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Stephen Hedger

Stephen Hedger

Crisis Marriage Coach | Harley Street London

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He was visibly shocked: Transformation out of depression and anxiety

What do you do when you can feel your life is falling apart and you don’t know why or how to stop it?

Earlier this year a gentleman attended a meeting with me. He told me two years ago a couple who were his friends had come to see me and because they were delighted with their transformation they both said he must come and get my help as his marriage was suffering.

He said he didn’t know why it had taken so long to book in but he said he was now in so much pain and suffering he couldn’t see a way out and didn’t think anyone could help.

As he shared his story I could hear he was very stuck.

He was CEO of a tech company BUT he rarely went to work because he lived with terrible anxiety and depressive moods.

His business was suffering massively as a result.

He had also moved out of his family home as the marriage became impossible for them both.

He suffered from such bad reactions to his family even his children struggled with him and he was losing a relationship with them all.

As I listened to his heart-wrenching story I could see he had become a victim of a very troubled childhood and he was stuck in the wrong identity based on a decision he made to cope with his old life.

He was essentially living the life patterns he had created as a child to protect himself and these old patterns were now out of date and not working.

He was not aware.

Essentially he carried his terrible past with him everywhere and was beaten down daily by his depression and this created no way to achieve the life he really wanted so he had lost confidence and trust in himself.

He was in a vicious cycle with no way out.

Even though I could see his childhood was his problem I’m really not a fan of taking him back to relive such a traumatic time. I wanted to create a transformation that freed him by moving him forward in a way that cut ties with that past so he was genuinely free.

I could see he learnt well through understanding visual models of what had happened to him so I started his transformation in the sessions by giving him the knowledge through visual models so he understood what was happening to him and why.

I then created powerful processes to help him break the destructive patterns and provided him with the tools he could use at home to make sure he stayed on track.

I got to work quickly firstly helping him see how his depression was formed so he could learn how to break this destructive pattern.

I then helped him to learn about his relationship with his own past and how and why his mind had held onto it, this knowledge helped him disconnect from what wasn’t useful and keep what he needed.

I then helped him understand how he was living in an outdated identity and that fear was running his life and this was stopping him connecting to himself. I told him that living this way would make him very tired and everything would feel a real effort.

Understanding this enabled him to consciously create a new decision to live connected to his true identity this meant a far better energy.

Each time he attended a session he was visibly shocked at what was happening to him.

He came into the last meeting with a new message for me.

He said his anxiety was gone.

He said he was no longer depressed.

He said he is now going to work every day.

He also said his wife was so impressed with his change they went away for a short break and they now want to work on their marriage with me.

In the last session, we created a plan to help him know where to put his energy into the business.

We created a plan to integrate his wife into our meetings.

and

We created a plan to help him rebuild a relationship with his children.

I asked him what he was now experiencing.

He said so much has changed and he was in such a dark place for so long and there didn’t seem to be an answer.

He said, “I’m now really excited about the future”.

He said, “This process has been so powerful for me to reconnect with myself so I can take control of my life”.

Shaking his head he said, “I know we have more meetings and I’m looking forward to working with my wife on our marriage but I’m so shocked at how much we have achieved in just 3 sessions”.

I did share with him at the start of his process that most people will tell you that change takes a long time.

I told him that changes can actually happen instantly it’s the needing to feel safe to change that’s what really takes the time.

Naturally, he didn’t believe me until he actually experienced it for himself.

Anyone who is suffering from their own emotional problems will naturally have problems in their marriage.

This is why for some couples the work starts with the individuals first so I can help them become valuable to the marriage before we start couples work.

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"Marriage in Crisis? Application to work with Stephen Hedger"

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Recent Posts

  • What’s the root cause of our problems?
  • Does their pain matter?
  • “FREEDOM”
  • A thought for Sunday
  • Affairs!

Over 850 Relationship Articles

 

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Do You Want
To Save Your Marriage?

Hi, I'm Stephen Hedger. I'm determined to help couples discover what their marriage is capable of with the right information. My only question is, will it be yours?

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About Stephen Hedger

Stephen Hedger is known as the most sought after marriage in crisis specialist in the UK. He is famous for consistently and naturally saving many marriages from divorce. He is a favourite of business leaders, business owners, Judges and celebrities.

Stephen runs his meetings from his office in Harley Street London and supports his global clients over Zoom.

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A 30 minute call with Stephen

In a short phone conversation, Stephen was able to quickly get to the heart of what the real issue was in our marriage – and why in almost a year of working on our marriage including 10 weeks of marriage counselling through a relationship therapy organisation, we weren’t really making any progress. I found Stephen to be extremely perceptive, as well as empathetic to our situation, while being able to quickly pinpoint the real sticking point in our marriage.
Many thanks
Olivia

Dear Stephen
Thank you for your time to listen to my experience in my marriage. You gave me encouragement to speak out to my partner in confidence. You made me realise that sometimes the way we make comments on each other can aggravate the situation and make it worse. Your advice made me feel revived.

Kind regards

Chipo

Success Stories

“It was like walking through a minefield blindfolded”

November 29, 2020 By Stephen Hedger

When relationships go wrong the pain can be unbelievable. Today’s post is about a couple whose relationship was quickly out of control and both people thought it was the end. When I first agreed to meet this couple she arrived first.  She was clearly very anxious, eyes darting, wringing hands, unsure if her husband would […]

One small shift changed her mind & saved her marriage – Part 2 of “Should divorce really be the next step?”

May 10, 2020 By Stephen Hedger

What sits at the core of the most successful marriages. What is it that makes the difference. What is it that helps couples stand the test of time? What is it that helps couples make it through all the ups and downs life has to throw at them? Is sex at the core for a […]

Please Save Our Marriage! – Testimonial

March 1, 2020 By Stephen Hedger

Please Save Our Marriage! This was the first email I recieved from Darren and Sue, they were at breaking point. When they first entered my clinic you could cut the atmosphere with a knife. This was a couple with young children on the edge, breaking up seemed like the only option open to them… Sue […]

“He thought his life was over..!”

March 1, 2020 By Stephen Hedger

Today’s post is a little different. I wanted to share with you a clients words about his experience of the pain of his divorce and the process of rebuilding him and his future. Over to him… The words hit me like a hammer ~ “There’s nothing wrong with you. You’re not broken, you never were. […]

“His emotions were sabotaging what he really wanted…”

November 3, 2019 By Stephen Hedger

What you are about to read is about is a gentleman in turmoil. He thought he had lost the girl he loved and his one-year-old son. She had left him and this connected him to his core fears, emotions that were powerful enough to sabotage him from getting the very thing he wanted. As his […]

Do you want
To Save your Marriage?

Hi, I'm Stephen Hedger. I'm determined to help couples discover what their marriage is capable of with the right information. My only question is, will it be yours?

Learn more

 

“Free Marriage in Crisis 8 Page Guide”:

Stephen Hedger is known as the most sought after marriage in crisis specialist in the UK. He is famous for saving marriages from divorce through his tailored Marriage Breakthrough Program.


Stephen says when you are in marital crisis it's important to know what to do to make sure your next steps don't make the situation even worse. This short guide written by Stephen is designed to help you take a step back and consider next steps intelligently.

 

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Stephen Hedger offers married couples in crisis across the globe a comprehensive strategic roadmap to overcome their marriage problems. Today Stephen works with Celebrities, CEO’s, Lawyers, Bankers, Royalty, Judges, and business owners helping them transform their family and personal relationships with massive breakthroughs, seemingly against all odds.

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Recent Posts

  • What’s the root cause of our problems?
  • Does their pain matter?
  • “FREEDOM”
  • A thought for Sunday
  • Affairs!

*Disclaimer:
Any testimonials stated on this page or on any pages on the Stephen Hedger Marriage Coach website/s are proof of our success, naturally, results may vary from person to person.

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