If we want to be successful in our relationships, what goals do we need to focus on?
This answer is really very simple, your goal is to help your partner feel great about themselves in the context of you.
This is a very simple principal.
If your partner feels bad about themselves when they are around you, what happens is they attach those bad feeling to you and they then have to fight a need to get away from you.
If you help them to feel worse then they start to loose the will to fight and now they have a desire to run away from you.
Help your partner feel amazing, valued, loved, secure, significant by constantly giving them all then need and watch your relationship transform.
You did this when you were dating it worked then, so have a think, you stopped practicing this and now the relationships not as good as it was back then.
After all you say you love them so why not, put actions to your words and prove it’s true.