Stephen Hedger

Crisis Marriage Advisor | Harley Street London

I’m sure that when the word truth is spoken we can all agree that truth and honesty is something we all value and respect highly.

BUT are we really being truthful to ourselves about ourselves?

Many people come to coaching with a set of beliefs that they think are true, only to discover that their truth is actually a mask, and their real truth is very different and hiding behind their deepest fears.

In fact they believe their made-up truth so much they will live in a mask for many years. Deep down they know something is wrong, but to focus on the reality is far too painful and so they put it off… until something snaps and just living each day becomes painful.

So they avoid the focus on their real feelings and to be happy they distort and delete parts of their lives in a quest to rebalance some level of normality.

Fears can only limit you

The problem is, from this state of fear people are only able to limit their true self. So the quest to rebalance their lives is an illusion they give themselves, that ends up being a fact in their own minds.

The illusion is not their truth and so individuals become unhappy and depressed and don’t know why. Their values are screaming a message, unhappiness and depression is the message that you have to change or this will get worse.

Listen to the messages because they are there for a reason. If your body gets hurt and you feel pain you stop what you are doing and you go to fix it.

Being unhappy emotionally is no different, but because there is no physical damage we assume we cannot fix these emotional problems and this puts us into a state of learnt helplessness.

  • I have worked with so many people who experience this very problem.

In fact you can feel so unsettled by a conflict of values that it will wake you at 3am to tell you something is wrong. Many of my clients experience this exact message from their own minds, and it’s a well known problem for those who are depressed on some level.

Are you hiding from your truth?

There will be a good reason why you would hide, but at some point you will have to deal with this. So create courage and face your  truth today to free yourself to live the life you were designed to live.

Stephen Hedger
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