“Does he know how you really feel…?”

Many men in my sessions are surprised to discover that their partners do not communicate a large percentage of what they really feel.

Many women hold back their true feelings to protect their relationship. They know that if they communicated how they really felt their partners would not cope. These women may have usually tried communicating in the past, but their partners used emotional responses such as anger, frustration, escape to rebalance the situation.

Women in these situations are in pain emotionally and what they really want is love, but because this makes no sense to their men they get the reverse of what they really need.

Women in this place can feel detached and numb and over time as they can feel they are not getting through to their partners. This can feel like a very lonely and unloved place for her.

She needs some level of certainty in her life and holding back how she feels is something she knows she can do.

Over time she holds back more and more. She starts to feel she is changing and the relationship no longer feels the same as the trust dies.

The intimacy would have gone by now and resentment and loss of respect becomes the model in the relationship

The reality is through a lack of understanding from both perspectives couples can find themselves in places they never intended to be in. At the moment she needs him to be the security for her she quickly learns she has to be that security for herself this has a dramatic effect on her.

  • Is this happening in your relationship? Do you feel that you can’t be honest about your feelings with him because of the way he reacts if you are?

In sessions I help couples break through this destructive pattern. So what seems like an impossible situation can quickly turn into growth love and understanding.

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About Stephen Hedger

International relationship expert Stephen Hedger's philosophy on relationship problems is this: Couples fail to understand their relationships because they are too focused on their problems and so they totally miss what created them. Stephen's approach is a refreshing and enlightening journey that helps couples uncover their truth. His strategies uncover the knowledge that all couples need to create a successful and lasting passionate connection. If you are in crisis and you need help, book an initial consultation today to get your life back on track.