The Hard Truth About Relationships
Most people come to me because their marriage is in so much trouble that without a powerful intervention, divorce would be the next stop. Today, I’m sharing something new about my approach to helping couples rebuild their relationships.
After years of disconnect…
They’re exhausted.
They’re frustrated.
They’ve tried everything—compromise, communication techniques, even many types of therapy.
And yet, nothing seems to work.
You might think these are all couples that hate each other, but many love/like each other but cannot find a way to connect, so the “in-love” part of the relationship isn’t alive, and that’s a big problem.
One thing many have in common is that they know what they feel isn’t the right feeling for an intimate relationship, which leads them into a sliding scale of distance as each person ends up meeting their needs outside of the marriage.
If any of that sounds familiar, I have something uncomfortable—but freeing—to tell you:
👉 The more you try to change your partner, the less change will happen.
That’s right. The very thing you’ve probably been working so hard to fix is probably making things worse.
But here’s the good news: once you stop forcing change and focus on what works, your relationship can shift faster than you ever imagined.
I have a very long list of people who were collapsing their marriage without knowing and were shown a powerful new approach.
Why Should You Listen to Me?
I don’t teach ‘relationship tips’ or gimmicks; I teach foundations that, if practised, last.
I help high-growth individuals worldwide learn to take control of their relationships with the same level of confidence they display in other areas of their lives.
One of the biggest frustrations for many of my clients is why I am successful everywhere in life except in my marriage.
Through The Breakthrough Frameworks, I’ve helped these individuals transform their marriages, even when they thought they were beyond saving. To be clear, some discovered through the framework why their relationship wasn’t working and would never work.
The process isn’t about glueing any two people together; it’s about discovering what’s actually possible for them.
One gentleman who came for help on his own asked me an interesting question. He asked what my mission was for him, and I said, “his happiness was the foundational mission!”
But here’s the first thing I need you to understand:
👉 It’s not about “fixing” your partner. It’s about mastering who YOU are in the relationship, as you are far more powerful than you think, and this is what so many miss.
The Common Mistakes That Are Keeping You Stuck
If you’ve been struggling in your relationship, chances are you’re making one (or all) of these mistakes:
🚫 Trying to change your partner – The more you push, the more they resist.
🚫 Blaming them for your unhappiness – Even if they are in the ‘wrong,’ this mindset is poison.
🚫 Focusing on ‘how-to’ techniques without real change – It’s not about quick-fix tactics.
These don’t work because they focus on blame, demand, control, judgment, and reaction instead of what actually creates lasting changes.
The Small Shift That Changes Everything
What if I told you that small shifts in how you think, feel, and show up make 80% of the difference in your relationship?
Imagine making a 5% change that aligns you with who you really are, and that creates an 80% difference in your effectiveness.
Think about the best version of yourself with the right knowledge—the one who just knows what to do.
- When you start leading with that version of yourself, your entire relationship has the potential to shift because you are now highly valuable to yourself and understand how to get the best from your partner.
- Your partner is now triggered to respond positively rather than the old way.
- Done correctly, this has the potential to reignite attraction because liking who they are when they are with you has the power to draw them to you.
- And suddenly, the same relationship that felt like a battle becomes a very different place to be.
The Breakthrough Framework: A New Way to Think About Love
What actually matters is a compound effect of understanding what adds significant value:
My Breakthrough Framework is built on Five Key Pillars:
1️⃣ Success Identity – Who do you need to become in your relationship? Most are unaware this is even a question, let alone how to do it.
2️⃣ Emotional Mastery – How do you control your emotional state, no matter what your partner does? Most people blame their partner for how they feel, so they never consider taking control in a way that adds value is important.
3️⃣ The Rules of Engagement – How do you create an environment where love, passion, and connection thrive? Most people are unaware that how they approach communication and connection matters.
4️⃣ Attraction Dynamics – Understanding the push-pull of masculine and feminine energy. Most are unaware that not understanding this means intimacy on all levels will be a struggle.
5️⃣ The Vision Alignment – What is the future you’re building together? Most either do this badly or don’t do it at all.
These principles transform relationships because they address the real issues at the root—not just the surface-level problems. Each Pillar is linked to the others, so together, they create an empowered way of being and showing up.
These Five Pillars are critical to any couple’s success, as they form the foundation of what the couple will experience. The foundation protects the marriage and keeps the relationship alive because both people understand how to remain invested because now they know what to do.
These foundations mean that problems are no longer problematic because deep foundations mean unbreakable trust.
People don’t trust a relationship where they lack confidence in themselves or in the relationship’s ability to produce predictable results.
“Yeah, But What If…”
At this point, you might be thinking:
Q: “But what if my partner isn’t willing to change?”
A: The beauty of this process is that you don’t need them to decide to change consciously. Right now, they’re reacting to you based on emotional patterns—most of which are automatic and unconscious.
When you change how you show up, their emotional response to you also shifts, whether they realise it or not. So, instead of triggering the same defensive reactions, your new approach creates a different emotional experience—one that feels safer, more positive, and easier to engage with.
Over time, they start associating a better feeling with you, naturally opening the door to a healthier connection.
Q: “What if I’ve already tried everything?”
You will have tried everything you know.
This program is to help you see what you would never have considered, no matter how hard you think or how intelligent you are.
Some of the brightest minds around the globe tell me they would never have created this new level of thinking—that’s the point is not about intelligence. It is about knowledge and wisdom and how to apply them.
Q: “What if it’s too late?”
A: I have seen couples sexually dead for 14 years reignite their intimacy.
I have seen people go through the whole divorce process only to rediscover each other love again.
I have seen a couple split up, buy separate homes, and bring them back together by only working on one person despite his wife saying there was absolutely no hope.
I have seen a divorced couple fall back in love and come to see me to ensure they could protect it as they were confused about what happened as they were so convinced the divorce was the right decision.
The real question is: Are you ready to try something new (to you) that’s clearly worked for those committed enough to give them the maximum chance of success?
What’s Next: Take the First Step
You now have a choice:
Do nothing and keep repeating the same patterns that got you here; you already know they don’t work…
Or take control and start leading your marriage in the right direction, together or alone.
If you’re serious about turning things around, your next step is simple:
🔹 Take the Masters Breakthrough Program For Individuals – Learn the exact framework that will empower you to lead your relationship and family to safety on your own.
>>> Click here to take that first step alone.
🔹 Join my Marriage Breakthrough Program For couples – Learn the exact framework that has transformed marriages for successful couples around the world.
>>> Click here to take the first step as a couple.
Final Thought: This Is Your Moment
Imagine what your life would be like if your marriage wasn’t a struggle because you know what to do no matter what happens.
If based on simple changes you can make imagine if you felt more support, more connection, and more understanding and appreciation from your partner.
Imagine if, based on these five simple shifts, your home life was now filled with many different levels of connection that now all make sense.
This isn’t a fantasy—it’s possible for those with the courage to step up – Cloe (my wife) and I are still practising this process everyday after nearly two decades together.
This doesn’t mean problems don’t arise; it means we deal with them very differently from most couples, and this keeps us connected no matter what is going on.
This is about learning a basic level of psychology strategically designed to help couples navigate the common pitfalls so many fall into.
This isn’t a quick change to fix a problem and then go back to your old ways; it’s a new, empowered way to live with someone who is designed to be different to you and experience the same world very differently from you.
And it starts right now. All you need to know is how.
Take action today. Your relationship deserves it.
1️⃣ Success Identity
2️⃣ Emotional Mastery
3️⃣ The Rules of Engagement
4️⃣ Attraction Dynamics
5️⃣ The Vision Alignment
Harley Street Expert | Founder & High Performance Coach
With two decades of experience helping couples out of crisis, Stephen the founder of The Marriage Breakthrough Program, uses his proven system for rescuing and rebuilding relationships on the edge of divorce. A trusted advisor to CEOs, entrepreneurs, and industry leaders globally, his work blends emotional intelligence with strategic clarity. Known for navigating highly complex relationship challenges, Stephen helps individuals and couples find clarity and direction when everything is at stake.
Find out more >>> The Marriage Breakthrough Program
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