rage, he pulls his sword on his princess to shut her down.

This sends shock waves through her, and now she has a new feeling, she is now scared of the warrior she loves. 

This was a feeling she never expected, and now in extreme pain, she moves to protect herself from him.

The cycle continues, and eventually, she copes by emotionally numbing herself and putting up a wall of protection to keep herself safe.

Now her focus has changed, she can no longer go to the warrior she loves, in fact, now he has stopped being the warrior for her. She sees him as selfish, weak and a bully.

He sees her as mean negative always complaining, he can do nothing right!

So she feels alone and scared, and from time to time her fears show up to test the warrior. 

She hopes he will wake up to her pain, but he never does.

He’s growing tired of all the emotion as he looks at a past that used to be full of fun.

He starts to see that pulling his sword on her does make her quiet, but it’s not the way he wants it to be.

He seems happy now she is calm, but he doesn’t see her truth.

She may now be quiet, but she is becoming detached, getting Love from her children.

He feels successful in battle, so he spends more of his time where he feels good, and that’s not with her anymore.

In fact, now he rarely comes home.

This is a common story I see every day. 

Couples don’t understand each other, so they pick up their weapons and shields to solve their problems, and it never works.

What works is changing the couple’s thinking to one that understands the reality of what they are dealing with.

Attacking, and defending – none of these are relationship-building models.

Couples need solid foundations for growing their connection, but the knowledge they need will never just descend because relationships are highly complex with many moving parts.

My clients want simple ways to deal with complex problems so both people can win.

  • About
  • Latest Posts
Stephen Hedger
Stephen Hedger
About the author:

Harley Street Expert | Founder & High Performance Coach

With two decades of experience helping couples out of crisis, Stephen the founder of The Marriage Breakthrough Program, uses his proven system for rescuing and rebuilding relationships on the edge of divorce. A trusted advisor to CEOs, entrepreneurs, and industry leaders globally, his work blends emotional intelligence with strategic clarity. Known for navigating highly complex relationship challenges, Stephen helps individuals and couples find clarity and direction when everything is at stake.

Find out more >>> The Marriage Breakthrough Program
Stephen Hedger
Latest posts by Stephen Hedger (see all)
  • Your Marriage Isn’t Broken — The Pattern Is. Here’s How to Fix It. - July 2, 2025
  • The 5C Marriage Blueprint: The Foundation Every Relationship Needs to Thrive - July 1, 2025
  • The Silent Killer of Marriages: When You Stop Being You - June 30, 2025

Category iconMarriage Coaching

The Marriage Breakthrough

"Follow simple yet powerful steps designed to save and reignite a marriage fast no matter what has happened"
Or call us now on 0845 519 4808
"Click to Claim Your FREE Consultation Now!"

Recent Posts

  • Your Marriage Isn’t Broken — The Pattern Is. Here’s How to Fix It.
  • The 5C Marriage Blueprint: The Foundation Every Relationship Needs to Thrive
  • The Silent Killer of Marriages: When You Stop Being You
  • Emotional Intimacy in Marriage: The Key to Trust, Connection, and Lasting Passion
  • Please Save Our Marriage – My Wife has Asked for a Divorce
  • Loss of Love? How to Save Your Relationship
  • Passionless Marriage: “Sex life dying – want to know why?”
  • Coping with an Affair: How to Rebuild Trust and Save Your Marriage
  • Feeling Torn Between Two Relationships?
  • How to Help Spouse Heal After Affair?
  • How to Rebuild Emotional Safety (Without Needing Them to Go First)

Over 1300 Relationship Articles



Categories

  • 5C Marriage Blueprint (3)
  • A thought for Sunday (29)
  • Case Studies (2)
  • Communication (71)
  • Destructive Patterns (138)
  • Discussion (2)
  • Infidelity-Affairs (42)
  • Loss of Love (44)
  • Loss of passion (34)
  • Lost Attraction (22)
  • Marriage Coaching (443)
  • Marriage Mastery Assessment (1)
  • Masculine & Feminine (10)
  • Mini Posts (3)
  • Monday Breakthrough (2)
  • Personal Development (106)
  • Rebuilding trust (39)
  • Relationship Stories (25)
  • Retirement Crisis (6)
  • Save Marriage Alone (44)
  • Separation & Divorce (34)
  • Stop & Never – Mini Posts (54)
  • Stuck (9)
  • Testimonials (59)
  • Top 10 Popular Posts (12)
  • Uncategorized (750)

Primary Sidebar

I’m not going to ask you how you “feel", pay me to watch you argue, or try to find the person to blame.

I am looking to discover if the couple can become a team, overcome their problems together and create a dynamic that will create a loving and passionate life together.

My approach is to take you from where you are, to where you want to be… fast!

I can not recommend Stephen highly enough – he not only saved our marriage, but has improved my marriage and myself as a person.

Banker - London

Popular Posts

  • Women are struggling, but men don’t understand why
  • Built an Empire and lost a Family
  • Marriage in Limbo
  • Rebuilding Connection & Trust
  • Divorce Regret
  • Divorce Prevention
  • Resentment Stacking
  • 36 Principles For Success
  • My Wife is Aggressive
  • A Wise Old Man's Decision
  • I was in tears
  • Tourtured by the past

Do You Want
To Save Your Marriage?

Hi, I'm Stephen Hedger. I'm determined to help couples discover what their marriage is capable of with the right information. My only question is, will it be yours?

Learn more

A 30 minute call with Stephen

In a short phone conversation, Stephen was able to quickly get to the heart of what the real issue was in our marriage – and why in almost a year of working on our marriage including 10 weeks of marriage counselling through a relationship therapy organisation, we weren’t really making any progress. I found Stephen to be extremely perceptive, as well as empathetic to our situation, while being able to quickly pinpoint the real sticking point in our marriage.
Many thanks
Olivia

Dear Stephen
Thank you for your time to listen to my experience in my marriage. You gave me encouragement to speak out to my partner in confidence. You made me realise that sometimes the way we make comments on each other can aggravate the situation and make it worse. Your advice made me feel revived.

Kind regards

Chipo

Success Stories

From Battlefield to Breakthrough: How to Save Your Marriage Without a Toxic Fight.

January 31, 2025 By Stephen Hedger

Most people who come to me for help believe their marriage is broken, so their level of hope is not high. Many will have tried to fix the problems without success. These people are unaware that there is a critical mindset shift: if you don’t make it, your chances of success dramatically drop. As you […]

“By changing yourself, you can change a relationship… because I did!”

September 16, 2024 By Stephen Hedger

We were in the process of physical separation, with my husband arranging to move out at the end of the month, and I was getting legal advice on proceeding with the divorce.  On one of those distressed and sleepless nights, I came across Stephen’s website and his blog. I was fascinated. What Stephen has written […]

“There’s no hope in hell – I want a divorce!”

April 22, 2024 By Stephen Hedger

So what do you do when the trust is broken so badly that their relationship ends with them selling their family home and moving into separate homes? Most people would consider this the end, but this gentleman decided something different. He wrote to me to see if I could help. I wanted to encourage his […]

Marriage Crisis from Infidelity & Communication Breakdown

August 21, 2023 By Stephen Hedger

Today’s post is about a professional couple in the UK who decided they wanted to share their experience of their tailormade program that was designed to help them out of their marital challenges. They were in crisis due to communication breakdown and infidelity. They had 12 meetings over five months to learn how to reconnect […]

His Marriage was Over!

June 5, 2023 By Stephen Hedger

This man was in the depths of sadness; his marriage was over, but he didn’t want it to be. They had seen numerous counsellors who had all concluded the marriage was indeed over. He had lost all feelings for his wife. Due to being so stuck for so long, he had started an affair. But […]

Footer

Expert Help Available Worldwide via Zoom

For assistance from Stephen, contact his team at:

📞 +44 (0)845 519 4808



Head Office
10 Harley Street
London
W1G 9PF
United Kingdom



Recent Clients: Scotland, Ireland, Texas, New York, Dubai, Los Angeles, Austrailia, Japan, Germany, France, Ireland, UK, Monaco to name a few.

Stephen Hedger offers married couples in crisis across the globe a comprehensive strategic roadmap to overcome their marriage problems.

Today Stephen works with Celebrities, CEO’s, Lawyers, Bankers, Royalty, Judges, and business owners helping them transform their family and personal relationships with massive breakthroughs, seemingly against all odds.

  • Marriage Counselling Alternative
  • Cloe Hedger (Stephen’s wife)
  • Marriage Breakthrough Program
  • Individual Coaching
  • About
  • Clients Success Stories
  • Explore 1,300+ FREE life changing articles
  • FREE Marriage in Crisis Guide
  • FAQs
  • Private Diagnostic Marriage Assessment

Recent Posts

  • Your Marriage Isn’t Broken — The Pattern Is. Here’s How to Fix It.
  • The 5C Marriage Blueprint: The Foundation Every Relationship Needs to Thrive
  • The Silent Killer of Marriages: When You Stop Being You
  • Emotional Intimacy in Marriage: The Key to Trust, Connection, and Lasting Passion
  • Please Save Our Marriage – My Wife has Asked for a Divorce

*Disclaimer:
Any testimonials stated on this page or on any pages on the Stephen Hedger Marriage Coach website/s are proof of our success, naturally, results may vary from person to person.

Apply For Help Here Now...

Terms & Privacy Policy      Copyright © 2025 StephenHedger.com. All rights reserved. Company No.08279028    Return to top