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Stephen Hedger

Stephen Hedger

Crisis Marriage Coach | Harley Street London

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What really causes marriages to fail?

I have never shared this before, this information I’m about to share is normally reserved for my “Marriage Breakthrough Program” clients.

 So please take your time and follow this carefully.

Most people think that what causes marriages to fail is affairs, arguments, inability to communicate, stress, negativity, loss of sexual connection, money problems, boredom etc.

What if you knew that this wasn’t true, what if all the problems couples face is not their real problem. Would that now make sense to why so many couples go round and round in circles frustrated at each other.

In todays post I am going to share the real influencer behind couples problems and how with the right help many problems couples face are quickly solvable.

So what is it that really causes our relationships to die, what causes divorce and what causes families to be needlessly ripped apart.

These influencers are powerful and will shut down a couples ability to grow their relationship. If your relationship doesn’t grow it dies and this wakes up our fears.

First influencer is the programming we received from the ages of pre-birth to seven. During this time our minds were absorbing all the messages our surroundings are giving us.

This programming is very powerful as it forms the foundation of our automatic reactions through into adult life. For example if a child feels they are always wrong, they will grow up feeling they are unlovable which will be a significant challenge for that person especially in adult relationships.

The subconscious mind is powerful and will create automatic feelings, but it also has limitations. For example: it has no concept of time it will just react if triggered. So an emotionally charged event historically will still have the subconscious on red alert 30 years later for some similar event.

With so many programs automatically in place to keep us safe our automatic reactions to our relationships can shift us into fearful states without us knowing. Plus understanding that most humans live most of their lives automatically it’s not difficult to see why these outdated programs can cause so many problems.

This creates conscious fear and shuts down our ability/desire to give the relationship what it needs to survive and the result is the person is focus on protecting themselves from their partner actions or reactions.

So now you know most of us are living on automatic pilot in reaction to the world we live in, now imagine two people on automatic pilot with their fears all waiting to be triggers without the couple knowing, what is going to happen?

Of course disaster, and over time the result is affairs, arguments, inability to communicate, stress, negativity, loss of sexual connection, money problems, boredom etc.

The way to overcome and prevent marital disaster is to learn what the subconscious is really trying to achieve and guide it consciously to a safer place.

Simply speaking help the couple to learn new behaviours in their marriage that are designed to keep them secure and fulfil each others core needs.

The reason couples find success with me is they learn what their minds are trying to achieve automatically and with the skills they learn they discover how to fulfil not just their own needs, but their partners too, thus aiding long-term pleasurable connection.

In fact many couples decided to continue working with me individually using life coaching as a means to use their new understanding to fulfil other key areas of their lives such as career, wealth, weight, goals.

Don’t suffer anymore, stop going round in circles, call Cloe today and now book your first step toward your goals.

 

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Recent Posts

  • Do You Know Your Values & Why They Are So Important?
  • “Should I Stay or Go?” Why You Shouldn’t Make Big Decisions While You’re Still Suffering
  • Stop & Never: The 30 Patterns That Quietly Destroy Relationships
  • “How to Fix Communication Issues in a Marriage”
  • “First Step to Fixing Any Marriage Problem”
  • Impossible Marriage Problems?
  • “What if I’m not enough?”
  • “Another 5 Years Like This? No Way!”
  • In Crisis, their Minds Destroyed Their Lives
  • “Couples are failing at the basics…”
  • “You Might Be in the Wrong Relationship… But Not for the Reason You Think…”

Over 1300 Relationship Articles


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I’m not going to ask you how you “feel", pay me to watch you argue, or try to find the person to blame.

I am looking to discover if the couple can become a team, overcome their problems together and create a dynamic that will create a loving and passionate life together.

My approach is to take you from where you are, to where you want to be… fast!

I can not recommend Stephen highly enough – he not only saved our marriage, but has improved my marriage and myself as a person.

Banker - London

Popular Posts

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Do You Want
To Save Your Marriage?

Hi, I'm Stephen Hedger. I'm determined to help couples discover what their marriage is capable of with the right information. My only question is, will it be yours?

Learn more

A 30 minute call with Stephen

In a short phone conversation, Stephen was able to quickly get to the heart of what the real issue was in our marriage – and why in almost a year of working on our marriage including 10 weeks of marriage counselling through a relationship therapy organisation, we weren’t really making any progress. I found Stephen to be extremely perceptive, as well as empathetic to our situation, while being able to quickly pinpoint the real sticking point in our marriage.
Many thanks
Olivia

Dear Stephen
Thank you for your time to listen to my experience in my marriage. You gave me encouragement to speak out to my partner in confidence. You made me realise that sometimes the way we make comments on each other can aggravate the situation and make it worse. Your advice made me feel revived.

Kind regards

Chipo

Success Stories

From Battlefield to Breakthrough: How to Save Your Marriage Without a Toxic Fight.

January 31, 2025 By Stephen Hedger

Most people who come to me for help believe their marriage is broken, so their level of hope is not high. Many will have tried to fix the problems without success. These people are unaware that there is a critical mindset shift: if you don’t make it, your chances of success dramatically drop. As you […]

“By changing yourself, you can change a relationship… because I did!”

September 16, 2024 By Stephen Hedger

We were in the process of physical separation, with my husband arranging to move out at the end of the month, and I was getting legal advice on proceeding with the divorce.  On one of those distressed and sleepless nights, I came across Stephen’s website and his blog. I was fascinated. What Stephen has written […]

“There’s no hope in hell – I want a divorce!”

April 22, 2024 By Stephen Hedger

So what do you do when the trust is broken so badly that their relationship ends with them selling their family home and moving into separate homes? Most people would consider this the end, but this gentleman decided something different. He wrote to me to see if I could help. I wanted to encourage his […]

Marriage Crisis from Infidelity & Communication Breakdown

August 21, 2023 By Stephen Hedger

Today’s post is about a professional couple in the UK who decided they wanted to share their experience of their tailormade program that was designed to help them out of their marital challenges. They were in crisis due to communication breakdown and infidelity. They had 12 meetings over five months to learn how to reconnect […]

His Marriage was Over!

June 5, 2023 By Stephen Hedger

This man was in the depths of sadness; his marriage was over, but he didn’t want it to be. They had seen numerous counsellors who had all concluded the marriage was indeed over. He had lost all feelings for his wife. Due to being so stuck for so long, he had started an affair. But […]

“Free Marriage in Crisis 8 Page Guide”:

Stephen Hedger is a marriage in crisis specialist sought after by CEO’s Bankers, Judges, GP’s, Business Leaders, Celebrities and Entrepreneurs Globally.


Stephen says when you are in marital crisis it's important to know what to do to make sure your next steps don't make the situation even worse. This short guide written by Stephen is designed to help you take a step back and consider next steps intelligently.


Click to Download FREE

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Recent Clients: New York, Dubai, Los Angeles, Austrailia, Japan, Germany, France, Ireland, UK, Monaco to name a few.

Stephen Hedger offers married couples in crisis across the globe a comprehensive strategic roadmap to overcome their marriage problems.

Today Stephen works with Celebrities, CEO’s, Lawyers, Bankers, Royalty, Judges, and business owners helping them transform their family and personal relationships with massive breakthroughs, seemingly against all odds.

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Recent Posts

  • Do You Know Your Values & Why They Are So Important?
  • “Should I Stay or Go?” Why You Shouldn’t Make Big Decisions While You’re Still Suffering
  • Stop & Never: The 30 Patterns That Quietly Destroy Relationships
  • “How to Fix Communication Issues in a Marriage”
  • “First Step to Fixing Any Marriage Problem”
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*Disclaimer:
Any testimonials stated on this page or on any pages on the Stephen Hedger Marriage Coach website/s are proof of our success, naturally, results may vary from person to person.

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