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Stephen Hedger

Stephen Hedger

Crisis Marriage Coach | Harley Street London

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Improve Self Confidence – Steps To Self Confidence

I have “no confidence in myself”, “lack of confidence is holding back my life” “if only I could develop a supreme self confidence in myself then I would be free”.

Does this sound familiar to you? If you are suffering from a lack of confidence in some or all areas of your life, Would you like to improve self confidence in you?

Improving self confidence

What’s interesting about confidence is people can find themselves really confident in certain situations, but very unconfident in others.

For example: I might be working with a successful senior executive commanding 1000’s of people in a high stress environment, but he has no confidence in his ability in personal relationships.

Or I maybe working with a performer who is oozing confidence on stage, but at home is like a mouse pushed around, and runs around pleasing everyone except themselves.

I have some clients create very small worlds they know their job, they have few friends and never step out of their comfort zones. They do this to keep safe, but this actually creates a self-imposed prison in this place their lack of confidence becomes self-fulfilling.

Improving self-confidence is about a combination of factors, what we are really after is the confidence to be able to be who we want to be in any situation.

Our confidence really sits in our ability to be comfortable with the unexpected to stay true to who we are and be comfortable we know how to deal with whatever happens.

For example: If you were public speaking and you knew your subject inside out and you knew that no matter what was thrown at you during your speech you would be able to answer. Your confidence would be much higher.

Same with relationships, if you knew that no matter what happened you could always put it right then again your confidence would be significantly higher.

How to get confidence in yourself – Be a resource for yourself

If you want to get confidence in yourself become an expert in your chosen direction(s).

You could be

  • An expert mum
  • An expert public speaker
  • An expert in building loving relationships
  • An expert in socialising

If it’s important to your life, find out how you can be the best you can be in that area.

How to improve your self image

A big part of your confidence building strategy is understanding how you see you. How you see yourself is critical in the process of your confidence in you.

If you believe you are not confident in certain areas of life, what happens is when you find yourself in a situation that is uncomfortable your internal thoughts are automatically fired up. This is the start of a fear response which feels very uncomfortable.

Blushing, shaking, knotted stomach, tense shoulders, heavy heart, feeling of wanting to run, or escape all typical symptoms of poor self image and a lack of confidence in that situation.

You see if anyone thinks that they will be harmed in a situation they will always move away from it.

Improving self confidence step-by-step

If you want to improve your confidence in you then you have to understand the factors that will create it.

  1. Set your goals – what do you want and why do you want it!
  2. Understand your blocks and why you have them
  3. Break through your blocks
  4. Don’t be swayed by the judgment of others
  5. Become an expert
  6. Stay focused on your outcome

Build Confidence in yourself

What you will notice about really confident people is they are never internally focused, in other words they are never focused on themselves. They trust themselves to react in ways which serve them and are not worried about what others think about them, because they know they can’t control the thoughts and actions of other.

The biggest confidence boosters used by those at the top is the ability to stay focused externally and on their goal, in other words where they are going.

Confidence Coaching:  with Stephen Hedger

Self Confidence Training is a step-by-step process to help you become who you were designed to be, minus the fears. So what do you want to be more confident in?

  • Relationship(s)?
  • Public speaking?
  • Business – Career?
  • Social situations?
  • All areas of life?
  • Whatever it is for you i can help

You will learn –

  • Confidence building techniques to build a foundation of trust and security within you
  • How to build up confidence where ever you feel you need it
  • How to gain self confidence to free yourself from your blocks/fears faster
  • Develop self confidence in all areas of your life
  • Increase confidence as and when you need it

If you are interested in working with me to gain confidence in your future please get in touch.

  • About
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Stephen Hedger
Stephen Hedger
About the author:

Harley Street Expert | Founder & High Performance Coach

With two decades of experience helping couples out of crisis, Stephen the founder of The Marriage Breakthrough Program, uses his proven system for rescuing and rebuilding relationships on the edge of divorce. A trusted advisor to CEOs, entrepreneurs, and industry leaders globally, his work blends emotional intelligence with strategic clarity. Known for navigating highly complex relationship challenges, Stephen helps individuals and couples find clarity and direction when everything is at stake.

Click to find out more >>> The Marriage Breakthrough Program
Stephen Hedger
Latest posts by Stephen Hedger (see all)
  • How can we tell if we are heading for divorce? - October 19, 2025
  • Why does a woman that loves her husband have multiple affairs? - July 15, 2025
  • Loss of Love? How to Save Your Relationship - June 26, 2025

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Recent Case Studies

Case Study: She Was a Trained Counsellor. But Knowing What Was Wrong Wasn’t Saving Their Marriage

July 31, 2026 By Stephen Hedger

How Richard and Claire moved from preparing for separation to becoming a team against the pattern damaging their family. Richard and Claire’s names have been changed to protect their privacy. This Case Study at a Glance Clients: Married couple with two children. Claire was a trained counsellor. Starting position: Trust had almost disappeared. They were caught in […]

Case Study: She Didn’t Fall Out of Love. She Stopped Recognising Herself.

July 28, 2026 By Stephen Hedger

The hidden reason behind a six-year affair – and why the affair was never the real problem. Quick Summary Clients: David (53) and Claire (50) Married: 28 years Together since: Their teenage years Children: Two Challenge: Claire had been having an affair for six years. David believed the affair had destroyed their marriage. Claire insisted she still loved her husband […]

Case Study: They Thought They Were Arguing About the Little Things. They Weren’t.

July 25, 2026 By Stephen Hedger

How one couple stopped constant bickering when they discovered the expectations hiding underneath it Names and identifying details have been changed. By the time Mark and Rachel came to see me, they were exhausted with each other. They weren’t having enormous arguments about affairs, money or whether to stay married. They were arguing about the […]

Case Study: Her Husband Was Preparing to Move Out. So She Stopped Waiting for Him to Change.

July 21, 2026 By Stephen Hedger

Can one person begin changing a marriage when their partner is no longer convinced it can be saved? This clients story shows what happened when one woman stopped trying to persuade her husband and began changing the part of the relationship she could influence. Quick Summary ClientsA professional couple, married for approximately seven years. ChallengeHer […]

Case Study: He Built a Life for His Family. He Also Taught His Wife How to Live Without Him.

July 17, 2026 By Stephen Hedger

When James finally made his marriage a priority, Emma had already learned not to rely on him. When James began coming home earlier, he expected Emma to be pleased. Years before, she had repeatedly asked him to spend less time at work. Now he was protecting his evenings, turning down calls and making more time […]

Recent Posts

  • She Was Certain Divorce Was the Answer. Then the Same Problem Appeared in Her Next Relationship.
  • Why Do We Keep Creating a Relationship Neither of Us Wants?
  • Are You Making Things Better or Worse in Your Marriage?
  • Before You Decide Whether to Save Your Marriage or Leave It, Read This
  • A Marriage Dies From Thousands of Cuts

Categories

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  • Case Studies (16)
  • Communication (71)
  • Destructive Patterns (138)
  • Discussion (2)
  • Infidelity-Affairs (43)
  • Loss of Love (44)
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  • Retirement Crisis (6)
  • Save Marriage Alone (48)
  • Separation & Divorce (34)
  • Stop & Never – Mini Posts (54)
  • Stuck (9)
  • Testimonials (74)
  • Top 10 Popular Posts (12)
  • Uncategorized (744)

Primary Sidebar

I’m not going to ask you how you “feel", pay me to watch you argue, or try to find the person to blame.

I am looking to discover if the couple can become a team, overcome their problems together and create a dynamic that will create a loving and passionate life together.

My approach is to take you from where you are, to where you want to be… fast!

I can not recommend Stephen highly enough – he not only saved our marriage, but has improved my marriage and myself as a person.

Banker - London

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Do You Want
To Save Your Marriage?

Hi, I'm Stephen Hedger. I'm determined to help couples discover what their marriage is capable of with the right information. My only question is, will it be yours?

Learn more

A 30 minute call with Stephen

In a short phone conversation, Stephen was able to quickly get to the heart of what the real issue was in our marriage – and why in almost a year of working on our marriage including 10 weeks of marriage counselling through a relationship therapy organisation, we weren’t really making any progress. I found Stephen to be extremely perceptive, as well as empathetic to our situation, while being able to quickly pinpoint the real sticking point in our marriage.
Many thanks
Olivia

Dear Stephen
Thank you for your time to listen to my experience in my marriage. You gave me encouragement to speak out to my partner in confidence. You made me realise that sometimes the way we make comments on each other can aggravate the situation and make it worse. Your advice made me feel revived.

Kind regards

Chipo

Success Stories

Why does a woman that loves her husband have multiple affairs?

July 15, 2025 By Stephen Hedger

This gentleman had just found out his wife was guilty of another infidelity and was now at the end of the road. He had tried to forgive her before, but this time in terrible pain, he couldn’t see a way forward and was now planning his divorce. His wife came to me looking for a […]

Please Save Our Marriage! – Testimonial

March 1, 2025 By Stephen Hedger

Please Save Our Marriage! This was the first email I recieved from Darren and Sue, they were at breaking point. When they first entered my clinic you could cut the atmosphere with a knife. This was a couple with young children on the edge, breaking up seemed like the only option open to them… Sue […]

From Battlefield to Breakthrough: How to Save Your Marriage Without a Toxic Fight.

January 31, 2025 By Stephen Hedger

Most people who come to me for help believe their marriage is broken, so their level of hope is not high. Many will have tried to fix the problems without success. These people are unaware that there is a critical mindset shift: if you don’t make it, your chances of success dramatically drop. As you […]

“By changing yourself, you can change a relationship… because I did!”

September 16, 2024 By Stephen Hedger

We were in the process of physical separation, with my husband arranging to move out at the end of the month, and I was getting legal advice on proceeding with the divorce.  On one of those distressed and sleepless nights, I came across Stephen’s website and his blog. I was fascinated. What Stephen has written […]

“There’s no hope in hell – I want a divorce!”

April 22, 2024 By Stephen Hedger

So what do you do when the trust is broken so badly that their relationship ends with them selling their family home and moving into separate homes? Most people would consider this the end, but this gentleman decided something different. He wrote to me to see if I could help. I wanted to encourage his […]

Is Your Marriage Breaking Down?

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Head Office
Harley Street
London
W1G 9PF
United Kingdom



Recent Clients: Scotland, Ireland, Texas, New York, Dubai, Los Angeles, Australia, Japan, Germany, France, Ireland, UK, Monaco to name a few.

Stephen Hedger offers married couples in crisis across the globe a comprehensive strategic roadmap to overcome their marriage problems.

Today Stephen works with Celebrities, CEO’s, Lawyers, Bankers, Royalty, Judges, and business owners helping them transform their family and personal relationships with massive breakthroughs, seemingly against all odds.

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Recent Posts

  • She Was Certain Divorce Was the Answer. Then the Same Problem Appeared in Her Next Relationship.
  • Why Do We Keep Creating a Relationship Neither of Us Wants?
  • Are You Making Things Better or Worse in Your Marriage?
  • Before You Decide Whether to Save Your Marriage or Leave It, Read This
  • A Marriage Dies From Thousands of Cuts

*Disclaimer:
Any testimonials stated on this page or on any pages on the Stephen Hedger Marriage Coach website/s are proof of our success, naturally, results may vary from person to person.

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