The following questions and answers point towards something important see if you can guess what it is…
- Why won’t you give love to your partner? Because I don’t get it back!
- Why are you dating? I want to find a man to help me with my children!
- Why do you think you are in love with him? Because of all the things he does for me!
- What drove you to have an affair? She gives so much and makes me feel important unlike my wife!
- Why is a relationship important to you? I don’t want to be alone.
Did you spot the common thread with each person?
Each person was focused on themselves and what they are getting. When things go wrong their focus is likely to be focused on what they are not getting.
If you are focused on what a relationship can give you, the chance of it failing are dramatically increased.
If you are focus on what you can give to a relationship now we have a real chance of success on many levels.
You see ironically the more you give to your relationship the more you’ll get back. Of course you have to give what your partner really wants. No point giving what you think they want you could prove you don’t understand them.
In my experience if you give consistently through understanding you’ll get back 10 times what you put in.
So the model is simple, never give to get, give because you are a giving person!
The irony is the giving person always ends up with far more than the selfish one.