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Stephen Hedger

Stephen Hedger

Crisis Marriage Coach | Harley Street London

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“Crisis out of the blue”!

Some couples can find themselves in a confusing crisis because they have not experienced a specific problem.

This is because they have lived in a “perceptually happy” finely balanced emotional ecosystem for years.

They were totally unaware of what they are heading for because they felt happy.

Then a single change catastrophically upset that finely tuned balance and sends the couple into a confusing crisis.

So what if the ecosystem a couple creates at the start of their marriage is not sustainable for life and they are totally unaware of this fact?

I meet a lot of people in that very position who find themselves getting unhappier in their marriage, but don’t know why.

No big breaks of trust, no affairs, no abuse just something feels wrong.

Upon exploring the reason for the crisis we usually discover the marriage hasn’t changed other than ageing and time passing and the usual ups and downs everyone has.

What has actually changed is within the person who is now unhappy.

She rejected herself but she didn’t know

I see many cases of a person who didn’t know how to embrace themselves and their true needs at the start of their marriage.

Some of these people have rejected a big part of who they really are and now that rejected part wants to come out, be alive, and be seen.

One group of women who are feminine at their core have historically rejected that feminine energy within themselves and lived a masculine life within their marriage.

These women are doers who just get on with life, they get the job done without fuss. It’s a very useful energy for busy families.

Unfortunately, it’s only a matter of time before the hidden historically rejected energy needs to come out and this upsets the marital balance.

What she now needs has changed she doesn’t understand it and he is totally lost wishing they could go back to the old happiness they once enjoyed.

He liked her masculine energy, the new feminine energy makes no sense to him.

Of course, he wouldn’t call it feminine he has no name for it all he knows is her unhappiness towards him.

He thinks she has changed the reality is she is actually changing back.

Men can suffer with this too.

I see many men give up who they are to please their wives and then one very normal day without warning he announces he wants a divorce and he leaves her in a quest for freedom.

No warning!

Giving up who you really are to please a person or a marriage will always have consequences.

Men and women can hide their truth

Many people don’t share their true sexual needs through fear of not being loved and then we find out about their secret life and this brings immense stress to the relationship.

Some people who think they are happy but are really disconnected from what’s important to them will suffer.

I hear some people marry for security, dependability, and not love, they too end up suffering.

The younger them wanted what was safe until through maturity they no longer need that safety in the same way and now they want passion, excitement, and adventure instead.

Statistically, the younger the couple was when they married the higher risk of divorce.

BUT…

What if the change in a person was understood and the couple had the understanding and the tools to deal with this change?

If they did understand, many couples who are at the core right for each other wouldn’t need to go through the stress of a divorce.

The biggest fear for any couple is not understanding what is going on and what to do about it.

A crisis out of the blue is a huge worry for any couple, but the crisis doesn’t have to be the end.

For many, it’s the start of something new, a new freedom, and an exciting life adventure.

Category iconDestructive Patterns,  Marriage Coaching

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Recent Posts

  • “Should I Stay or Go?” Why You Shouldn’t Make Big Decisions While You’re Still Suffering
  • Stop & Never: The 30 Patterns That Quietly Destroy Relationships
  • “How to Fix Communication Issues in a Marriage”
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  • Impossible Marriage Problems?
  • “What if I’m not enough?”
  • “Another 5 Years Like This? No Way!”
  • In Crisis, their Minds Destroyed Their Lives
  • “Couples are failing at the basics…”
  • “You Might Be in the Wrong Relationship… But Not for the Reason You Think…”
  • Case Studies: “How Changing Your Perspective Can Fix Your Relationship—Here’s Proof”

Over 1300 Relationship Articles


Categories

  • A thought for Sunday (29)
  • Case Studies (2)
  • Communication (70)
  • Destructive Patterns (137)
  • Discussion (2)
  • Infidelity-Affairs (38)
  • Loss of Love (43)
  • Loss of passion (35)
  • Lost Attraction (22)
  • Marriage Coaching (423)
  • Marriage Mastery Assessment (1)
  • Masculine & Feminine (9)
  • Monday Breakthrough (2)
  • Personal Development (104)
  • Rebuilding trust (39)
  • Relationship Stories (24)
  • Retirement Crisis (6)
  • Save Marriage Alone (42)
  • Separation & Divorce (9)
  • Stop & Never – Mini Posts (54)
  • Stuck (9)
  • Testimonials (59)
  • Top 10 Popular Posts (12)
  • Uncategorized (761)

Primary Sidebar

I’m not going to ask you how you “feel", pay me to watch you argue, or try to find the person to blame.

I am looking to discover if the couple can become a team, overcome their problems together and create a dynamic that will create a loving and passionate life together.

My approach is to take you from where you are, to where you want to be… fast!

I can not recommend Stephen highly enough – he not only saved our marriage, but has improved my marriage and myself as a person.

Banker - London

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Do You Want
To Save Your Marriage?

Hi, I'm Stephen Hedger. I'm determined to help couples discover what their marriage is capable of with the right information. My only question is, will it be yours?

Learn more

A 30 minute call with Stephen

In a short phone conversation, Stephen was able to quickly get to the heart of what the real issue was in our marriage – and why in almost a year of working on our marriage including 10 weeks of marriage counselling through a relationship therapy organisation, we weren’t really making any progress. I found Stephen to be extremely perceptive, as well as empathetic to our situation, while being able to quickly pinpoint the real sticking point in our marriage.
Many thanks
Olivia

Dear Stephen
Thank you for your time to listen to my experience in my marriage. You gave me encouragement to speak out to my partner in confidence. You made me realise that sometimes the way we make comments on each other can aggravate the situation and make it worse. Your advice made me feel revived.

Kind regards

Chipo

Success Stories

From Battlefield to Breakthrough: How to Save Your Marriage Without a Toxic Fight.

January 31, 2025 By Stephen Hedger

Most people who come to me for help believe their marriage is broken, so their level of hope is not high. Many will have tried to fix the problems without success. These people are unaware that there is a critical mindset shift: if you don’t make it, your chances of success dramatically drop. As you […]

“By changing yourself, you can change a relationship… because I did!”

September 16, 2024 By Stephen Hedger

We were in the process of physical separation, with my husband arranging to move out at the end of the month, and I was getting legal advice on proceeding with the divorce.  On one of those distressed and sleepless nights, I came across Stephen’s website and his blog. I was fascinated. What Stephen has written […]

“There’s no hope in hell – I want a divorce!”

April 22, 2024 By Stephen Hedger

So what do you do when the trust is broken so badly that their relationship ends with them selling their family home and moving into separate homes? Most people would consider this the end, but this gentleman decided something different. He wrote to me to see if I could help. I wanted to encourage his […]

Marriage Crisis from Infidelity & Communication Breakdown

August 21, 2023 By Stephen Hedger

Today’s post is about a professional couple in the UK who decided they wanted to share their experience of their tailormade program that was designed to help them out of their marital challenges. They were in crisis due to communication breakdown and infidelity. They had 12 meetings over five months to learn how to reconnect […]

His Marriage was Over!

June 5, 2023 By Stephen Hedger

This man was in the depths of sadness; his marriage was over, but he didn’t want it to be. They had seen numerous counsellors who had all concluded the marriage was indeed over. He had lost all feelings for his wife. Due to being so stuck for so long, he had started an affair. But […]

“Free Marriage in Crisis 8 Page Guide”:

Stephen Hedger is a marriage in crisis specialist sought after by CEO’s Bankers, Judges, GP’s, Business Leaders, A List Celebrities and Entrepreneurs Globally.


Stephen says when you are in marital crisis it's important to know what to do to make sure your next steps don't make the situation even worse. This short guide written by Stephen is designed to help you take a step back and consider next steps intelligently.


Click to Download FREE

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Recent Clients: New York, Dubai, Los Angeles, Austrailia, Japan, Germany, France, Ireland, UK, Monaco to name a few.

Stephen Hedger offers married couples in crisis across the globe a comprehensive strategic roadmap to overcome their marriage problems.

Today Stephen works with Celebrities, CEO’s, Lawyers, Bankers, Royalty, Judges, and business owners helping them transform their family and personal relationships with massive breakthroughs, seemingly against all odds.

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Recent Posts

  • “Should I Stay or Go?” Why You Shouldn’t Make Big Decisions While You’re Still Suffering
  • Stop & Never: The 30 Patterns That Quietly Destroy Relationships
  • “How to Fix Communication Issues in a Marriage”
  • “First Step to Fixing Any Marriage Problem”
  • Impossible Marriage Problems?
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*Disclaimer:
Any testimonials stated on this page or on any pages on the Stephen Hedger Marriage Coach website/s are proof of our success, naturally, results may vary from person to person.

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