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Stephen Hedger

Stephen Hedger

Crisis Marriage Coach | Harley Street London

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He said She said…

Many couples arrive at my sessions very keen to share the story of their pain and suffering.

They want me to know what their partner did wrong.

They want me to see their version of events so I can back them up.

People that come to me with these stories are so wrapped up with what happened that they are missing the very thing that will help them gain a truth, a truth that will affect the rest of their lives.

So when a wife tells me of his affair if I’m to help them I will not sit in judgement of either person and take sides.

Friends may take sides, but as someone who wants to give the truth of their situation a chance, taking sides is not a productive action.

When a husband tells me his wife is constantly aggressive and negative I don’t take his side because happily connected wives don’t respond this way.

You see the missing element to everyone’s story is the answer to the question “why?”.

Why do people act in these ways?

Until that question is uncovered even if the couple does patch things up that reconnection is at risk of being temporary.

The why question leads us to the core reason behind a person’s actions.

This is where the problem starts.

Either people are not asking the “why” question or they don’t know how to translate what’s going on so they never get to the why.

I see so many people end up making the wrong conclusions within their own minds, and this leads them to not liking their interpretation.

This type of thinking initially causes themselves pain and unless the person is helped out of their destructive thinking they will suffer so much they will either stop taking part or have to leave their marriage.

So people are literally thinking themselves out of marriages that could have worked if they only started to ask the right questions.

So both people can live and stay married to their individual stories (their perceptions) or they can search for the truth.

You see growing up we are not taught that just because we have a thought or a belief it doesn’t make it a fact.

Beliefs are simply a perspective.

The problem with beliefs is they bring judgements.

My clients are encouraged to drop their judgments and replace them with curiosity.

It’s far safer to assume you don’t know than to convince yourself what you do know is a fact.

People who are always right have nothing to learn so with this dead-end thinking, they can’t evolve or grow.

The smart people know with relationship problems the only people who’ll come out well are the ones that are open to learning.

I see significant numbers of CEOs and their partners, these are very smart people.

These people are open to learning, they know that learning is how growth happens.

You see rebuilding relationships is as much about personal development and personal empowerment as it is about reconnection.

So the answer to your relationship problems sits in the question, why?

Why is my husband or wife behaving this way?

The next observation is you must look at that question through their eyes not your own because looking through your own will only bring the wrong or distorted answers.

This is why people suffer and get it wrong and keep getting it wrong until one day when they wake up to what they don’t know.

Wisdom teaches us how much we don’t know so we become curious enough to evolve.

So let’s start here.

No matter how smart or how intuitive a person is they will never naturally understand their partner.

Learning your partner is like learning a new language.

You already know no matter how hard you think you’ll never speak a new language without education.

So the moment a person understands this is their first step to a new world, your partner’s world the one that is very different to yours, but normal to them.

This is the start of your path to success.

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Recent Posts

  • “Should I Stay or Go?” Why You Shouldn’t Make Big Decisions While You’re Still Suffering
  • Stop & Never: The 30 Patterns That Quietly Destroy Relationships
  • “How to Fix Communication Issues in a Marriage”
  • “First Step to Fixing Any Marriage Problem”
  • Impossible Marriage Problems?
  • “What if I’m not enough?”
  • “Another 5 Years Like This? No Way!”
  • In Crisis, their Minds Destroyed Their Lives
  • “Couples are failing at the basics…”
  • “You Might Be in the Wrong Relationship… But Not for the Reason You Think…”
  • Case Studies: “How Changing Your Perspective Can Fix Your Relationship—Here’s Proof”

Over 1300 Relationship Articles


Categories

  • A thought for Sunday (29)
  • Case Studies (2)
  • Communication (70)
  • Destructive Patterns (137)
  • Discussion (2)
  • Infidelity-Affairs (38)
  • Loss of Love (43)
  • Loss of passion (35)
  • Lost Attraction (22)
  • Marriage Coaching (423)
  • Marriage Mastery Assessment (1)
  • Masculine & Feminine (9)
  • Monday Breakthrough (2)
  • Personal Development (104)
  • Rebuilding trust (39)
  • Relationship Stories (24)
  • Retirement Crisis (6)
  • Save Marriage Alone (42)
  • Separation & Divorce (9)
  • Stop & Never – Mini Posts (54)
  • Stuck (9)
  • Testimonials (59)
  • Top 10 Popular Posts (12)
  • Uncategorized (761)

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I’m not going to ask you how you “feel", pay me to watch you argue, or try to find the person to blame.

I am looking to discover if the couple can become a team, overcome their problems together and create a dynamic that will create a loving and passionate life together.

My approach is to take you from where you are, to where you want to be… fast!

I can not recommend Stephen highly enough – he not only saved our marriage, but has improved my marriage and myself as a person.

Banker - London

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Do You Want
To Save Your Marriage?

Hi, I'm Stephen Hedger. I'm determined to help couples discover what their marriage is capable of with the right information. My only question is, will it be yours?

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A 30 minute call with Stephen

In a short phone conversation, Stephen was able to quickly get to the heart of what the real issue was in our marriage – and why in almost a year of working on our marriage including 10 weeks of marriage counselling through a relationship therapy organisation, we weren’t really making any progress. I found Stephen to be extremely perceptive, as well as empathetic to our situation, while being able to quickly pinpoint the real sticking point in our marriage.
Many thanks
Olivia

Dear Stephen
Thank you for your time to listen to my experience in my marriage. You gave me encouragement to speak out to my partner in confidence. You made me realise that sometimes the way we make comments on each other can aggravate the situation and make it worse. Your advice made me feel revived.

Kind regards

Chipo

Success Stories

From Battlefield to Breakthrough: How to Save Your Marriage Without a Toxic Fight.

January 31, 2025 By Stephen Hedger

Most people who come to me for help believe their marriage is broken, so their level of hope is not high. Many will have tried to fix the problems without success. These people are unaware that there is a critical mindset shift: if you don’t make it, your chances of success dramatically drop. As you […]

“By changing yourself, you can change a relationship… because I did!”

September 16, 2024 By Stephen Hedger

We were in the process of physical separation, with my husband arranging to move out at the end of the month, and I was getting legal advice on proceeding with the divorce.  On one of those distressed and sleepless nights, I came across Stephen’s website and his blog. I was fascinated. What Stephen has written […]

“There’s no hope in hell – I want a divorce!”

April 22, 2024 By Stephen Hedger

So what do you do when the trust is broken so badly that their relationship ends with them selling their family home and moving into separate homes? Most people would consider this the end, but this gentleman decided something different. He wrote to me to see if I could help. I wanted to encourage his […]

Marriage Crisis from Infidelity & Communication Breakdown

August 21, 2023 By Stephen Hedger

Today’s post is about a professional couple in the UK who decided they wanted to share their experience of their tailormade program that was designed to help them out of their marital challenges. They were in crisis due to communication breakdown and infidelity. They had 12 meetings over five months to learn how to reconnect […]

His Marriage was Over!

June 5, 2023 By Stephen Hedger

This man was in the depths of sadness; his marriage was over, but he didn’t want it to be. They had seen numerous counsellors who had all concluded the marriage was indeed over. He had lost all feelings for his wife. Due to being so stuck for so long, he had started an affair. But […]

“Free Marriage in Crisis 8 Page Guide”:

Stephen Hedger is a marriage in crisis specialist sought after by CEO’s Bankers, Judges, GP’s, Business Leaders, A List Celebrities and Entrepreneurs Globally.


Stephen says when you are in marital crisis it's important to know what to do to make sure your next steps don't make the situation even worse. This short guide written by Stephen is designed to help you take a step back and consider next steps intelligently.


Click to Download FREE

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Recent Clients: New York, Dubai, Los Angeles, Austrailia, Japan, Germany, France, Ireland, UK, Monaco to name a few.

Stephen Hedger offers married couples in crisis across the globe a comprehensive strategic roadmap to overcome their marriage problems.

Today Stephen works with Celebrities, CEO’s, Lawyers, Bankers, Royalty, Judges, and business owners helping them transform their family and personal relationships with massive breakthroughs, seemingly against all odds.

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Recent Posts

  • “Should I Stay or Go?” Why You Shouldn’t Make Big Decisions While You’re Still Suffering
  • Stop & Never: The 30 Patterns That Quietly Destroy Relationships
  • “How to Fix Communication Issues in a Marriage”
  • “First Step to Fixing Any Marriage Problem”
  • Impossible Marriage Problems?
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*Disclaimer:
Any testimonials stated on this page or on any pages on the Stephen Hedger Marriage Coach website/s are proof of our success, naturally, results may vary from person to person.

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