One of the causes of relationship and marriage problems is when a person is focused on themselves for more and more of the relationship.
There are some times you have to focus on you of course, but life is about balance. I for example am very focused on my personal growth, to do this I do have to focus on me, but I’m mindful that this does not take over and my focus goes to giving what my wife Cloe needs.
So below are some examples, but whenever you are focused on you especially when you are together or communicating you are going to have a problem.
This can take the form of…
- A focus on what you are not getting.
- How you are feeling based on what their partner say or does.
- When you judge your partner.
- When you pull away.
- When you protect yourself from you partner emotionally.
A successful relationship is NOT about taking and manipulating what you need. To be successful you have to give, if you are focused on yourself you are not a team.
You can’t judge your partner because that would mean you understood how they created their feelings that resulted in their actions, that would be impossible.
So if they seem to be upset or angry don’t judge them, help them, after all remember you both have the same goal you just want to be happy and loved.