As a coach I am interested in all areas of improvement from heath to wealth. What I find is how the methods used to help people become financially free and healthier are the same foundational principles that I use to help people create better relationships.
So in principal if you understand one then the foundations are in place to understand them all.
What are the barriers to success
So what are the key areas that will block people from creating wealth and fitness that are totally in line with why couples are blocked from creating successful relationships.
1. Fear
2. Cynicism
3. Laziness
4. Bad Habits
5. Arrogance
1. Fear
Anyone that is experiencing relationship problems is going to be in fear that the future will not be the way they want it to be. This fear creates poor states that disable the person from acting in a way that creates growth for themselves and the relationship. In this place the person can feel disconnected and dislike who they are becoming.
2. Cynicism
Couples can become cynical about their relationship because they feel that over the years they have collected enough proof the relationship is wrong. Of course with two people in fear, feeling disconnected with who they really are, the couple start to feel the relationship has changed from when they first met and they are no longer compatible.
3. Laziness
People become lazy because they can’t see a way forward. They lose motivation when they don’t get the results they want fast. Instead of looking for new answers they keep repeating the old ones, hoping that a new change in their partner will happen. This never works so they stop putting effort in and they become lazy.
4. Bad Habits
Habits get learnt through a persons life and if they are taught how to create relationship by those that are equally lost (their parents), then the foundations are too weak to hold a relationship together. They become their bad habits without knowing and bit by bit they destroy the relationship in their quest to save it.
5. Arrogance
What then happens is the person with years of distorted perceptions of themselves and their relationship think they understand their problems. In reality they are a million miles away from their truth. So they blame everyone else for their problems and think they know best. Most won’t seek help and even if they do they are just going through the motions. What they usually want is for me to change their partner because it’s their fault.
So if you want to be rich in all that life has to offer then overcoming all the above has to be the focus. You see it is easy to find everything that wrong in a relationship and end it anyone can do that, it’s not until a person has had many failed relationships that they start to ask themselves where does the real problem sit.
Many of course chose through fear to not ask this question decide to forget relationships altogether and live life alone. For them it is better to be alone and right, at least that way they are safe.
Of course they are not safe because inside them sits the proof that really they were never enough and they are not loved.
So what is the truth for you? Is now the time to understand and set yourself free?