“Please don’t panic?”

Don’t panic is a message I give all my clients whilst I help them understand their crisis to the point they can make an intelligent decision about their life direction.

Panicked people who are scared, lost in their life or marriages will create behaviours that can lead them to survival based behaviours that for many disable them getting to their truth.

Today’s post is about seeing the truth and trusting yourself to lead you and your family to physical and emotional safety.

Life is constantly giving us lessons that either we recognise or we ignore. The key to being successful in life is being able to see those lessons so we can keep ourselves and our families safe.

I’m currently helping clients understand they are leaders and it’s their job to lead their family to physical and emotional safety.

A true leader is one that really understands the situation they are in, accepts that situation and then finds a way to grow towards the outcome that’s for the good of all.

A true leader is confident in their decisions because the foundation of a leader comes from the wisdom of knowing what to do because they can see the problems and the outcomes clearly.

Many people don’t have the ability to understand the situation they are in so they make it significantly worse without knowing why.

Leaders don’t emotionally react – they consider, they learn, they plan and they act. The most effective leaders are prepared for a crisis and have either been practising effective prevention whilst knowing what to do when/if crisis strikes.

A true leader does not make the situation worse in their own mind so as to cripple their ability to be able to think clearly, they don’t panic themselves and certainly don’t frighten those that follow.

The best version of themselves is what they will need to lead themselves and their family to real safety.

A true leader does not cross their fingers and make the situation better in their own mind so as to give themselves the illusion that no action is required, that type of leader is blind and not helpful to themselves and those that follow.

The key to becoming great leaders in your family is to keep searching to understand your situation so you can help those that are fearful or lost.

Over the past few weeks, I have had more men attend sessions alone looking to understand how they can build more confidence, strength and understanding in their own situations.

These men know something is wrong in their approach to their life and so they need to gain clarity to become an effective leader of their lives and their businesses.

In each of these men the missions were the same, they firstly had to learn who they must become to be worthy of the life and outcomes they desired.

Being an effective leader whether it’s being a leader of a family, a business or a community comes from the ability to understand the reality of the situation they are in.

They must understand the critical moving parts of that situation and are able to guide those that follow to a safe place where they can grow and rebuild.

The most effective leaders know it’s what you don’t know will hurt you so they plan for success through living in summer as if it’s winter they learn, they save, they store.

In other words, they plan and learn, they don’t live expecting the good times to continue, they know a change is always coming.

In relationships, they are ever-changing so it’s critical to know what to do when this happens. The economy is up and down so it’s critical to save and not spend all you earn.

Everyone today is being given a lesson to learn, the most effective leaders are the ones that will find a way through their challenges.

The wisest people on the planet are very aware there is so much they don’t know so they live life as students.

The most lost people only start to wake up to what they need to learn when a crisis hits, life changes and causes them pain and suffering.

The most lost people are the ones that never learn and so live in reaction and blame others.

In marriage men and women need to learn the skills to become the very best versions of themselves so they can become effective leaders of themselves and those they love.

This is a critical life skill that can filter into business, money, health etc

There is never a case where being the worst version of yourself will solve any crisis.

In a marital crisis, almost every couple arrives in my office in the worst version of themselves when they are with their partner.

Every couple on the planet is incompatible if they practice this so this is not a truth of what that couple is capable of.

So don’t panic you’ll only make it worse, don’t worry because worry never solves anything, get smart, get strong and learn so you can grow towards what it is you really want.

About Stephen Hedger

International relationship expert Stephen Hedger's philosophy on relationship problems is this: Couples fail to understand their relationships because they are too focused on their problems and so they totally miss what created them. Stephen's approach is a refreshing and enlightening journey that helps couples uncover their truth. His strategies uncover the knowledge that all couples need to create a successful and lasting passionate connection. If you are in crisis and you need help, book an initial consultation today to get your life back on track.