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Stephen Hedger

Stephen Hedger

Crisis Marriage Coach | Harley Street London

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Behaviours Most Likely To Cause Relationship Problems

I have put together a list of some of the behaviours I see and hear that are likely to cause relationship problems. Yes I did run this list yesterday, but it’s so important to understand. I know some of you missed it!

    1. Couples tell me that love is important all the time, yet when challenged their love is clearly conditional. “I won’t give love unless…they do, or I feel safe, or I feel important, or I feel respected… the list goes on!”
    2. If I give to my partner, what will I get in return? If anyone gives to get, they are trading for what they want and this is guaranteed to kill their sex life dead!
    3. Couples think punishing each other works? Yet it never occurs to them that whenever they are punished they don’t feel more love, so they are killing the relationship bit-by-bit.
    4. Couples don’t create a plan or a direction for their lives together past having children. They then become fearful because of the relationship because it’s going no-where.
    5. Women repeat the same message to their partners over and over again hoping he might understand – he won’t his way of thinking is totally different to a womans.
    6. People spend years getting trained to get a job, but no time understanding how to create a successful relationship. Strange when not being loved is one of the top human fears.
    7. Couples spend average of £15K (average price of a wedding in 2011) getting married and no time or money understanding how to grow it and keep it. Without solid foundations any home will fall down in a storm!
    8. Couples with relationship problems worry about the cost of getting relationship help, but will spend £10,000’s – £100,000’s on a divorce and on-going maintenance fees for years.
    9. Men think that when she’s quiet all is well. He is usually unaware he is living with a live volcano, that will erupt
    10. Some women think he’s a mind reader and should just understand her.!?
    11. Couples understand what values are, until you ask them.
    12. Men think that the power in the relationship is the money, for her it the least important.
    13. Polarity is the most important element in any relationship, yet no one knows what it is!
    14. Reverse polarity most common reason for killing a couples sex life.
    15. Many couples have little idea how to meet each others core needs and then wonder why the intimacy dies.
    16. Number one reason for divorce, loss of intimacy!
    17. The individuals most resistant to seeking help are usually the ones that need it the most.
    18. Men and women are totally different. Most people know this yet don’t understand it so they ignore it.
    19. Many people go into relationships to get their needs met! Then wonder why their needs are not met. There are givers and there are takers, only one of these works.
    20. She thinks he is ignoring her because he no longer loves her. He doesn’t know how to be successful with her so he stays away to protect the relationship.
    21. When the relationship stops meeting the needs of the couple, they automatically go outside the relationship to feel good again.
    22. I don’t know what to do to save my relationship so the best action to take is nothing.
    23. It’s all about me! – Guaranteed path to relationship breakdown.
    24. Relationships should be a natural thing and so if we are in conflict, clearly we are incompatible. After 5 failed relationships and a trail of kids this model might come into question.

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Do You Want
To Save Your Marriage?

Hi, I'm Stephen Hedger. I'm determined to help couples discover what their marriage is capable of with the right information. My only question is, will it be yours?

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About Stephen Hedger

Stephen Hedger is known as the most sought after marriage in crisis specialist in the UK. He is famous for consistently and naturally saving many marriages from divorce. He is a favourite of business leaders, business owners, Judges and celebrities.

Stephen runs his meetings from his office in Harley Street London and supports his global clients over Zoom.

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A 30 minute call with Stephen

In a short phone conversation, Stephen was able to quickly get to the heart of what the real issue was in our marriage – and why in almost a year of working on our marriage including 10 weeks of marriage counselling through a relationship therapy organisation, we weren’t really making any progress. I found Stephen to be extremely perceptive, as well as empathetic to our situation, while being able to quickly pinpoint the real sticking point in our marriage.
Many thanks
Olivia

Dear Stephen
Thank you for your time to listen to my experience in my marriage. You gave me encouragement to speak out to my partner in confidence. You made me realise that sometimes the way we make comments on each other can aggravate the situation and make it worse. Your advice made me feel revived.

Kind regards

Chipo

Success Stories

Client responds to testimonial

November 11, 2021 By Stephen Hedger

I’m working with this lady, and during the session, she wanted to comment on a testimonial another client had left. As you go through today post, you will see what she wanted to say. Before you get to her words, I want to set the context. I’m not quoting her word for word here, but […]

“I was in tears…” 

October 20, 2021 By Stephen Hedger

‘Initially I went to Stephen with a sole focus on saving my marriage as my husband wanted a divorce whilst I felt I could not let go of the 14 years’ relationship without giving it a second chance. My husband was determined to exit and refused to join the Marriage Breakthrough Programme with me, therefore […]

“Lawyer saves relationship alone”!

July 27, 2021 By Stephen Hedger

“I went to see Stephen when my relationship was at breaking point. The final trigger was my partner’s plan to sell his property and move in with me. We had until then a long-distance relationship and never spent more than about a month together (thanks to the COVID lockdown). I had finally moved to his […]

“It was like walking through a minefield blindfolded”

November 29, 2020 By Stephen Hedger

When relationships go wrong the pain can be unbelievable. Today’s post is about a couple whose relationship was quickly out of control and both people thought it was the end. When I first agreed to meet this couple she arrived first.  She was clearly very anxious, eyes darting, wringing hands, unsure if her husband would […]

One small shift changed her mind & saved her marriage – Part 2 of “Should divorce really be the next step?”

May 10, 2020 By Stephen Hedger

What sits at the core of the most successful marriages. What is it that makes the difference. What is it that helps couples stand the test of time? What is it that helps couples make it through all the ups and downs life has to throw at them? Is sex at the core for a […]

Do you want
To Save your Marriage?

Hi, I'm Stephen Hedger. I'm determined to help couples discover what their marriage is capable of with the right information. My only question is, will it be yours?

Learn more

 

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Stephen says when you are in marital crisis it's important to know what to do to make sure your next steps don't make the situation even worse. This short guide written by Stephen is designed to help you take a step back and consider next steps intelligently.

 

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Stephen Hedger offers married couples in crisis across the globe a comprehensive strategic roadmap to overcome their marriage problems. Today Stephen works with Celebrities, CEO’s, Lawyers, Bankers, Royalty, Judges, and business owners helping them transform their family and personal relationships with massive breakthroughs, seemingly against all odds.

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Recent Posts

  • Stop bickering and arguing – Mini Post
  • “Why your marriage may not be broken”
  • “Never attach your meanings to your partner’s words and actions!” – Mini Post
  • “Living with a problem partner” – Mini post
  • “Never be a dream killer” – Mini Post

*Disclaimer:
Any testimonials stated on this page or on any pages on the Stephen Hedger Marriage Coach website/s are proof of our success, naturally, results may vary from person to person.

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