Most woman reading this will share this view “Women Want A Real Man” and in their mind have their own version of what that means. What she thinks and feels, needs to be respected and most of all listened to.
I speak to many men in my sessions. They want to be able to make her happy; they feel they suffer inside when they feel they can’t, or they feel they have tried and tried, but it’s hopeless.
So with these two desires, her wanting to be loved in the way she wants and him with the burning desire to please her and make her happy this should be easy, RIGHT? You’d think!
So, let’s go some way to define what a Real Man is from a woman’s perspective.
Many women I speak to want a man who will help them feel safe and free to be their authentic selves in the relationship.
This does not mean money. Yes, it feels good to have financial security, but this is not her direct connection to love. Her connection to love comes from his emotional intelligence, desire to understand her, and willingness to take action to support her needs.
She needs a connection to herself that she enjoys when she is with him and a connection to him that brings her the energy and spark that makes their connection unique.
She needs this love, care, and support from him in many ways, and every woman is unique. But she wants to know if the man cares enough to find out – she wants a man who is willing to learn her.
She also wants to know she is the most important person in the world to him.
If she feels his ***MOTHER***, another ***WOMAN***, his JOB, and his friends are more important, then trouble will never be far away.
It is dangerous if he assumes she knows she is important because she has to experience it to feel it.
Women do want attention from the man they love. But they are not unreasonable about it and it’s so easy to do, for her it’s the little things that make the world of difference for her.
She wants to feel that love from a man that is true and genuine.
She wants to have time to connect with him so being present with her is critical. Just the simple act of looking deep into her eyes and loving her no matter what is happening is one of man’s most powerful tools.
An attractive man for her then works with her to help her not only become the person she wants to be, but in the future that she wants to have. So together, you must design a wonderful future and work as a team to achieve those goals.
You see, the way a man GIVES to her makes the difference.
A real man has the emotional strength to help her feel safe to bring out in her the real woman in her. The mans reward for consistently doing this, is he will get back from her a powerful desire to make him feel like the man he has always wanted to be.
A real man is one who serves and protects his partner. In other words, he gives her what she needs and keeps her safe so that she can connect to herself when she is with him.
A real man will see when she is in emotional pain and be there for her, loving her without judging her or making her wrong.
A weak man does not see her pain; he is focused on how he feels. He judges her and makes her wrong.
- If a man does this, the relationship will start to DIE!
A woman is not designed to be the protector of the man, but she will be the protector of the relationship, so if SHE feels that HE is NOT strong enough emotionally, SHE has no choice; she will get strong because she has to and will then see her man now as a BOY, feminine or weak.
Even if he earns millions a year, the money does not make him masculine or strong. In her eyes, if she is not cared for emotionally, she will have to care for herself and the point of him will be lost.
The money is therefore worthless in emotional terms. So if a man thinks he gives her everything and that everything is attached some way to money he is going to fail fast.
This weakness in him is NOT sexually appealing to her, so intimacy can stop very quickly or become very difficult. Plus, she will resent him and lose respect for him. She may still love him, but the love is now different because she now has to become the man in the relationship.
A Real Man is a giver, a protector and serves his partner every day with what she actually needs, not what he thinks she needs, what she needs because he has taken time to find out.
Real men become detectives and find out what she needs because it is the only way to look after her.
When a man does this in the way that feels wonderful to her, SHE will stop at nothing to help him feel like the man he has always wanted to be. You see understanding and giving love is the answer.
What’s most important is a man has to be relentless and consistent, he can’t be wonderful for a few days not get the reaction he wants and then blame her. Where is the strength in that, if love is important, it is important “all of the time” and not some of the time.
So the question is this: Is a real man living in your relationship?
- Read more: This is Making Men Unattractive.
Harley Street Expert | Founder & High Performance Coach
With two decades of experience helping couples out of crisis, Stephen the founder of The Marriage Breakthrough Program, uses his proven system for rescuing and rebuilding relationships on the edge of divorce. A trusted advisor to CEOs, entrepreneurs, and industry leaders globally, his work blends emotional intelligence with strategic clarity. Known for navigating highly complex relationship challenges, Stephen helps individuals and couples find clarity and direction when everything is at stake.
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