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Stephen Hedger

Stephen Hedger

Crisis Marriage Coach | Harley Street London

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Retirement triggers marital crisis

He was a powerful figure in a very successful career. She was a supportive wife and loving mother. All set for retirement they were both shocked at the desperately negative place they found themselves in.

This gentlemen has kindly shared his story with you. He really couldn’t find or see a way forward and had concluded that leaving the relationship was probably their only option.

Many couples suffer with this kind of problem because they are unable to understand how to solve it.

These are his words.

Ours is a unique story – or so we thought until we met with Stephen. 

Having been married for over 38 years, we were a role-model couple and an envy of many divorced around us amongst our friends and family.

Yet, after I took retirement from over 30 years of career that involved extensive global travel, I found our life at home far from being blissful. Suddenly, we were spending a lot of time together but this was not making me or my wife happier as we had expected it would.

What seemed like odd bits of complaining, that I had previously (ignored as noise) with the alleged need to focus on the higher calling from demands of work, got amplified into a 24/7 situation. We both responded by digging up all the past grievances and dug ourselves into a constant state of bickering and arguing – mostly about historical events that neither of us could undo. Each of us felt under appreciated for the sacrifices made and we were feeling short changed of the happiness that we had strived for all our lives.

After my retirement, I felt free for the first time to do what I always wanted to do but could not when working – we had the means and time – why should we not both have fun. After all, we had both made significant sacrifices and deserved to now live together in the peace and harmony.

I could not find this positive energy at home – it was because of all the wrong that I was perceived to have done in my past but could no longer undo. The option of running away and restarting with a clean slate looked like the only way to avoid what seemed like a marriage destined to be full of negativism.

We both loved each other and each had a lot to lose by breaking up at this late stage in our lives. So we decided to find and go for the best marriage counsellor we could find.

About that time, I read an email sent by Stephen with one of his offers of a free session. I read his blogs and these echoed well with me. It was easy to convince my wife to try out a session with Stephen to figure out if we had a chance to save our marriage.

For me it was a last port of call before I walked away from being constantly reminded of how many mistakes I had made in the 38 years of marriage. For my wife, it was an opportunity to figure out how to set our marriage on a better path.

At our first session with Stephen, we were shocked by how quickly he understood us and our issues. He was also able to show us a very credible path to figure out for ourselves the truth from the noise in our domestic discussions. He was clear from the outset. He was not there to fix our marriage. He was going to show us what we were doing wrong and help us figure out what each of us wanted from the marriage. It was for us to then decide for ourselves if we were willing to make the changes needed to bridge the gaps going forward.

Stephen is a highly skilled and an experienced marriage counsellor. There are not many situations he has not come across in the past. He also cleverly compliments his experiential knowledge with structured relationship frameworks that enable self-discovery and provide foundation to the advice he gives.

Initially, I wanted to rush to a conclusion but soon realised the value of a longer timeframe for our engagement with him. Some sessions were for us as a couple while others were as individuals. Each session left us with a “wow” – if only we had known that going into the marriage or “ah hah” – so that is what is causing all the arguments between us. We had time between the sessions to experiment between us and to provide Stephen with feedback.

He taught us to understand how different we were in our needs and how recalling historical incidents to fuel an argument (whilst tempting and natural) was futile. We also learnt that passion happens from having shared vision of the future and from doing the right things together where there is alignment. More than anything else, we have stopped clouding our relationship with issues from the past and are able to have conversations about situations objectively. We still have differences but at least we are able to deal with these in a more rational and a mature way.

We owe Stephen a big thank you for putting our lives together on a positive track and giving our marriage a decent chance of a success. He is empathetic, understanding and assertive on several aspects. He gave us very wise counsel. It is now up to us to embed what we learnt into our daily lives. In the end, whatever we decide will be more rational rather than being based on an emotionally confused state.

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Stephen Hedger
Stephen Hedger
About the author:

Harley Street Expert | Founder & High Performance Coach

With two decades of experience helping couples out of crisis, Stephen the founder of The Marriage Breakthrough Program, uses his proven system for rescuing and rebuilding relationships on the edge of divorce. A trusted advisor to CEOs, entrepreneurs, and industry leaders globally, his work blends emotional intelligence with strategic clarity. Known for navigating highly complex relationship challenges, Stephen helps individuals and couples find clarity and direction when everything is at stake.

Click to find out more >>> The Marriage Breakthrough Program
Stephen Hedger
Latest posts by Stephen Hedger (see all)
  • All successful people have done this to save their marriage and avoid an almost certain divorce! - May 30, 2020
  • 10 Steps for Divorce Prevention - May 25, 2020
  • Marriage Breakthrough – “Why did they change their minds?” - May 23, 2020

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"Working with Stephen was the most valuable 12 hours of my life. He gave me the tools to build a deeply loving, passionate relationship. His compassion, humour, and insight truly transformed me as a man."

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I’m not going to ask you how you “feel", pay me to watch you argue, or try to find the person to blame.

I am looking to discover if the couple can become a team, overcome their problems together and create a dynamic that will create a loving and passionate life together.

My approach is to take you from where you are, to where you want to be… fast!

I can not recommend Stephen highly enough – he not only saved our marriage, but has improved my marriage and myself as a person.

Banker - London

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Hi, I'm Stephen Hedger. I'm determined to help couples discover what their marriage is capable of with the right information. My only question is, will it be yours?

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A 30 minute call with Stephen

In a short phone conversation, Stephen was able to quickly get to the heart of what the real issue was in our marriage – and why in almost a year of working on our marriage including 10 weeks of marriage counselling through a relationship therapy organisation, we weren’t really making any progress. I found Stephen to be extremely perceptive, as well as empathetic to our situation, while being able to quickly pinpoint the real sticking point in our marriage.
Many thanks
Olivia

Dear Stephen
Thank you for your time to listen to my experience in my marriage. You gave me encouragement to speak out to my partner in confidence. You made me realise that sometimes the way we make comments on each other can aggravate the situation and make it worse. Your advice made me feel revived.

Kind regards

Chipo

Success Stories

From Battlefield to Breakthrough: How to Save Your Marriage Without a Toxic Fight.

January 31, 2025 By Stephen Hedger

Most people who come to me for help believe their marriage is broken, so their level of hope is not high. Many will have tried to fix the problems without success. These people are unaware that there is a critical mindset shift: if you don’t make it, your chances of success dramatically drop. As you […]

“By changing yourself, you can change a relationship… because I did!”

September 16, 2024 By Stephen Hedger

We were in the process of physical separation, with my husband arranging to move out at the end of the month, and I was getting legal advice on proceeding with the divorce.  On one of those distressed and sleepless nights, I came across Stephen’s website and his blog. I was fascinated. What Stephen has written […]

“There’s no hope in hell – I want a divorce!”

April 22, 2024 By Stephen Hedger

So what do you do when the trust is broken so badly that their relationship ends with them selling their family home and moving into separate homes? Most people would consider this the end, but this gentleman decided something different. He wrote to me to see if I could help. I wanted to encourage his […]

Marriage Crisis from Infidelity & Communication Breakdown

August 21, 2023 By Stephen Hedger

Today’s post is about a professional couple in the UK who decided they wanted to share their experience of their tailormade program that was designed to help them out of their marital challenges. They were in crisis due to communication breakdown and infidelity. They had 12 meetings over five months to learn how to reconnect […]

His Marriage was Over!

June 5, 2023 By Stephen Hedger

This man was in the depths of sadness; his marriage was over, but he didn’t want it to be. They had seen numerous counsellors who had all concluded the marriage was indeed over. He had lost all feelings for his wife. Due to being so stuck for so long, he had started an affair. But […]

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Recent Clients: Scotland, Ireland, Texas, New York, Dubai, Los Angeles, Austrailia, Japan, Germany, France, Ireland, UK, Monaco to name a few.

Stephen Hedger offers married couples in crisis across the globe a comprehensive strategic roadmap to overcome their marriage problems.

Today Stephen works with Celebrities, CEO’s, Lawyers, Bankers, Royalty, Judges, and business owners helping them transform their family and personal relationships with massive breakthroughs, seemingly against all odds.

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Recent Posts

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  • “Your Marriage is On FIRE”
  • What If Everything You’re Trying to Fix… Isn’t the Problem?
  • FREE Coaching: 5 Days to Clarity in Your Marriage
  • Helping Women Understand Their Husbands

*Disclaimer:
Any testimonials stated on this page or on any pages on the Stephen Hedger Marriage Coach website/s are proof of our success, naturally, results may vary from person to person.

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