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Stephen Hedger

Stephen Hedger

Crisis Marriage Coach | Harley Street London

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This couple did what many couples do. They created a loveless marriage!

I asked a couple in a session recently how much time they had both spent on their careers. I then asked them how much time they had spent on their children.

As you can imagine they were hard working caring parents so they both agreed they had spent significant time in both those key areas.

I then asked them how much time they had spend on their relationship. We came to an honest answer of “not very much”, this was due to life being so busy.

I agreed that modern life was busy.

This couple had come for help because their relationship had died and they were at the point of divorce, but they were aware of the dramatic impact a divorce would have on their children. So they wanted to see if it was possible to create a dynamic that could work with professional help.

I asked them how their broken relationship had affected their lives. They both shared how unhappy they had both been and how it really had affected everything.

Their work had suffered, the children had become unhappy and increasingly naughty.

I then asked them to imagine the effort in time they had spent on their relationship. I then asked them to imagine the impact if that same level of effort was transferred to their careers and their children. What would happen to the children and their careers.

Both people agreed that was unthinkable, they would almost certainly get fired from work and the children would be severely neglected.

What this couple started to see was they had severely neglected their relationship and by neglecting this key area of their life the other key areas were being affected negatively as a result.

As we talked we discovered that this couple didn’t know how to be successful with each other and so they had naturally gone to areas of life that were easy to be successful in.

This couple were intelligent, smart, caring, lovely people, but they were missing the knowledge of how to create a successful relationship for life and so they weren’t able to safely guide themselves and their own children.

So rather than both agreeing that what they were doing wasn’t working and seeking the right knowledge they ignored the problem and hoped it would sort itself out.They did from time-to-time try to talk, but just when they thought they had got through to each other they were both seeing how little they both really understood about each other.

They had successfully created a loveless marriage.

When a couple ignores their reality it is only a matter of time before something happens and their reality wakes the couple up.

This can be an affair, loss of love, detachment, to name a few.

This couple had destroyed their family by not making their relationship one of the most important part of their lives.

As a result the relationship was starved of the food it needed to survive.

The problem was this couple really didn’t understand the consequences of their actions, or lack of them. They had blamed each other and their busy lives.

These people were lovely people and yet without knowing they were hurting their own family and the future of every person in it.

Thankfully they wanted to learn where they had gone wrong and were committed to learn what was actually possible.

For this couple we discussed what was critical for them to learn and together we formulated a plan that would cover the main topics that were important to both of them and the topics they were both unaware of that were also impacting them both.

With a clear plan in place the couple were confident they would able to track their progress towards the goal they had both created.

They were not trying to blindly fix the relationship at all costs. They wanted the relationship to work naturally because that was the only way it could last.

This couple had now understood the importance of making their relationship the most important part of their lives. They realised that unless they learnt how to become effective partners in their marriage they were only really married on paper.

They realised that to guide their children to learn how to have a successful marriage they had to show them how.

They discovered that being married is not something that will magically happen. It takes skills we are not naturally born with. They discovered it takes skills to really understand each other and build a safe connected life and future.

All couples have the ability to learn and so they can learn these skills it they want to.

Personally when I started this journey of understanding relationships I knew I didn’t want to look back on my life and regret not doing all I can for myself and those I love.

Many of my clients share that view, they too don’t want to live a life they will regret.

This is why I encourage all couples if your relationship is failing a divorce is not the only solution. Just because you don’t have the answers it doesn’t mean they don’t exist.

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I’m not going to ask you how you “feel", pay me to watch you argue, or try to find the person to blame.

I am looking to discover if the couple can become a team, overcome their problems together and create a dynamic that will create a loving and passionate life together.

My approach is to take you from where you are, to where you want to be… fast!

I can not recommend Stephen highly enough – he not only saved our marriage, but has improved my marriage and myself as a person.

Banker - London

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Do You Want
To Save Your Marriage?

Hi, I'm Stephen Hedger. I'm determined to help couples discover what their marriage is capable of with the right information. My only question is, will it be yours?

Learn more

A 30 minute call with Stephen

In a short phone conversation, Stephen was able to quickly get to the heart of what the real issue was in our marriage – and why in almost a year of working on our marriage including 10 weeks of marriage counselling through a relationship therapy organisation, we weren’t really making any progress. I found Stephen to be extremely perceptive, as well as empathetic to our situation, while being able to quickly pinpoint the real sticking point in our marriage.
Many thanks
Olivia

Dear Stephen
Thank you for your time to listen to my experience in my marriage. You gave me encouragement to speak out to my partner in confidence. You made me realise that sometimes the way we make comments on each other can aggravate the situation and make it worse. Your advice made me feel revived.

Kind regards

Chipo

Success Stories

Client responds to testimonial

November 11, 2021 By Stephen Hedger

I’m working with this lady, and during the session, she wanted to comment on a testimonial another client had left. As you go through today post, you will see what she wanted to say. Before you get to her words, I want to set the context. I’m not quoting her word for word here, but […]

“I was in tears…” 

October 20, 2021 By Stephen Hedger

‘Initially I went to Stephen with a sole focus on saving my marriage as my husband wanted a divorce whilst I felt I could not let go of the 14 years’ relationship without giving it a second chance. My husband was determined to exit and refused to join the Marriage Breakthrough Programme with me, therefore […]

“Lawyer saves relationship alone”!

July 27, 2021 By Stephen Hedger

“I went to see Stephen when my relationship was at breaking point. The final trigger was my partner’s plan to sell his property and move in with me. We had until then a long-distance relationship and never spent more than about a month together (thanks to the COVID lockdown). I had finally moved to his […]

“It was like walking through a minefield blindfolded”

November 29, 2020 By Stephen Hedger

When relationships go wrong the pain can be unbelievable. Today’s post is about a couple whose relationship was quickly out of control and both people thought it was the end. When I first agreed to meet this couple she arrived first.  She was clearly very anxious, eyes darting, wringing hands, unsure if her husband would […]

One small shift changed her mind & saved her marriage – Part 2 of “Should divorce really be the next step?”

May 10, 2020 By Stephen Hedger

What sits at the core of the most successful marriages. What is it that makes the difference. What is it that helps couples stand the test of time? What is it that helps couples make it through all the ups and downs life has to throw at them? Is sex at the core for a […]

Do you want
To Save your Marriage?

Hi, I'm Stephen Hedger. I'm determined to help couples discover what their marriage is capable of with the right information. My only question is, will it be yours?

Learn more

 

“Free Marriage in Crisis 8 Page Guide”:

Stephen Hedger is a marriage in crisis specialist sought after by CEO’s Bankers, Judges, GP’s, Business Leaders, A List Celebrities and Entrepreneurs Globally


Stephen says when you are in marital crisis it's important to know what to do to make sure your next steps don't make the situation even worse. This short guide written by Stephen is designed to help you take a step back and consider next steps intelligently.

 

Click to Download FREE

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Head Office
10 Harley Street
London
W1G 9PF

Stephen Hedger offers married couples in crisis across the globe a comprehensive strategic roadmap to overcome their marriage problems. Today Stephen works with Celebrities, CEO’s, Lawyers, Bankers, Royalty, Judges, and business owners helping them transform their family and personal relationships with massive breakthroughs, seemingly against all odds.

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Recent Posts

  • “Needy and not needed!”
  • “Discover the No.1 Philosophy of Highly Effective Spouses: From Struggle to Success”
  • “Unveiling the Secrets: How I Mastered the Art of Resolving Relationship Issues”
  • 3 Foundations for a Healthy Marriage
  • Misdiagnosis – Divorce Prevention Part 3

*Disclaimer:
Any testimonials stated on this page or on any pages on the Stephen Hedger Marriage Coach website/s are proof of our success, naturally, results may vary from person to person.

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