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Stephen Hedger

Stephen Hedger

Crisis Marriage Coach | Harley Street London

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My Wife Has Fallen Out Of Love With Me Please Help

She told him the marriage was over, she had lost all feelings for him. He knew there were problems, but was totally shocked at her sudden desire to want to end the marriage.

They had a child together, and were torn with what to do; they sought help. She was convinced the marriage was over, but driven by guilt she felt she owed it to her son to try one last time. Her efforts, however, seemed half-hearted as she shifted between, resigned, cold and sad almost at the same time.

He came to me on his own initially, he wanted the very best service I could offer to help them. He didn’t believe the marriage was over and he told me he would throw all he could at saving his family.

I explained to him that I do run intensive programs for Marriages in Crisis.

I evaluated the couple before I decided to invite them in. I knew he was committed, but I had to be convinced that she wanted to discover what had happened to them.

I believed even though she thought the marriage was over I felt she still loved him, but couldn’t work out how they could live together, so had detached from him to protect herself.

Their son was also being affected by their problems and was having problems at school. The couple were shocked to discover how much their son was being affected.

I told them I was happy for them to enter my Marriage Program, but the focus was on the understanding that we were not just trying to fix a broken marriage.

The goal was to discover if the marriage could work long-term? This meant both people happy not one happy at the cost of the other.

I was aware of her concerns that any changes would be a short-term act on his part due to his passion to save the marriage at all cost. She was also concerned that even if I did get them back together, what would stop their problems from happening all over again.

Her biggest block was that her feelings had gone for her husband and she didn’t feel she loved him anymore. She was crystal clear that she would not live in a loveless marriage – I totally agreed.

Respecting both peoples emotional position I started gathering information, specifically looking for the key to how did two people who fell in love become successful at destroyed their marriage.

We discovered that both people had very little understanding of each other core needs and what had to happen for them to be happy.

So they had made assumptions, guesses at how to help each other to be happy. This resulted in many failures and disappointments.

They had quickly created fear in each other which resulted in arguments that went around in circles both blaming the other.

She quickly realised that if she argued or complained at him he would just become more aggressive. So she stopped, not because she was happy again, but because when she was honest about how she felt he attacked her.

He assumed she was happier now the world was calmer, the reality was she was shutting down and her feelings for him were dying.

He felt she had become someone that was negative and impossible to please to someone who was now calmer if not slightly distant.

This was better for him than the arguments, what he hadn’t realised was she had given up on him because she knew she had to protect herself.

This shift in her had two effects, she stopped her feelings and expectations of him, but she also became depressed.

She no longer felt herself, and he just threw himself into his work.

The marriage was no longer meeting the couple’s needs, and she had lost all faith in a happy future with him.

The trust had died in both of them and without trust, the relationship can’t function.

We discovered she had trust challenges from her past, and he feared rejection and reacted badly to it.

Over the next 90 days, the couple visited me weekly to learn why their relationship had stopped working, and each week they were given new levels of understanding and tools, they could use and practice which would make a significant difference to how they felt about each other and the relationship.

Over the weeks, the stress started to reduce, and the couple started to understand each other differently.

They discovered each other’s strengths and used those to support each other and encourage their partner when they struggled.

They learnt why they had lost their intimacy and what had to happen for it to return.

They learnt how they had, over time turned into different versions of themselves and fear was driving their behaviours.

They learnt how to grow through their conflict through honesty, and patience. A simple shift in understanding what was really happening when they fought helped them support each other.

They also learnt how to plan their future and how to maintain their marriage through daily, weekly, and monthly practices.

They both also discovered the myths that surround relationships and how destructive those myths can be.

The shift in focus was significant and kept this family together. More importantly, this couple now has the tools needed to help their son avoid the problems they faced.

I hope that if you are experiencing challenges, you can see that no matter how bad it seems, with the right resources and focus, many marriages can be saved from divorce.

Loss of Love? How to Save Your Relationship
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Stephen Hedger
Stephen Hedger
About the author:

Harley Street Expert | Founder & High Performance Coach

With two decades of experience helping couples out of crisis, Stephen the founder of The Marriage Breakthrough Program, uses his proven system for rescuing and rebuilding relationships on the edge of divorce. A trusted advisor to CEOs, entrepreneurs, and industry leaders globally, his work blends emotional intelligence with strategic clarity. Known for navigating highly complex relationship challenges, Stephen helps individuals and couples find clarity and direction when everything is at stake.

Click to find out more >>> The Marriage Breakthrough Program
Stephen Hedger
Latest posts by Stephen Hedger (see all)
  • Why does a woman that loves her husband have multiple affairs? - July 15, 2025
  • Loss of Love? How to Save Your Relationship - June 26, 2025
  • Passionless Marriage: “Sex life dying – want to know why?” - June 26, 2025

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Recent Posts

  • Why does a woman that loves her husband have multiple affairs?
  • “The One Shift Everyone Must Know”
  • What If You Knew the Exact Mistakes That Destroy Marriages?
  • “What Do You Hear When I Speak?”
  • Your Marriage Isn’t Broken — The Pattern Is. Here’s How to Fix It.
  • The 5C Marriage Blueprint: The Foundation Every Relationship Needs to Thrive
  • The Silent Killer of Marriages: When You Stop Being You
  • Emotional Intimacy in Marriage: The Key to Trust, Connection, and Lasting Passion
  • Please Save Our Marriage – My Wife has Asked for a Divorce
  • Loss of Love? How to Save Your Relationship
  • Passionless Marriage: “Sex life dying – want to know why?”

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I’m not going to ask you how you “feel", pay me to watch you argue, or try to find the person to blame.

I am looking to discover if the couple can become a team, overcome their problems together and create a dynamic that will create a loving and passionate life together.

My approach is to take you from where you are, to where you want to be… fast!

I can not recommend Stephen highly enough – he not only saved our marriage, but has improved my marriage and myself as a person.

Banker - London

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Do You Want
To Save Your Marriage?

Hi, I'm Stephen Hedger. I'm determined to help couples discover what their marriage is capable of with the right information. My only question is, will it be yours?

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A 30 minute call with Stephen

In a short phone conversation, Stephen was able to quickly get to the heart of what the real issue was in our marriage – and why in almost a year of working on our marriage including 10 weeks of marriage counselling through a relationship therapy organisation, we weren’t really making any progress. I found Stephen to be extremely perceptive, as well as empathetic to our situation, while being able to quickly pinpoint the real sticking point in our marriage.
Many thanks
Olivia

Dear Stephen
Thank you for your time to listen to my experience in my marriage. You gave me encouragement to speak out to my partner in confidence. You made me realise that sometimes the way we make comments on each other can aggravate the situation and make it worse. Your advice made me feel revived.

Kind regards

Chipo

Success Stories

Why does a woman that loves her husband have multiple affairs?

July 15, 2025 By Stephen Hedger

This gentleman had just found out his wife was guilty of another infidelity and was now at the end of the road. He had tried to forgive her before, but this time in terrible pain, he couldn’t see a way forward and was now planning his divorce. His wife came to me looking for a […]

From Battlefield to Breakthrough: How to Save Your Marriage Without a Toxic Fight.

January 31, 2025 By Stephen Hedger

Most people who come to me for help believe their marriage is broken, so their level of hope is not high. Many will have tried to fix the problems without success. These people are unaware that there is a critical mindset shift: if you don’t make it, your chances of success dramatically drop. As you […]

“By changing yourself, you can change a relationship… because I did!”

September 16, 2024 By Stephen Hedger

We were in the process of physical separation, with my husband arranging to move out at the end of the month, and I was getting legal advice on proceeding with the divorce.  On one of those distressed and sleepless nights, I came across Stephen’s website and his blog. I was fascinated. What Stephen has written […]

“There’s no hope in hell – I want a divorce!”

April 22, 2024 By Stephen Hedger

So what do you do when the trust is broken so badly that their relationship ends with them selling their family home and moving into separate homes? Most people would consider this the end, but this gentleman decided something different. He wrote to me to see if I could help. I wanted to encourage his […]

Marriage Crisis from Infidelity & Communication Breakdown

August 21, 2023 By Stephen Hedger

Today’s post is about a professional couple in the UK who decided they wanted to share their experience of their tailormade program that was designed to help them out of their marital challenges. They were in crisis due to communication breakdown and infidelity. They had 12 meetings over five months to learn how to reconnect […]

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Recent Clients: Scotland, Ireland, Texas, New York, Dubai, Los Angeles, Austrailia, Japan, Germany, France, Ireland, UK, Monaco to name a few.

Stephen Hedger offers married couples in crisis across the globe a comprehensive strategic roadmap to overcome their marriage problems.

Today Stephen works with Celebrities, CEO’s, Lawyers, Bankers, Royalty, Judges, and business owners helping them transform their family and personal relationships with massive breakthroughs, seemingly against all odds.

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Recent Posts

  • Why does a woman that loves her husband have multiple affairs?
  • “The One Shift Everyone Must Know”
  • What If You Knew the Exact Mistakes That Destroy Marriages?
  • “What Do You Hear When I Speak?”
  • Your Marriage Isn’t Broken — The Pattern Is. Here’s How to Fix It.

*Disclaimer:
Any testimonials stated on this page or on any pages on the Stephen Hedger Marriage Coach website/s are proof of our success, naturally, results may vary from person to person.

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