• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer

New Clients: +44 (0)845 519 4808

Existing Clients +44 (0)20 3793 2829

Stephen Hedger

Stephen Hedger

Crisis Marriage Coach | Harley Street London

  • Get The Book
  • Marriage Breakthrough Program
    • FAQ
  • Clients Success
  • About
  • Blog
    • Marriage Blueprint
    • Saving a Marriage Alone
    • Communication problems
    • Infidelity
    • Loss of Love
    • Loss of Passion
    • Separation Divorce

What Happened To Our Playful Passion?

When couples experience challenges in their relationship one of the first things to die is their intimacy and with it goes the fun and the playful passionate side of their relationship.

Is this where you are? If it is, then you will have a strong feeling that life is not how it is meant to be. You know things have to change, but maybe you’re stuck not knowing what to change.

In my session I see couples in trouble every day and what I consistently see is their spark has gone, there is little fun or joy in the relationship. Life has become very serious and the only place to get any kind of joy or fun is now outside of the relationship with friends family or at work.

Intimacy is the difference between being just good friends or lovers. If you are in a relationship then being just good friends is not going to be enough. So the goal has to be to get the intimacy back and for that to happen the playful passion has to be there.

The hurdles to getting the playful passion back

There are two key things that have to happen if you are going to get you relationship back on track.

The first is understanding

When the individuals in the relationship don’t feel understood then they start to feel fear in the relationship. Both men and women can feel this, but for totally different reasons.

Fundamentally men and women communicate differently and so the translation of each others words can be totally different to what was intended.

Men and women also experience the world differently too, we are designed for totally different things so our perspectives are different.

So with so many differences in gender combined with totally different histories is not difficult to understand why couple fail to understand each other.

So the goal is to understand each other and to do it without judgement, a lot of couple have the misconception they are qualified to judged each other, of course they are not.

The second key element is meeting each other needs

In every session I have with couples when the needs are not being met in the relationship the relationship will have stopped growing and will be dying on some level.

Of course if the couple don’t understand each other (the first step) then the desire to meet each others needs st0ps being important. If the desire to meet each other needs goes, now the individuals stop seeing each other as a source of pleasure and are in the process of seeing each other as a source of pain.

This puts a serious spin on the relationship and fear is now the focus, a far cry from the playful passion we are all after.

So now the problem is escalating and moving the couple away from the playful passion they once shared.

Without the understanding the couple needs to feel safe with each other, combined with the lack of desire the couple now feels to meet each others needs, resentment is now sat in the relationship.

If that resentment stays for too long it will turn into a lack of respect and from here the relationship is vulnerable to many destructive paths.

Now you understand the path to success and the importance of getting this right, what are you going to do? Wait for your relationship to die or are you going to take control?

Remember when you act understand what you are trying to achieve and what feelings are you wanting your partner to attach to you?

Punishing and making your partner wrong will help them to move further away from you.

Just maybe they are as fearful as you, maybe they too have good intentions, but are just lost with how to make this work just like you.

If you need my help you know what to do…

  • About
  • Latest Posts
Stephen Hedger
Stephen Hedger
About the author:

Harley Street Expert | Founder & High Performance Coach

With two decades of experience helping couples out of crisis, Stephen the founder of The Marriage Breakthrough Program, uses his proven system for rescuing and rebuilding relationships on the edge of divorce. A trusted advisor to CEOs, entrepreneurs, and industry leaders globally, his work blends emotional intelligence with strategic clarity. Known for navigating highly complex relationship challenges, Stephen helps individuals and couples find clarity and direction when everything is at stake.

Click to find out more >>> The Marriage Breakthrough Program
Stephen Hedger
Latest posts by Stephen Hedger (see all)
  • Loss of Love? How to Save Your Relationship - June 26, 2025
  • Passionless Marriage: “Sex life dying – want to know why?” - June 26, 2025
  • Coping with an Affair: How to Rebuild Trust and Save Your Marriage - June 26, 2025

Category iconUncategorized

The Marriage Breakthrough

"Follow simple yet powerful steps designed to save and reignite a marriage fast no matter what has happened"
Or call us now on 0845 519 4808
"Click to Claim Your FREE Consultation Now!"

Recent Posts

  • What If You Knew the Exact Mistakes That Destroy Marriages?
  • “What Do You Hear When I Speak?”
  • Your Marriage Isn’t Broken — The Pattern Is. Here’s How to Fix It.
  • The 5C Marriage Blueprint: The Foundation Every Relationship Needs to Thrive
  • The Silent Killer of Marriages: When You Stop Being You
  • Emotional Intimacy in Marriage: The Key to Trust, Connection, and Lasting Passion
  • Please Save Our Marriage – My Wife has Asked for a Divorce
  • Loss of Love? How to Save Your Relationship
  • Passionless Marriage: “Sex life dying – want to know why?”
  • Coping with an Affair: How to Rebuild Trust and Save Your Marriage
  • Feeling Torn Between Two Relationships?

Over 1300 Relationship Articles



Categories

  • 5C Marriage Blueprint (5)
    • Chemistry (1)
    • Clarity (1)
    • Communication (2)
    • Compassion (1)
    • Core (1)
  • A thought for Sunday (29)
  • Case Studies (2)
  • Communication (71)
  • Destructive Patterns (138)
  • Discussion (2)
  • Infidelity-Affairs (42)
  • Loss of Love (44)
  • Loss of passion (34)
  • Lost Attraction (22)
  • Marriage Coaching (445)
  • Marriage Mastery Assessment (1)
  • Masculine & Feminine (10)
  • Mini Posts (3)
  • Monday Breakthrough (2)
  • Personal Development (106)
  • Rebuilding trust (39)
  • Relationship Stories (25)
  • Retirement Crisis (6)
  • Save Marriage Alone (44)
  • Separation & Divorce (34)
  • Stop & Never – Mini Posts (54)
  • Stuck (9)
  • Testimonials (59)
  • Top 10 Popular Posts (12)
  • Uncategorized (750)

Primary Sidebar

I’m not going to ask you how you “feel", pay me to watch you argue, or try to find the person to blame.

I am looking to discover if the couple can become a team, overcome their problems together and create a dynamic that will create a loving and passionate life together.

My approach is to take you from where you are, to where you want to be… fast!

I can not recommend Stephen highly enough – he not only saved our marriage, but has improved my marriage and myself as a person.

Banker - London

Popular Posts

  • Women are struggling, but men don’t understand why
  • Built an Empire and lost a Family
  • Marriage in Limbo
  • Rebuilding Connection & Trust
  • Divorce Regret
  • Divorce Prevention
  • Resentment Stacking
  • 36 Principles For Success
  • My Wife is Aggressive
  • A Wise Old Man's Decision
  • I was in tears
  • Tourtured by the past

Do You Want
To Save Your Marriage?

Hi, I'm Stephen Hedger. I'm determined to help couples discover what their marriage is capable of with the right information. My only question is, will it be yours?

Learn more

A 30 minute call with Stephen

In a short phone conversation, Stephen was able to quickly get to the heart of what the real issue was in our marriage – and why in almost a year of working on our marriage including 10 weeks of marriage counselling through a relationship therapy organisation, we weren’t really making any progress. I found Stephen to be extremely perceptive, as well as empathetic to our situation, while being able to quickly pinpoint the real sticking point in our marriage.
Many thanks
Olivia

Dear Stephen
Thank you for your time to listen to my experience in my marriage. You gave me encouragement to speak out to my partner in confidence. You made me realise that sometimes the way we make comments on each other can aggravate the situation and make it worse. Your advice made me feel revived.

Kind regards

Chipo

Success Stories

From Battlefield to Breakthrough: How to Save Your Marriage Without a Toxic Fight.

January 31, 2025 By Stephen Hedger

Most people who come to me for help believe their marriage is broken, so their level of hope is not high. Many will have tried to fix the problems without success. These people are unaware that there is a critical mindset shift: if you don’t make it, your chances of success dramatically drop. As you […]

“By changing yourself, you can change a relationship… because I did!”

September 16, 2024 By Stephen Hedger

We were in the process of physical separation, with my husband arranging to move out at the end of the month, and I was getting legal advice on proceeding with the divorce.  On one of those distressed and sleepless nights, I came across Stephen’s website and his blog. I was fascinated. What Stephen has written […]

“There’s no hope in hell – I want a divorce!”

April 22, 2024 By Stephen Hedger

So what do you do when the trust is broken so badly that their relationship ends with them selling their family home and moving into separate homes? Most people would consider this the end, but this gentleman decided something different. He wrote to me to see if I could help. I wanted to encourage his […]

Marriage Crisis from Infidelity & Communication Breakdown

August 21, 2023 By Stephen Hedger

Today’s post is about a professional couple in the UK who decided they wanted to share their experience of their tailormade program that was designed to help them out of their marital challenges. They were in crisis due to communication breakdown and infidelity. They had 12 meetings over five months to learn how to reconnect […]

His Marriage was Over!

June 5, 2023 By Stephen Hedger

This man was in the depths of sadness; his marriage was over, but he didn’t want it to be. They had seen numerous counsellors who had all concluded the marriage was indeed over. He had lost all feelings for his wife. Due to being so stuck for so long, he had started an affair. But […]

Footer

Expert Help Available Worldwide via Zoom

For assistance from Stephen, contact his team at:

📞 +44 (0)845 519 4808



Head Office
10 Harley Street
London
W1G 9PF
United Kingdom



Recent Clients: Scotland, Ireland, Texas, New York, Dubai, Los Angeles, Austrailia, Japan, Germany, France, Ireland, UK, Monaco to name a few.

Stephen Hedger offers married couples in crisis across the globe a comprehensive strategic roadmap to overcome their marriage problems.

Today Stephen works with Celebrities, CEO’s, Lawyers, Bankers, Royalty, Judges, and business owners helping them transform their family and personal relationships with massive breakthroughs, seemingly against all odds.

  • Marriage Counselling Alternative
  • Cloe Hedger (Stephen’s wife)
  • Marriage Breakthrough Program
  • Individual Coaching
  • About
  • Clients Success Stories
  • Explore 1,300+ FREE life changing articles
  • FREE Marriage in Crisis Guide
  • FAQs
  • Private Diagnostic Marriage Assessment

Recent Posts

  • What If You Knew the Exact Mistakes That Destroy Marriages?
  • “What Do You Hear When I Speak?”
  • Your Marriage Isn’t Broken — The Pattern Is. Here’s How to Fix It.
  • The 5C Marriage Blueprint: The Foundation Every Relationship Needs to Thrive
  • The Silent Killer of Marriages: When You Stop Being You

*Disclaimer:
Any testimonials stated on this page or on any pages on the Stephen Hedger Marriage Coach website/s are proof of our success, naturally, results may vary from person to person.

Apply For Help Here Now...

Terms & Privacy Policy      Copyright © 2025 StephenHedger.com. All rights reserved. Company No.08279028    Return to top