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Stephen Hedger

Stephen Hedger

Crisis Marriage Coach | Harley Street London

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“Who has POWER over you”?

I remember my first ever meeting with a life coach, he asked me a question “who had my power”?

It was a great question that over the years has gathered even more meaning.

You see whilst every person has access to emotions such as anger, frustration, sadness to name a few.

Given a choice why would we chose to experience painful emotions when there are so many pleasurable ones to experience?

Why would anyone hand their power to another person to make them feel these painful types of emotions?

Shouldn’t our emotions be our own choice of what to we want to create and experience?

Only a small percentage of people are aware this is even possible and so they live painful reactive lives.

This is the challenge that so many people face because they live in such an out of control reactive emotional states themselves that other people end up being the director of what they feel.

This will lead that person to suffer.

If other people were actually in charge of how we feel we would experience a profound loss of freedom, sadly this is exactly what is happening almost everywhere.

This is why some people who are in constant relationship problems have a profound need for freedom, they don’t know how to have that freedom whilst being with their partner so they separate or divorce to achieve it.

People will say, “You made me feel”! “You upset me”! This concept is not possible, others can influence or trigger us, but after that, the creation of any feelings is all your own creation.

So is it possible that I have to leave you because I don’t like what I’m doing to myself when I’m with you? Yes, many people do this by misunderstanding their partners’ emotions and intentions.

They are so out of control of themselves and how they translate their world they can’t bear themselves at times.

So instead of taking back the power of choice when triggered, they try to remove the possibility of being triggered and now their world is getting smaller and they can end up alone.

So the important message for today is to take your power back and do not allow the actions and emotions of others to create the emotions in you that you don’t want?

The right approach is to choose the emotions you want to experience that will gain you the best version of you in any situation.

Just because the world goes crazy around you it doesn’t mean you have to emotionally join in and inflict their pain on you.

This doesn’t mean we shouldn’t care, what it means is when two people have lost control who is driving them to safety?

My advice is to not get on the out of control rollover coaster of other peoples issues or problems, that way you are emotionally in the best place to design the outcomes you would like for yourself and for them.

This could be your chance to free those around you from their out of control emotions.

I know many will now say “HOW”?

The answer is in understanding the mechanics of how you work as a human and developing a more effective relationship with yourself first.

It’s why much of my couples work starts with the individuals first.

If your relationship with yourself is broken, your relationship with others will always be a distortion and painful experience and you may need to control them so you feel happy.

Please know the process of taking your power back is linked to giving those you love their power back too.

You must free those around you in the process of freeing yourself.

Love and passion are energies that must be free or they will die so it’s up to you to chose your path now you know.

  • About
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Stephen Hedger
Stephen Hedger
About the author:

Harley Street Expert | Founder & High Performance Coach

With two decades of experience helping couples out of crisis, Stephen the founder of The Marriage Breakthrough Program, uses his proven system for rescuing and rebuilding relationships on the edge of divorce. A trusted advisor to CEOs, entrepreneurs, and industry leaders globally, his work blends emotional intelligence with strategic clarity. Known for navigating highly complex relationship challenges, Stephen helps individuals and couples find clarity and direction when everything is at stake.

Find out more >>> The Marriage Breakthrough Program
Stephen Hedger
Latest posts by Stephen Hedger (see all)
  • Why You Love Each Other But Don’t Want Each Other - June 19, 2025
  • “Your Marriage is On FIRE” - June 17, 2025
  • What If Everything You’re Trying to Fix… Isn’t the Problem? - June 13, 2025

Category iconMarriage Coaching,  Personal Development






Marriage Breakthrough Client

"Working with Stephen was the most valuable 12 hours of my life. He gave me the tools to build a deeply loving, passionate relationship. His compassion, humour, and insight truly transformed me as a man."

ANDY - CEO & FOUNDER

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Recent Posts

  • Why You Love Each Other But Don’t Want Each Other
  • “Your Marriage is On FIRE”
  • What If Everything You’re Trying to Fix… Isn’t the Problem?
  • FREE Coaching: 5 Days to Clarity in Your Marriage
  • Helping Women Understand Their Husbands
  • What to Do When Your Marriage Is Failing — Real Answers That Work
  • Betrayed by an Affair: How to Survive Infidelity and Rebuild Your Marriage
  • Husbands May Only Become What She Believes Him to Be – Mini Post
  • “I feel nothing… and he’s no idea why!” – MiniPost
  • 7 Steps For a Successful Marriage Repair Process
  • Do You Know Your Values & Why They Are So Important?

Over 1300 Relationship Articles



Categories

  • A thought for Sunday (29)
  • Case Studies (2)
  • Communication (70)
  • Destructive Patterns (137)
  • Discussion (2)
  • Infidelity-Affairs (42)
  • Loss of Love (43)
  • Loss of passion (35)
  • Lost Attraction (22)
  • Marriage Coaching (435)
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  • Monday Breakthrough (2)
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  • Stuck (9)
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  • Top 10 Popular Posts (12)
  • Uncategorized (761)

Primary Sidebar

I’m not going to ask you how you “feel", pay me to watch you argue, or try to find the person to blame.

I am looking to discover if the couple can become a team, overcome their problems together and create a dynamic that will create a loving and passionate life together.

My approach is to take you from where you are, to where you want to be… fast!

I can not recommend Stephen highly enough – he not only saved our marriage, but has improved my marriage and myself as a person.

Banker - London

Popular Posts

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Do You Want
To Save Your Marriage?

Hi, I'm Stephen Hedger. I'm determined to help couples discover what their marriage is capable of with the right information. My only question is, will it be yours?

Learn more

A 30 minute call with Stephen

In a short phone conversation, Stephen was able to quickly get to the heart of what the real issue was in our marriage – and why in almost a year of working on our marriage including 10 weeks of marriage counselling through a relationship therapy organisation, we weren’t really making any progress. I found Stephen to be extremely perceptive, as well as empathetic to our situation, while being able to quickly pinpoint the real sticking point in our marriage.
Many thanks
Olivia

Dear Stephen
Thank you for your time to listen to my experience in my marriage. You gave me encouragement to speak out to my partner in confidence. You made me realise that sometimes the way we make comments on each other can aggravate the situation and make it worse. Your advice made me feel revived.

Kind regards

Chipo

Success Stories

From Battlefield to Breakthrough: How to Save Your Marriage Without a Toxic Fight.

January 31, 2025 By Stephen Hedger

Most people who come to me for help believe their marriage is broken, so their level of hope is not high. Many will have tried to fix the problems without success. These people are unaware that there is a critical mindset shift: if you don’t make it, your chances of success dramatically drop. As you […]

“By changing yourself, you can change a relationship… because I did!”

September 16, 2024 By Stephen Hedger

We were in the process of physical separation, with my husband arranging to move out at the end of the month, and I was getting legal advice on proceeding with the divorce.  On one of those distressed and sleepless nights, I came across Stephen’s website and his blog. I was fascinated. What Stephen has written […]

“There’s no hope in hell – I want a divorce!”

April 22, 2024 By Stephen Hedger

So what do you do when the trust is broken so badly that their relationship ends with them selling their family home and moving into separate homes? Most people would consider this the end, but this gentleman decided something different. He wrote to me to see if I could help. I wanted to encourage his […]

Marriage Crisis from Infidelity & Communication Breakdown

August 21, 2023 By Stephen Hedger

Today’s post is about a professional couple in the UK who decided they wanted to share their experience of their tailormade program that was designed to help them out of their marital challenges. They were in crisis due to communication breakdown and infidelity. They had 12 meetings over five months to learn how to reconnect […]

His Marriage was Over!

June 5, 2023 By Stephen Hedger

This man was in the depths of sadness; his marriage was over, but he didn’t want it to be. They had seen numerous counsellors who had all concluded the marriage was indeed over. He had lost all feelings for his wife. Due to being so stuck for so long, he had started an affair. But […]

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Head Office
10 Harley Street
London
W1G 9PF
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Recent Clients: Scotland, Ireland, Texas, New York, Dubai, Los Angeles, Austrailia, Japan, Germany, France, Ireland, UK, Monaco to name a few.

Stephen Hedger offers married couples in crisis across the globe a comprehensive strategic roadmap to overcome their marriage problems.

Today Stephen works with Celebrities, CEO’s, Lawyers, Bankers, Royalty, Judges, and business owners helping them transform their family and personal relationships with massive breakthroughs, seemingly against all odds.

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Recent Posts

  • Why You Love Each Other But Don’t Want Each Other
  • “Your Marriage is On FIRE”
  • What If Everything You’re Trying to Fix… Isn’t the Problem?
  • FREE Coaching: 5 Days to Clarity in Your Marriage
  • Helping Women Understand Their Husbands

*Disclaimer:
Any testimonials stated on this page or on any pages on the Stephen Hedger Marriage Coach website/s are proof of our success, naturally, results may vary from person to person.

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