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Stephen Hedger

Stephen Hedger

Crisis Marriage Coach | Harley Street London

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Help Emergency!

A Psychologist and her husband a Property Developer came to me for emergency help.

They were on the edge of divorce and needed a crisis specialist to help them understand the best next steps.

They were full of confusion and questions.

Should we stay together? Should we part? What about separation?

They were concerned about their children they were afraid and confused with so much at stake.

They couldn’t see a safe path to take and were paralysed and stressed because being stuck was also not an option.

They were both exhausted.

I firstly helped them to slow down

The key was not to make a reflex decision it was important to step back and gain the right answers so they could choose the next steps intelligently.

So I took them through a process not to fix their marriage, but to help them understand their problems properly and help them discover what they were capable of achieving once they understood what had happened and why.

It was quite a journey with many parts

At the start of this process, they both struggled to be in the same room and divorce was a very real option.

Both of them were protecting yourselves from each other and their marriage couldn’t sustain that pattern so they hit crisis.

Their love was essentially dead and it was only the fact they had children was keeping them together.

They lost connection with themselves

You see the biggest challenge they both faced wasn’t just their connection with each other although that did need attention as there were challenges with communication, needs, and attraction.

The starting point was they had both lost connection with who they both really are when they were together.

This made them both miserable and they both attached that pain to each other and blamed the marriage.

That process of being disconnected from themselves made them naturally incompatible.

BUT isn’t everyone who isn’t themselves with their partner incompatible in those moments.

Their problem was they became very good at practising not being themselves with each other so they created a pattern called “incompatibility” and it lead them both to an illusion.

The illusion was the marriage was over and that feeling was leading them both to a dead-end.

What they had lost was the understanding and ability to become the love they both told me was so important to them.

That was one of the root reasons for the pain they were both in.

So helping them both to feel safe to love each other was an important part of their solution.

To start with their connection had to be made safe.

Once the couple were out of self-focused survival mode, they were then able to look at what their partner needed and why.

This not only solidified their connection it also created a safe place for them to be together emotionally.

Now we could focus on attraction

That created the way to develop what equals attraction for them as a couple and they both discovered how to develop the masculine and feminine energies so in almost every action or conversation that energy of difference was present.

Now the differences were seen as strengths rather than a place of disconnect.

That meant staying sexually connected was not a massive shift in energy, because they learnt how to keep that energy bubbling.

What we were looking to achieve is they both had the understanding of how to show up in the marriage, so both understood how to become effective influencers.

Essentially triggering each other to experience emotions they both wanted.

The key to successfully helping a couple out of crisis is in the strategy of how to take a two very different people out of their crisis and into far safer new state of connection and contribution.

Category iconMarriage Coaching

"Follow simple yet powerful steps designed to save and reignite a marriage fast no matter what has happened"

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Recent Posts

  • “Needy and not needed!”
  • “Discover the No.1 Philosophy of Highly Effective Spouses: From Struggle to Success”
  • “Unveiling the Secrets: How I Mastered the Art of Resolving Relationship Issues”
  • 3 Foundations for a Healthy Marriage
  • Misdiagnosis – Divorce Prevention Part 3
  • The Divorce Path – Divorce Prevention Part 2
  • Mistakes that lead couples to Divorce – Part 1
  • Can’t live with you. Can’t live without you!
  • When a marriage breaks down – What do I do?
  • Marriage is a dance – A dance most couples kill
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  • Anyone that marries will have trouble!
  • “Identity Secrets”- Mini Post
  • Committing to Personal Integrity – Mini Post
  • Men are afraid – Mini Post
  • Are you in a trading relationship? – Mini post
  • Communicating with MEN – Mini Post
  • From Stephen Hedger to you…
  • “Divorce won’t solve this…” – Mini Post

Over 1000 Relationship Articles

Categories

  • A thought for Sunday
  • Communication
  • Destructive Patterns
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  • Infidelity-Affairs
  • Loss of Love
  • Loss of passion
  • Lost Attraction
  • Marriage Coaching
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  • Retirement Crisis
  • Save Marriage Alone
  • Separation & Divorce
  • Stop & Never – Mini Posts
  • Stuck
  • Testimonials
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Primary Sidebar

I’m not going to ask you how you “feel", pay me to watch you argue, or try to find the person to blame.

I am looking to discover if the couple can become a team, overcome their problems together and create a dynamic that will create a loving and passionate life together.

My approach is to take you from where you are, to where you want to be… fast!

I can not recommend Stephen highly enough – he not only saved our marriage, but has improved my marriage and myself as a person.

Banker - London

Popular Posts

  • Women are struggling, but men don’t understand why
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  • 36 Principles For Success
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  • A Wise Old Man's Decision
  • I was in tears
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Do You Want
To Save Your Marriage?

Hi, I'm Stephen Hedger. I'm determined to help couples discover what their marriage is capable of with the right information. My only question is, will it be yours?

Learn more

A 30 minute call with Stephen

In a short phone conversation, Stephen was able to quickly get to the heart of what the real issue was in our marriage – and why in almost a year of working on our marriage including 10 weeks of marriage counselling through a relationship therapy organisation, we weren’t really making any progress. I found Stephen to be extremely perceptive, as well as empathetic to our situation, while being able to quickly pinpoint the real sticking point in our marriage.
Many thanks
Olivia

Dear Stephen
Thank you for your time to listen to my experience in my marriage. You gave me encouragement to speak out to my partner in confidence. You made me realise that sometimes the way we make comments on each other can aggravate the situation and make it worse. Your advice made me feel revived.

Kind regards

Chipo

Success Stories

Client responds to testimonial

November 11, 2021 By Stephen Hedger

I’m working with this lady, and during the session, she wanted to comment on a testimonial another client had left. As you go through today post, you will see what she wanted to say. Before you get to her words, I want to set the context. I’m not quoting her word for word here, but […]

“I was in tears…” 

October 20, 2021 By Stephen Hedger

‘Initially I went to Stephen with a sole focus on saving my marriage as my husband wanted a divorce whilst I felt I could not let go of the 14 years’ relationship without giving it a second chance. My husband was determined to exit and refused to join the Marriage Breakthrough Programme with me, therefore […]

“Lawyer saves relationship alone”!

July 27, 2021 By Stephen Hedger

“I went to see Stephen when my relationship was at breaking point. The final trigger was my partner’s plan to sell his property and move in with me. We had until then a long-distance relationship and never spent more than about a month together (thanks to the COVID lockdown). I had finally moved to his […]

“It was like walking through a minefield blindfolded”

November 29, 2020 By Stephen Hedger

When relationships go wrong the pain can be unbelievable. Today’s post is about a couple whose relationship was quickly out of control and both people thought it was the end. When I first agreed to meet this couple she arrived first.  She was clearly very anxious, eyes darting, wringing hands, unsure if her husband would […]

One small shift changed her mind & saved her marriage – Part 2 of “Should divorce really be the next step?”

May 10, 2020 By Stephen Hedger

What sits at the core of the most successful marriages. What is it that makes the difference. What is it that helps couples stand the test of time? What is it that helps couples make it through all the ups and downs life has to throw at them? Is sex at the core for a […]

Do you want
To Save your Marriage?

Hi, I'm Stephen Hedger. I'm determined to help couples discover what their marriage is capable of with the right information. My only question is, will it be yours?

Learn more

 

“Free Marriage in Crisis 8 Page Guide”:

Stephen Hedger is a marriage in crisis specialist sought after by CEO’s Bankers, Judges, GP’s, Business Leaders, A List Celebrities and Entrepreneurs Globally


Stephen says when you are in marital crisis it's important to know what to do to make sure your next steps don't make the situation even worse. This short guide written by Stephen is designed to help you take a step back and consider next steps intelligently.

 

Click to Download FREE

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+44 (0)845 519 4808


Head Office
10 Harley Street
London
W1G 9PF

Stephen Hedger offers married couples in crisis across the globe a comprehensive strategic roadmap to overcome their marriage problems. Today Stephen works with Celebrities, CEO’s, Lawyers, Bankers, Royalty, Judges, and business owners helping them transform their family and personal relationships with massive breakthroughs, seemingly against all odds.

  • Marriage Counselling Alternative
  • Cloe Hedger (Stephen’s wife)
  • Marriage Breakthrough Program
  • Individual Coaching
  • About
  • Success Stories
  • Over 1000 Articles
  • FAQs
  • Mission: Vision: Values:

Recent Posts

  • “Needy and not needed!”
  • “Discover the No.1 Philosophy of Highly Effective Spouses: From Struggle to Success”
  • “Unveiling the Secrets: How I Mastered the Art of Resolving Relationship Issues”
  • 3 Foundations for a Healthy Marriage
  • Misdiagnosis – Divorce Prevention Part 3

*Disclaimer:
Any testimonials stated on this page or on any pages on the Stephen Hedger Marriage Coach website/s are proof of our success, naturally, results may vary from person to person.

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